Welcome to our deep‑dive into the top ten fascinating aspects of the Hermit Kingdom – a place where propaganda, oppression, and absurdity intertwine in ways most of us can barely imagine. Grab a drink, brace yourself, and let’s wander through the strangest corners of North Korea.
Top Ten Fascinating Overview
10 Propaganda Village
If the North Korean populace ever catches sight of the so‑called village of Kijong‑dong, they’re unlikely to crack the obvious penis joke hidden in its name – and we certainly won’t either. This phantom settlement, perched near the Demilitarized Zone, boasts one of the tallest flagpoles on the planet and even has electricity, a rarity for rural locales in the DPRK. Unlike its southern counterpart, Taesong‑dong, the northern “dong” is completely empty of residents. State propaganda claims it houses 200 cheerful families dutifully worshipping the Juche doctrine, but that’s pure fabrication.
In reality, Kijong‑dong is a staged set. Only the occasional maintenance worker wanders its streets, constantly bombarded with Korean opera, marching songs, and endless speeches broadcast toward South Korea – a thinly veiled mockery of their “civilized” ways of wearing shoes and avoiding starvation. This list is already heading into dark territory, but the truth remains: the people of North Korea endure unimaginable misery when their most impressive village is merely a giant middle finger to their southern neighbors. And we’ve only just begun.
9 Kidnapping Film Directors And Forcing Them To Make A Communist Godzilla
North Korea may be infamous for its repressive regime, but it also boasts a remarkably original approach to cinema. Forget the usual war‑drama scripts; the DPRK prefers colossal socialist reptiles crushing bourgeois oppressors. Enter Pulgasari, the nation’s very own Commie‑Gojira, which rolled out with full ideological backing. The problem? Skilled directors and actors are scarce – a side effect of widespread poverty and a society that leaves most citizens clueless about cameras.
To fill this creative void, the regime resorted to kidnapping. Notable South Korean talent like actress Choi Eun‑Hee and her director husband were snatched in separate Hong Kong operations during the late 1970s. They were forced into a clandestine film‑making factory, churning out movies that never saw the light of day. After a daring ruse that convinced Kim Jong Il everything was “fine,” they escaped to Vienna.
Officially, North Korea admits to abducting 13 individuals in the 1970s and 1980s. Five were repatriated to Japan in 2002, while Pyongyang claims the remaining eight perished – a statement Japan disputes. Scholar Andre Lankov estimates roughly 500 South Koreans have been taken, most of them fishermen who strayed too close to the North Korean coast, though the tally also includes covert operatives. Whether they ended up as lab assistants for the rubber lizard or met a harsher fate remains a grim mystery.
8 Being Forced To Poop By The Government
Imagine being reduced to a walking fertilizer factory. In 2013, a Beijing source reported that, due to a severe shortage of chemical fertilizers, the North Korean government ordered every citizen to generate hundreds of kilograms of human waste each year. This absurd mandate forced a populace already grappling with starvation to produce massive quantities of excrement for agricultural use.
Even a British diet would struggle to meet such a quota, let alone a starving North Korean one. Rumors swirl online about a covert deal with the United States to deliver Shia LaBeouf – humorously rumored to be the ultimate waste‑producing machine – but the truth remains that ordinary people were coerced into this grotesque labor.
7 Becoming A State‑Sponsored Military‑Grade Hooker And Feeding A Dictator Shark Dong
When I first met Kim Jong Il, he looked like any ordinary neighbour… with brown spots on his face and yellowed teeth. My naive admiration for the great leader shattered instantly.
This is the testimony of Mi Hyang, a former member of the regime’s “pleasure squad” who later defected to South Korea. The squad, managed at the state level, was not merely for Kim Jong Il but also for senior cadres, serving at official functions. According to Professor Koh Yu Hwan, the women were essentially on duty to glorify the DPRK.
Kim Jong Il reportedly enjoyed a diet that included shark penis, a bizarre delicacy that complemented his lavish $800,000‑a‑year Hennessy habit. Recruitment for the squad began straight out of school: officers would visit schools, hand‑pick female students, and separate them for this purpose. The regime’s exploitation mirrors the worst excesses of a decadent West, with powerful men exploiting vulnerable girls with impunity.
6 Being Dependent On Communists Who Disappeared 30 Years Ago For Electricity
While the 1990s saw Generation X debating the merits of the Clinton era and the grunge era’s soundtrack, North Korea was already shrouded in darkness. Rural citizens, lacking any concept of alternative rock, lived under perpetual night. Satellite images reveal only a single bright patch – the capital Pyongyang – where government buildings, the Kim palace, and the towering Juche Tower remain lit around the clock.
Despite years of sanctions and offers of food and energy aid contingent on dismantling the nuclear program, the regime stubbornly refuses. The lack of reliable electricity denies citizens access to even the most basic entertainment, from reruns of “MacGyver” to “The Bachelor.” For perspective, South Koreans consume roughly 10,162 kWh per person annually, while North Koreans average a meager 739 kWh – a tiny contribution to climate change, but a massive deprivation for its people.
5 Praising Murderous Dictators In Western Media Because You Hate The President
If “diplomatic dance” were a Winter Olympic event, Kim Yo Jong would take gold. With a smile and a handshake, she captured the attention of Western outlets during the 2018 Pyeongchang Games, even as CNN lauded her while simultaneously criticizing the United States. The irony is stark: a regime responsible for executions by flamethrower, mortars, and anti‑aircraft guns receives media adulation simply because it offers a convenient contrast to a disliked president.
Kim Yo Jong, as the director of propaganda and agitation, is part of a system that has, under Kim Jong Un, executed at least 340 individuals by 2016, according to a South Korean think‑tank. The Western media’s fascination with her reflects a ratings‑driven appetite for sensationalism, often overlooking the grim reality behind the glossy façade.
4 Stealing Volvos From Sweden Because They Are Degenerate Western Dogs
Stealing cars is a crime, but the North Korean leadership took it to a new level in the 1970s. Swedish socialists, eager to forge ties with the DPRK, arranged a deal for 1,000 brand‑new 1974 Volvos. Kim Jong Il accepted the shipment with a laugh, refusing to pay the agreed sum and leaving Sweden with a staggering debt now exceeding three billion Kronor (about €300 million).
These luxurious Volvos, once equipped with leather seats, now reportedly smell of stale taxi fumes and starvation. Sweden continues to grapple with the financial fallout, while the regime proudly regards the Swedes as imperialist puppets of the United States.
3 Escaping A Gulag Nation Only To Be Forced Into Sex Slavery
One might assume that crossing the border into China offers a straightforward escape from the DPRK’s horrors, but the reality is far more tragic. Roughly 80 % of North Korean defectors who reach China are women, and an alarming 90 % fall victim to human trafficking. In a market where a North Korean woman can fetch up to $2,000, many are bought by wealthy Chinese men, effectively becoming forced brides.
Kung Su Jin, head of the Coalition for North Korean Women’s Rights in Seoul, describes how these women are sold to farmers, elderly men, or disabled individuals, enduring beatings, rape, and severe abuse. Those caught by Chinese authorities are often repatriated to North Korea and thrown into concentration camps, sealing a fate of perpetual suffering.
2 Women Are Second‑Class Citizens But Also The Main Breadwinners
While the DPRK’s oppression permeates every facet of life, the gender‑based restrictions are particularly insidious. Women are prohibited from riding bicycles, a seemingly trivial ban that cripples their ability to earn a living. The Juche doctrine of self‑reliance, in practice, reduces citizens to state‑controlled laborers, effectively making them slaves.
Women, often relegated to lower‑pay factory work, become the primary earners for their families, relying on bicycles as the sole transportation to markets. A North Korean woman living in Seoul told Human Rights Watch that without a bike, she cannot sustain her household, and skirts make long rides impractical. The state‑imposed fines for violating dress codes or riding without permission further erode any potential earnings, cementing a cycle of poverty and control.
1 It Sucks Being A Kid In North Korea
Children in the DPRK face a bleak existence. With pervasive poverty, chronic food shortages, and a regime that can execute you for an illegal haircut, youthful exuberance is stifled. Over 13 million North Koreans suffer from malnutrition, including 60 % of children – the worst rate among 110 developing nations surveyed by UNICEF and WHO. Infant mortality stands at 22.1 per 1,000 live births, seven times higher than in South Korea.
Despite these hardships, the state ensures that children receive a curriculum steeped in anti‑American propaganda, complete with toy guns and grenades. Those deemed “fit” attend school, while others are forced into agricultural labor from a tender age. On International Children’s Day, Pyongyang stages mock military parades featuring children dressed as soldiers, and the privileged few are sent to learn accordion or cheerleading for years, all to glorify the Kim dynasty.
In short, living, working, or even attempting to trade with North Korea is a nightmare. The safest advice? Stay far, stay informed, and stay away.