The toys and games we grow up with play a major role in our childhoods and development. Whether it was an addictive board game, a customizable doll, or a remote-controlled vehicle, kids’ toys have come in all shapes and sizes. However, toy manufacturers don’t always hit the mark and sometimes release products that stir up trouble. Whether they were made with dangerous material or resulted in an unfortunate accident, these are ten children’s toys that got taken off the market. 

10. Aqua Dots

Aqua Dots was a simple but charming concept, small plastic dots that you could turn into an art piece with just a spray of water. Simply put the small orbs in the special mold in the shape or image of your choice, spritz it with some water, and the dots will stick together. The concept almost felt partway between Lego bricks and Play-Doh, a toy for kids who like to sculpt or build things. The commercial outlined all the toys’ upsides but neglected to mention its one unfortunate pitfall. 

Aqua Dots soon found itself in hot water when several children consumed the dots not long after its release, resulting in hospitalizations. The adhesive, meant to glue the dots together, when consumed resulted in dizziness, vomiting, and even prolonged states of unconsciousness. 

The toys’ manufacturer, Spin Factory, ended up paying over 1 million in civil penalties for failing to report the dangerous nature of the Aqua Dots and for selling a banned hazardous substance. The product was swiftly yanked from toy shelves, preventing other children from any more toxic reactions. 

9. Cabbage Patch Snacktime Kids

As children’s toys have evolved, there has been a great effort by companies to make dolls and action figures as interactive as possible. Whether it was giving dolls voice boxes to allow for verbal interactions with kids or adding other features like swimming or even eating.

It was the latter that unfortunately landed Mattel’s then-newly minted line of Cabbage Patch Snacktime Kids in trouble. The Cabbage Patch Kids have been a juggernaut within the toy world since they arrived in 1978, dazzling kids with their cute and huggable designs. As the years went on, an effort was made to push the doll in new directions, resulting in some hits and some definite misfires. The Snacktime variants were most definitely a misfire, as its eating feature, meant for the plastic food it was packaged with, resulted in several kids getting hurt. Not only could the doll not tell the difference between plastic and a child’s fingers, but it would gobble up hair as well.

This resulted in the toy being recalled, with later releases needing a printed warning for parents and children to see. Following this, Mattel opted to scrap the toy entirely and offer a 40 dollar refund to anyone who’d bought it. 

8. Sky Dancers

If you ever want to grab a child’s interest quickly, presenting them with a flying toy is usually a perfect way to do it. Whether it’s a remote-controlled airplane or a parachuting army man, make a toy that can soar through the air, and kids will start lining up. 

Galoob put this notion into practice when they created Sky Dancers in the mid-90s, dolls with foam wings and a pull-string base. All you needed to do was load the doll onto the base, pull the string and it would be propelled into the air with its wings spinning like propellers. This feature, combined with the dolls’ colorful designs, made for a visually dazzling toy, as well as a short-lived animated series.

Unfortunately, Sky Dancers soon proved that they were as potentially deadly as they were pretty, resulting in a slew of child inquiries. By the mid-00s, Galoob had bit slammed with 170 reports of Sky Dancers hitting kids in the face, eyes, mouth, and torso, resulting in broken teeth, cracked ribs, and facial lacerations. This resulted in nearly 10,000,000 units being yanked from store shelves, with the Sky Dancers brand remaining dead until it was relaunched in 2005.

7. Moon Shoes

Trampolines are a time-tested way to get kids jumping for joy, pun most definitely intended, with many companies taking the concept in fascinating directions. Moon Shoes had their start in the 1950s, albeit made out of metal and stiff coil springs. The idea was that you could clamp them onto your normal shoes like roller skates and bounce your way around. 

Lack of practicality aside, the idea seemed to strike a chord with some people, as it lasted long enough for a relaunch in the 1990s. This time around, the toy was retooled with high-density plastic, adjustable velcro straps, and bungee-like springs, as opposed to harsh metal pieces. While safer when compared to its metal counterpart from the 50s, the concept was still flawed from the jump, pun once again intended. 

While never outright recalled like other toys, Moon Shoes still resulted in kids tripping, falling, scraping their knees, spraining their ankles, and getting all banged up. While a nifty idea on paper, the concept simply wasn’t practical or even enjoyable enough to become a sustainable toy brand. So ultimately Moon Shoes were banned, making them another curious oddity of yesteryear that people look back on with humor and regret. 

6. Easy-Bake Ovens

For many young girls, the Hasbro Easy-Bake Oven was a true game changer and one of the coolest ideas to ever hit toy shelves. The concept was simple, a small oven that kids could use to make different kinds of snacks in the comfort of their playrooms. Kids definitely loved them because the concept survived beyond the 1960s and well into the 2000s, resulting in several generations enjoying the Easy-Bake brand. 

Sadly, when you give young children what’s essentially a small oven, sooner or later a child is going to feel the heat. In 2006, Hasbro opted to redesign the Easy-Bake Oven, dropping the long-running push-through design in favor of a front-loading one. This soon proved to be an epic mistake, as this redux resulted in several children getting their hands or fingers caught in the oven door, resulting in painful burns! One injury was so severe that it resulted in a 5-year-old girl needing a partial finger amputation following her Easy-Bake injury.

Any Easy-Bake Oven with the front-loading design was recalled from stores, with a safer model soon taking its place. Nowadays, Easy-Bake Ovens remain a staple of Hasbro’s products and still have a place in the hearts of those who’ve grown up with it.

5. Lawn Darts

If anything can be learned from this compilation of recalled playthings, it’s that toys have truly come in all shapes and sizes over the decades. Lawn Darts emerged in the 1950s when toy manufacturers thought that the classic bar game could be reworked into a family game you could play at home. Very quickly, Lawn Darts, or jarts as some would call them, quickly caught on as a fun game for the family and neighborhood get-togethers. 

The idea was simple, the players would attempt to throw the metal-tipped darts into a ring on the lawn, the goal being to get as many rings in as possible. However, as you might be able to deduce on your own, a metal spike that you throw through the air would present some definite safety issues. Even as far back as the 70s, the FDA was classifying the sharp-pointed lawn darts as mechanical hazards, noting the product’s potential to cause injury.

This fear became a reality when, in 1987, 7-year-old Michelle Snow was killed by a lawn dart that was thrown by one of her brother’s friends during an outdoor playdate. This, on top of countless other reports of Lawn Dart-related issues, resulted in the toy being banned, with re-selling of the older version being deemed illegal. 

4. Aqua Leisure Baby Floats

Teaching children to swim from a young age is very important and a trend that toy companies have been more than happy to capitalize on. From shark and superhero-themed swimwear to pool noodles to boogie boards, toy companies have been more than happy to help facilitate Summertime fun in the pool. These pool toys have even been made so that even infants and toddlers can get in on the fun in a safe way. 

However, not every infant-aimed pool toy has gone according to plan, with some coming with some unfortunate built-in problems. The Aqua Leisure Baby Floats were created by Aqua-Leisure Industries Inc. as a way to safely keep babies and toddlers afloat, much like a stroller on water. A fun concept for sure, but it seems that the Aqua-Leisure team needed to beta test their idea a bit more before release. 

Per the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission, “The leg holes in the seat of the float can tear, causing children to unexpectedly fall into the water and possibly drown.” Thankfully there were no reported injuries or deaths of any infants, but it was still determined that Aqua Leisure Baby Floats were far too dangerous to be kept in stock. 

3. Kinder Surprise

This one stands out as a bit of an outlier among this list, as Kinder Surprise Eggs aren’t toys per se. More accurately, they are a milk chocolate egg with a plastic capsule inside that, went opened up, reveals a small toy. 

The Kinder brand is owned by the Italian company Ferrero, the same people behind Ferrero chocolates, and has an interesting backstory. On Easter, in many Italian families, it’s not uncommon for adults to gift children chocolate eggs that have a toy inside, so this was meant to replicate that tradition. Since its debut in 1974, the product has gone on to become a favorite of kids and adults, at least for the ones that could legally obtain it. It seems that a chocolate egg with an unedible toy nestled inside of it doesn’t fly in the United States the same way that it does in Italy. 

Simply put, the Federal Food, Drug, and Cosmetic Act prevents the sale of any candy item with a toy inside of it. This meant that any Kinder Eggs brought into the USA were considered to be illegal imports and couldn’t officially be sold in stores. Over in the United Kingdom, 3 families unfortunately lost children as a result of them choking on the toy, resulting in their swift withdrawal from the European Union.

2. Fisher-Price Rock ‘n Play Sleeper

As previously mentioned, toy safety, especially when infants and toddlers are involved, is something that should be taken very seriously. It’s certainly something Fisher-Price should’ve taken more seriously when they released the Fisher-Price Rock ‘n Play Sleeper back in 2009.

The Rock ’n Play was initially received quite well, helping parents get their babies to bed via its rocking and vibration features, as well as its music-playing capabilities. However, after a decade on the market, the Rock ’n Play was revealed to have resulted in approximately 100 infant deaths. It was later learned that Fisher-Price had only consulted with one family doctor regarding its safety and had conducted no clinical research. Upon investigation, it became clear that many of the deaths were the result of infants rolling onto their stomachs and being smothered by the Rock ‘n Play’s padding.

All of this resulted in the Rock ‘n Play being recalled en masse back in 2019, a full ten years after its original release. To this day, the product is still floating around on third-party websites and even some daycares, many unaware of its dangerous potential. 

1. Austin Magic Pistol

Standards for what is acceptable in kids’ toys have changed a lot since the 1900s, with safety and political correctness playing a major role in the transition. For example, nowadays if a child wants a toy gun, they’ll likely be given either a brightly colored water gun or a cartoonish space ray with a few LED lights on it. 

However, back in the late 1940s, kids had the Austin Magic Pistol, a toy that wouldn’t stand a chance of being greenlit today. Feelings on guns and gun safety, especially back then, were far different, with many having zero qualms about giving children weapons. This meant that something like the Austin Magic Pistol was made readily available for a brief time without issue. The gun would fire a ping pong ball with a chemical reaction between calcium carbide and water which resulted in a fireball!

This would be enough to get the toy classified as a legitimate firearm in most states, and yet it was a favorite for many kids. Soon enough though, cooler heads prevailed and the Austin Magic Pistol was removed from shelves. While never officially recalled, the Pistol is a prime example of the kinds of toys that we just don’t see in stores anymore, and for good reason. 

“Sex sells” is a saying that is as old as your grandma. You know the centerfolds and pictures designed to let the imagination run a little wild. For decades, sales have thrived on sexual fantasy.

But in the dot-com era, people now have the option to make their fantasies a reality. As my brother-in-law says, “If you want it, someone is selling it.” This is especially true when it comes to sex toys.

Although these toys are all real and popular in their own realms, they aren’t toys you’re likely to find in your Nana’s sock drawer. So let’s take a look at the top 10 toys guaranteed to scare your grandma.

Related: 10 Interesting Facts About The Rise Of Sex Robots

10 Xenophile Fetish: When Probing Goes Too Far

Aliens can take just about any shape; just look at the movies. And these sex toys are certainly out of this world…far, far out. Of course, they come in basic human forms, but why be boring? You can get designs that look like slime-covered blobs with tentacles. Size isn’t even an issue. Whether you’re into something tall, dark, and slimy or a little green man, there’s an alien sex toy for you.

If tentacles aren’t enough to fulfill your fantasies, then step it up to extraterrestrial egg implantation. Apparently, you can customize the eggs, too. Some people opt for gelatin, ice, silicon, or (for the really adventurous) you can DIY. I guess “live long and prosper” is about to take on a whole new meaning.

9 Harmony: The Sexbot

Admittedly, this one won’t fit in anyone’s sock drawer, and dolls are nothing new. So you might be asking what makes Harmony so different?

The answer is that she is so much more than the blowup “friend” your socially awkward uncle keeps under his bed. For one, Harmony is a robot, so she can move, smile, and embrace. But she’s also intelligent.

Her AI would be like Alexa if she actually listened to you. So the more you interact with her, the more Harmony will connect with you. What happens if you don’t use her? She gets sad.

Nothing like adding another relationship to your life that you can disappoint.

8 A Digital Chastity Device: What Could Go Wrong?

This one is arguably the least scary at first glance. It’s basically a ring with a tube attached that locks. But the nightmarish situations come into play when you add in the fact that someone else can control the lock with an app on your phone.

It’s enough of a struggle to get my grandparents to understand email, but having Nan ask, “How do I use this app?” would be a drink-inducing experience for everyone.

On the flip side, the entire point of a chastity cage is to build tension before unlocking, so the inability of the elderly to work with technology might be an added bonus.

A word of caution, though. Like any technology, hackers are always a possibility. This actually occurred with the Cellmate device, where hackers locked the devices and held the unsuspecting “member” for ransom. Before the company patched the software, some couples said they either paid or were considering cutting the device off.

7 Urethral Sounds: The World’s Sexiest Catheter

This one falls under medical play and definitely is a bit extreme. Although, if you’ve never seen one, you could come up with a bunch of vanilla explanations for what these are used for. Drink mixers, dull nutcrackers, tools for pressure points, all things to keep you in a safe place.

Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on where you fall on the kinky scale of this), urethral sounds are rods that are inserted into the urethra. At this point, you’re probably asking why on earth would people do this.

The simple answer is because they think it feels good, and it allows for simulation from a different angle on areas that are packed with nerves. Be careful, though—if it’s not done correctly, you can do some serious damage and might end up in the hospital with an actual catheter.

6 Electrified Genitals: Giving Granny the Shock of a Lifetime

Have you ever gone to a chiropractor or physical therapist and been hooked up to a TENS unit? You know, it’s the machine that sends electrical pulses through pads attached to your skin. Basically, it forces your muscles to contract and relax. It’s almost like getting sore muscles massaged after a good workout but without having to get rubbed down by a complete stranger.

Well, there are sexual TENS units designed to work well, especially below the belt. They have pads that can be nuzzled in just the right spots. In theory, this sounds great since I can remember all the times I used a TENS unit on my back or shoulder. But then I remember touching the electric chains in my grandpa’s milk barn, and it’s just not worth the risk.

5 Nothing Cute Has Ever Been Called Goliath

Think about it—David and Goliath, Goliath Spider, Goliath Grouper. All of these have two things in common. First, they aren’t cute. Impressive? Yes. Cute? Not so much. And second, they are huge. So it should come as no surprise that the girth on Mr. Hankey’s Goliath Sex Toy is massive.

Have you ever wondered about (or possibly missed) the sensation of pushing out a baby? Then this is the phallus for you. Just don’t be surprised when you can’t feel anything for a week or so after.

4 Animal Husbandry Isn’t Just for the Animals

Every owner of a male dog has seen the ever-present (yet surprising) red rocket. And that’s where it stops for most people. For others, curiosity is going to kill their cat. For people who like to live on the “wild” side, there’s actually a semi-hard silicone horse…appendage.

Wanting to get freaky with a four-legged companion isn’t anything new. Historically speaking, there have been several famous figures who enjoy getting “at one” with nature. In fact, Catherine the Great is known for widespread rumors that center around bedding her horse.

This kink is definitely not for everyone. What fantasy is? But if you’re into dragons and horses and dogs, “Oh my!” then Bestvibe has you covered.

3 Saddle Up, Sweetheart

Maybe the fantasy isn’t being with a horse. Maybe it’s about being the horse. Want to be a husky Clydesdale or a sleek Arabian? There’s an entire world dedicated to pony play—and a wide selection of toys to go with it.

Ears, tails, manes, bridles, etc., name an accessory or part of a horse, and there’s a made-for-humans option. From horse masks with reins to rubber bits and bridles, there are options for anyone ready to release their inner steed but not ready to publicly proclaim their foal-dom.

For the more adventurous or carefree geldings, there’s a yearly gathering where you and your equine partner can compete in events. Maybe this is the next evolution of the “horse girl” we all knew in school.

Putting a piece of metal in my mouth and pulling a cart around a field sounds a lot more like work than foreplay, but everyone is different. Still, seeing a herd of 10 or more people in full horse regalia galloping down a street would probably make grandma cross to the other side.

2 Arachnophobes, Skip This One

You read that right. You need to take arachnophilia to the max to enjoy this toy. This is one addition to the bedroom that could make your partner’s skin crawl. You literally pull a scorpion out of a small coffin, then send shivers up their spine with this vibrating invertebrate.

Don’t worry, though; it’s a hundred percent waterproof. So jumping in a pool won’t save them from this animated sex toy’s malleable stinger, scurrying feet, or squidgy pincers.

Although the toy’s name, “Death by Orgasm,” sounds like a fun way to go. LoveHoney, the brand behind this Halloween-themed toy, wants to help scorpion-lovers everywhere feel free to make a private oasis south of their equator. If you’re not a fan, you might just want to smash it with a book until it looks like your more like your gram’s cream of wheat.

1 Getting Some Sweet, Sweet Vibrations

Waking up in the morning can be the hardest part of the day. And the world’s been trying to find ways to make it easier for years. Some people use automatic coffee makers, so they wake up to the smell of their favorite roast. Others put their alarms out of reach, forcing them to get out of bed before shutting them off.

And then there’s “The Little Rooster.” This morning helper is a far cry from life on the farm. It’s actually a vaginal alarm clock that helps you wake up on time, giving you a sexual awakening daily. Sounds pretty good…as long as it stays where you put it the night before.

You’re probably rolling your eyes, thinking it sounds more like a rogue wave surfing session. But Wake Sexy, the clock’s brand, has thought of that too. You’re in control of the ending intensity, and the little rooster understands the importance of the build-up to a good sunrise. The rooster starts slow and gradually increases speed over about five minutes.

So next time your grandma asks if you want to start the day with some scrambled eggs, you can say, “I already did!”

These days, toy makers are held to stringent safety standards. Thanks to the ASTM F963: Standard Consumer Safety Specification for Toy Safety, U.S. toymakers must follow extensive rules and regulations.

But this wasn’t always the case. Before the government protected kids from things such as figurines covered with lead paint, older generations were handed some wild toys and told to go outside and play. This list presents ten toys that prove your grandparents were from a tougher age in history.

10 Belt Buckle Derringer Toy Gun

In 1959, Mattel gave the world a toy gun that didn’t need hands to work. The Belt Buckle Derringer Toy Gun could be fired in the usual way while holding it. Or, if you found yourself in a position where you needed to fire a gun while your hands were otherwise occupied, you were in luck. This gun could be attached to a belt buckle and fired when the wearer thrust their hips forward.

What could possibly go wrong with small boys running around with toy cap guns attached to their waist that fired plastic bullets when they waggled their hips? As you might imagine, the guns sometimes went off at unintended times, in unintended directions, although most likely, the intended times the guns fired must have resulted in enough mayhem alone.^[1]

9 Gilbert Glass Blowing Set

“I wish my young daughter had a kit to shape and form molten glass” is a thought I have never had. However, somebody must have had this thought at some point because a real glass-blowing set for children used to exist.

The A.C. Gilbert Company, which is now out of business, was known for its erector, trains, and chemistry sets—standard kid’s fare, to be sure. However, in the 1920s, A.C. Gilbert offered something special, a working glass-blowing set.

Known as the Experimental Glass Blowing Kit for Boys, the kit contained a blow torch for heating glass until it was malleable, tubes for blowing into and shaping the glass, and a book of “fun” experiments in which children were instructed to hold the heated glass in their hands. For the record, for glass to get hot enough to shape, it has to be heated to at least 1500°F (815°C).^[2]

8 Austin Magic Pistol

Toy guns were popular back in the day, but the Austin Magic Pistol was a special one that looked like it came straight from outer space. This toy gun from the 1940s had a futuristic look and launched ping pong balls. Sounds pretty harmless, right? Not so harmless when you discover the ping pong ball was fired using an explosive chemical reaction created by calcium carbide and water.

Simply mix water with the provided “magic crystals,” load the gun, and you are all set. However, the “magic crystals” turned out to be calcium carbide, a hazardous substance that turns into a highly flammable gas when water hits it. Each time the Austin Magic Pistol was fired, an explosion occurred in the back of the gun.

How our grandparents survived gun shooting ping pong balls launched by chemical explosions, we’ll never know.^[3]

7 Creepy Crawlers

They may have been dangerous, but this entry must have been a blast for kids to create. In 1964, Mattel introduced the Thingmaker. It was so wildly popular they released 15 different sets. The set the internet seems to have the most nostalgia for is the Creepy Crawlers.

The Thingmaker had an oven with an internal heating element that reached 400°F (204°C). The “things” were made by squirting a chemical Mattel called Plasti-Goop into the die-cast metal molds and heating them. However, by 1973, toy safety regulations had become a bit tougher, and the Thingmaker, which heated to high temperatures and used a chemical fluid that gave off fumes, disappeared from store shelves.

In an attempt to revive the beloved toy, Mattel recently tested a version using a 3D printer, but sadly, it never made it to market.^[4]

6 Sixfinger

This entry was marketed for kids who wanted a sixth finger that both wrote and fired a variety of objects, including bombs, missiles, and messages. Created by Topper Toys, it didn’t have the most attractive design, but kids could wear the toy for fun—’cause what’s not fun about another finger on your hand. And the TV commercial even asked how we got along with only five!

Designed in the 1960s by Deluxe Reading, a toy manufacturer based in Elizabeth, NJ. It produced toys under several brand names, including Topper Toys. On their own, the things the Sixfinger does are not super impressive—anyone can use a pen, right? Or play with a cap gun or other toy gun. But combine this with a weird-looking extra finger held between the thumb and forefinger, and it’s a winner, winner, chicken dinner!^[5]

5 Zero-M Sonic Blaster

Here we go with Mattel again. Mattel’s sonic blaster bazooka gun was what every secret agent-wannabe needed in their life. It was a 34-inch-long (86-centimer) blaster that shot hand-pumped compressed air at such high decibels it caused lifelong hearing damage.

You can still see the vintage ad on YouTube today. The commercial features a young Kurt Russell, walking wearily through a black and white world where he must fire his weapon at piles of leaves and wind chimes to survive.

If you’re thinking, what stopped children from shoving things like dirt and rocks into the blaster and launching them into the air? Well, nothing stopped children from doing that. That is exactly the sort of thing that children will do. This, aside from the hearing damage, is one more reason you can’t buy anything like the Zero-M Sonic Blaster for today’s sheltered children.^[6]

4 Clackers

Like many toys from the ’60s and ’70s, Clackers were simple. Two balls were attached to a string that a child could smack together to make a loud and pleasing (at least to the child) sound. Banging two balls together doesn’t sound so bad; however, the original clacker balls were made of glass.

What do you think might happen when a small child wildly and violently bangs glass balls together? As you might expect, the glass shattered, sending dangerous shards in all directions. The Food and Drug Administration banned the toys in 1971, leading Sarah Slobin from Quartz to pen a piece where she argues the outcry over the clackers may have been responsible for “sowing the seeds for the helicopter parenting style of today.”^[7]

3 Zulu Blow Gun

In the 1950s, the Zulu Blow Gun was a favorite among children, allowing them to blow into the gun and launch foam pellets at each other. The problem is when the child sucked in air deeply to be able to blow it out and launch the gun, they sometimes sucked in with the gun to their mouth, launching the pellet directly down their throat rather than into the air.

Blow darts toys are still available today, but modern children are protected from inhaling foam into their lungs by the use of one-way mouthpieces.^[8]

2 Baby Cages

It’s a tough individual indeed who spent their toddlerhood suspended out a 10-story high-rise window inside a metal wire cage. Baby cages were around mainly from the 1920s to the 1950s, and their purpose was to give parents living in small city apartments a chance to provide their children with some fresh air and sunshine.

The interest in baby cages, which were invented by Emma Read in 1922, most likely stemmed from the 1884 book The Care and Feeding of Children. In this book, a section labeled “Airing” recommended that children get fresh air regularly. Amazingly enough, there don’t seem to be any accidents or deaths from baby cages, but you won’t see any babies suspended from high-rise apartments today.^[9]

1 Empire Little Lady Stove

Although many items on this list are in the category of so-called traditional “boy’s toys,” don’t let that lead you to believe that the conventional “girl’s toys” were any less dangerous. The glass-blowing kit may have been deemed “for boys,” but the Empire Little Lady Stove had exposed burners and could reach exceedingly high temperatures of up to 600°F (315°C), proving the girls of this era were just as hardcore.

The Empire Little Lady Stove was a victim of the first federal safety standard for toys. In 1969, the toy was banned by the National Commission on Product Safety.^[10]

If there were something kids in the 1970s through to the early 2000s looked forward to, it was the trip to McDonald’s for a Happy Meal. The scent of the paper wrappers, the conversations, the laughter…

Beyond stuffing ourselves with gloriously greasy chicken nuggets and piping hot fries—without worrying about calories—we looked forward to what cool trinket we’d find inside the cheerful red and yellow box.

Are you smiling yet? Come relive those memories with us as we explore 10 of the most nostalgic McDonald’s Happy Meal toys ever.

10 Grimace, Hamburglar, & Birdie (1979)

Yes, we know, Ronald McDonald always looked like something from a creepy movie, and that cup on his nose… We were definitely relieved when McDonald’s introduced Grimace, the affable monster, Hamburglar, the burger hoarder, and Birdie, the girly early bird, to take the edge off.

The three popular figurines released in 1979 have made a nostalgic comeback targeting adults in 2022 through a limited edition collaboration with Cactus Plant Flea Market. The Adult Happy Meal (aimed at the ’70s and ’80s, well, and maybe ’90s kids) will also include a new figure-Cactus Buddy.

There is an unmistakable twist to these figurines, though. They now spot two sets of eyes, which is creepy, but nothing new if you’re familiar with McDonald’s Happy Meals. Fans who are eager to relive their childhood have come out in droves to snag these meal boxes before it’s too late.

We’re never too old to enjoy a Happy Meal, especially if it includes some of our beloved but mostly forgotten character toys.

9 Hot Wheels (1983)

Back in the day, toy cars were a favorite. We raced them at home, in the car, and just about every place our parents took us. So you can imagine how awesome it felt getting a brand-new toy car for free, along with a delightful lunch.

McDonald’s partnered with Mattel to offer a collection of 14 quality metal cars in different colors and shapes. You could find ambulances, police cars, and race cars to keep you on the fast lane at the restaurant or in your car as you left the drive-thru.

In later years, McDonald’s conjured their own car designs and distributed those instead. These cars were made of cheaper plastic bodies but were cool nonetheless.

If you remember, Happy Meal toys depended on whether you requested “boy” or “girl” toys. The boys got the Hot Wheels cars meal box, while the girls received the Barbie doll meal box. Of course, that has changed now, and kids can choose whatever toy they like.

8 Ghostbusters (1984)

If there’s something strange in your neighborhood… who you gonna call? Who can forget that catchy Ghostbusters theme song? And to imagine that your next meal included all the RGB TV show characters was blissful.

Behold, Staypuft the sharpener, Slimer pencil topper, Ghostbusters pencil, a ghost-shaped notepad, and pencil pouch were just one part. The boxes contained a bonanza of fun-filled games and activities to fill your day.

My favorite Happy Meal Box had an “Ecto’s Defectos” puzzle on one side, and I needed to name everything wrong with Ecto-1. I’m certain we mostly thought about the ghost settled in the driver’s seat, yet the car also had a flat tire, broken light, and a missing door. No, I didn’t forget the busted bumper.

On the other side of the box, the “Bedtime Surprise” activity was the quickest ever. All you needed to do was match the ghosts (all set to surprise our friends) to their slime trails.

The “Total Confusion” puzzle had these distinct-looking but weirdly shaped ghosts trapped in an Ecto-Containment Unit. Your job was to count them, and if you found all 13, hurray.

Last was the Ghostbusted jigsaw puzzle, where Slimer, unfortunately, broke into little pieces thanks to Egon’s ghost net. Reassembling Slimer meant popping out all his parts which caused major damage to your box, but it was worth it.

Other boxes had different activities to keep you delighted as you dug into your deliciously greasy fries.

7 Transformers/My Little Pony (1985)

So back then, a perfect Happy Meal allowed boys to add a Transformer character to their collection while girls could show off their My Little Pony Charms.

Transformers figurines included Cliffjumper, my favorite Bumblebee, Brawn, and Gears, while Blossom, Butterscotch, the all-too-cute Snuzzle, Minty, purple-haired Blue Belle, and Cotton Candy completed the My Little Pony Charms set. The toys were so popular that they spawned addictive animated series and movies.

Moving into 1996, McDonald’s added five different toys to their Transformers Happy Meal line to aggrandize the Beast Wars cartoon. These characters comprised Beetle, MantaRay, Rhino, Panther, and an under-3 toy.

The franchise distributed two meal cardboard boxes—one featured punch-out cards of Optimus Prime and other heroes, while the other box had punch-outs of Megatron and his villain partners.

My Little Pony’s ’97 collection had kids wowed with turnable heads, brushable tails, and intricate decals. While girls mostly clipped the original toys to their back pockets, the design evolved beautifully to make them even more playable toys.

6 Changeables (1987)

With the Transformer toys being such a hit among kids, McDonald’s decided to create its own version: the Changeables.

So what typically passed for an ice cream cone, fries, burgers, Egg McMuffin, Chicken McNuggets, and hotcakes were robots, dinosaurs, and many other creatures. You just needed to unfold these food items, and voila! You’d be off to whatever world-changing rescue mission you imagined.

The ’87 wave of Changeables didn’t have much of a story going, save for a couple of jokes on the box, but McDonald’s did come up with lore in ’89.

The Munchoids (food thieves) were intent on stealing every Happy Meal from Earth. It became the Changeables’ mission to stop them. So, Fry, the robot, had this idea where the Changeables would shrink down to cross the galaxy and arrive on Earth, where they would duplicate themselves so every kid would have one.

And they did just that.

5 Fraggle Rock Toys (1988)

Muppets aside, the Fraggle Rock series was a winner. For an early ’80s musical fantasy show, it was artistic, silly, downright raucous, and appealed to all ages.

McDonald’s saw the opportunity and jumped right in. This particular meal box contained one of four characters: Gobo in an orange carrot car, Mokey doing her thing in a purple eggplant car, Red in a red radish car (red has always been a thing), and the duo Wembley and Boober in a shared green cucumber car. Weird how Boober was facing the wrong way. He probably lost the toss and was mad about it.

With choking possibilities, kids under 3 received Gobo holding a carrot or Red with a radish in his hand.

I always wondered why the Fraggles drove veggie cars. Perhaps, they were trying to inspire us to eat our vegetables. Or were they predicting a future where we would replace our gasoline-powered cars with eco-friendly vegetable-powered ones…?

4 Super Mario Bros. (1990)

By now, the ’70s and ’80s kids were older, Nintendo video games were the thing, and we were gobbling up every available game, including Super Mario Bros. 3.

We weren’t even done talking about the Super Mario Bros. 3 game when McDonald’s introduced its characters. Our interest in getting these toys was beyond casual; it was absolute—like we had to get those characters.

The original set comprised four characters, well, five if you count the stoic Racoon Mario designed purely for younger kids. Jumping Mario had this spring-loaded doohickey that let him fly while Luigi held on to a starman as he sat on his pull-back cloud car. A bouncing Koopa Paratroopa and somersaulting Little Goomba rounded things off.

We all had a favorite figure, but there really wasn’t a bad one. You just needed to figure out how to work them into your action figure adventures without them jumping off and away.

3 Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers (1995)

McDonald’s has never shied from partnering with popular TV shows or movies, so it was an absolute thrill when they released MMPR Happy Meal toys just as the MMPR movie premiered.

Lunch or dinner now included cool Power Ranger devices like the “Power Siren” and “Alien Detectors.” You could also chance upon the “Power Com,” or if you were lucky, the “PowerMorpher Buckle.”

The actual Power Ranger figurines, complete with Zord merch, were available at McDonald’s, but you purchased them separately. These figurines were pretty well made (even by today’s standards) and resembled their TV counterparts. The perfect collection for kids in the ‘90s.

2 Teenie Beanie Babies (1997)

We remember the Beanie Babies craze more than we do the toys. Or maybe we remember everything and still have our favorite collection tucked somewhere in the back of the closet or the attic.

Those squishy, cuddly, irresistibly adorable bean-filled toys had kids, parents, and grandparents clamoring for one or all of them. It was so bad that fights even broke out at multiple McDonald’s locations.

McDonald’s partnership with Ty Inc. was such that new beanies would be introduced yearly at the former’s locations until 2000.

The 1997 set contained 10 Beanies that included Patti platypus, Chops the lamb (I doubt that name would fly today), Pinky flamingo, Chocolate moose, Snort the bull, Goldie goldfish, Seamore the seal, Speedy turtle, Quacks the duck, and Lizz lizard.

While we all had our favorites, popular Beanies in the 1998 set included Doby dog, Inch Worm, Pinchers Lobster, and Bongo monkey. And 1999 saw Freckles the leopard warm our hearts along with Chip the cat, Strut Rooster, and Nuts squirrel.

If you were still interested in Happy Meal Beanies, you found that the critters were now grouped as “Pet Pals,” “Garden Bunch,” “At the Zoo,” and “Under the Sea.” And let’s not forget Libearty Bear.

So even though the internet screams about the “worthlessness” of these pocket-sized Beanie babies today, we know that they hold an invaluable spot in our hearts.

1 Mini Furbies (1999)

Furby toys were an overnight sensation in the ‘90s, and McDonald’s jumped on the bandwagon by creating Mini Furbies for their Happy Meals.

McDonald’s tweaked the original toys’ design, so their eyes didn’t stare at you creepily. Yup, Mini Furbies blinked and could move their ears. Still, their eyes were gigantically creepy (there’s no moving away from that), and their ears remained batlike. At least the Mini Furbies didn’t talk to you in the middle of the night (unlike their larger cousins), or you would have blasted through the walls in fright.

Perhaps the “horror feel” they inspired in us drew us to them… I wonder if they have been spying on us all this time and will wake up one day and take over the world…

Anyway, the 1999 figures were 80 in total. So if you were a die-hard fan, you probably went in search of all eight series that contained ten mini Furbies each.

In 2000, McDonald’s introduced 12 mini Furby stuffed keychains based on the 1998 Furby toys. Okay, so maybe these didn’t look too shabby, and they had names too if you can recall—Diamondback Snake, Elephant, Cow, Lamb, Giraffe, Tiger, Fox, Raccoon, Monkey, Owl, Tree Frog, and Dinosaur.