Barbershops have a rich history. This was particularly true ages ago when surgery, bloodletting, enemas, and tooth extractions were part of the norm (in addition to fresh shaves).

In our day and age, such establishments often serve as a locale for social interaction pertaining to contemporary issues. The following list examines barbers who traded in their shears for unspeakable acts of violence as well as unscrupulous patrons on a downward spiral of lunacy.

10 Contaminated Tools

On a daily basis, hundreds of citizens throughout India are unknowingly exposing themselves to serious infections like AIDS and hepatitis B and C via unsanitary roadside barbers. In a country where there is no system or organization to check safety protocols, thousands of barbers use just one razor or blade on a large number of customers.

At railway stations, bus stands, and even government hospitals, infected razors are continuously being used without the slightest bit of concern from the barber or the client receiving a shave. Upon questioning one barber about his knowledge pertaining to the transmission of HIV and AIDS, he erroneously responded by saying, “These things happen because of wrong acts and not because of shaving. If we will think that much, what will we eat.”

Nigeria has also seen its share of unsanitary barber practices. According to a recent study, a majority of professional barbers in the African nation serve as a potential core group for indirect HIV transmission “through the use of non-potent disinfectants and improper handling of sharp instruments.”^[1]

Case in point: The study found that kerosene has become a popular disinfectant on barbers’ instruments even though the solvent cannot inactivate HIV or other infectious diseases. This renders its use a mere senseless placebo.

9 Barbie Barber

Australia’s famed adult nightclub, The Vault On Ruthven, recently underwent a $2.5 million makeover on a new and improved interior that was once home to the Commonwealth Bank. Much of the construction expense went into transforming the old bank vault into an unexpected attraction—a nude barbershop.

For voyeur gentlemen seeking a fresh shave or cut, they now have the unusual luxury of being snipped and trimmed by Breanna Francis (aka “Barbie Barber”). The corset-wearing, topless hairdresser prides herself on her work and states, “I get a lot more money doing this than just hairdressing and more money than I would just stripping.”

Interestingly enough, the barbershop—just like the entirety of the strip club—is upper echelon in terms of class as opposed to the expected, seedy appearance that one might expect. In fact, the owners have taken great pride in the newly transformed vault. It is rightfully named “Don’s Barbershop,” an ode to the foreman who oversaw the entire construction.

Sadly, Don kicked the bucket prior to completion of the nude barbershop that he so proudly envisioned. In his honor, a grandiose plaque outside the door of the risque establishment has the inscription, “established 1937,” a creepy reminder of the year that Don was born.^[2]

8 Degenerate Barber

What was supposed to be a typical trim in a Spring, Texas, barbershop took an unexpected turn into perversion in August 2017. An unidentified mother was silently questioning why her children’s barber, 32-year-old Jeremiah Siqueido, was incessantly excusing himself to go to the back room of the shop.

Though one could simply assume that Siqueido had irregular bowel movements, the frequent breaks became not only a nuisance but oddly troublesome for the young mother of three. As she followed him to the rear of the store, the mother’s unremitting sixth sense was visually confirmed. Siqueido was caught with his pants down, masturbating while staring at her children from the shadows of the room.

“She was very, very explicit with what she saw with both of his hands and where they were positioned and what she actually saw. That was a big factor in our DA taking charges,” explained Harris County Constable Mark Herman following Siqueido’s arrest for indecent exposure.

It may come as no surprise that the child predator has had previous run-ins with the law. A decade earlier, Siqueido was sentenced to five years in prison after he poured boiling hot water on a two-year-old child. The young girl, whose mother was dating Siqueido at the time, suffered “third-degree burns from head to toe all over her body.”^[3]

To date, the sick and twisted barber awaits trial while being held on a $5,000 bond.

7 A Bad Day At The Office

The last thing expected by Ismael Dushan when he entered Levels Barbershop in Brooklyn in May 2018 was that he would be leaving the establishment in an ambulance. Tensions arouse mid-cut when Dushan began to complain about the trim he was receiving. The 33-year-old also refused to leave a tip, which further enraged his barber.

While his customer’s back was turned, the irascible coiffeur shoved the patron with such force that he was launched through the front window of the shop. Seeing that his customer’s face was now ripped opened by shards of glass, the devious stylist chose not to wait around for police questioning.

Interestingly enough, not a single employee at Levels could recall the barber’s name or how to reach him even though he had been employed at the barbershop for some time. To date, the fiery Brooklyn barber remains at large.^[4]

In spite of such injurious rage in Brooklyn, nothing compares to the ire of a Queens barber who used his scissors as a tool for murder. Following a scuffle that broke out at Select Stylez, 34-year-old Cedric Simpson repeatedly plunged his shears into the stomach of 19-year-old Carl Richardson in 2014.

According to police reports, Simpson became incensed after Richardson, a regular customer, inquired about a $50 debt that the barber owed him. Simpson was formally charged with murder after it was announced that Richardson was pronounced dead on arrival at Franklin General Hospital.

6 Buckets Of Urine

In the Emabutweni suburb of Bulawayo, Zimbabwe, sits a barbershop whose owner had quite a peculiar dilemma on his hands. For months, barber Mgadi Ndlovu had been robbed of his peace as well as his clientele, all thanks to welder Khumbulani Ndlovu who worked nearby.

For reasons that are unclear, Khumbulani developed a penchant for entering Mgadi’s shop with the sole purpose of urinating on anything and everything, including the barber’s tools. Mgadi said:

He sometimes comes to my workplace just to urinate in my shop. Whenever I ask him why he is behaving in such a manner, he would then start shouting and insulting me using vulgar language. At one time, he even came to the shop and took one of the buckets which we use for other purposes and urinated inside. When I asked him why he was doing that, he threatened to splash me with urine.

After countless golden drenches turned the barbershop into an odorous nightmare reminiscent of a nursing home, Mgadi decided to take Khumbulani to court. Citing a loss of customers due to the welder’s bizarre antics, Mgadi also claimed that Khumbulani made several unspecified threats against his life.

As expected, Khumbulani was arrested and made to pay a fine with the understanding that he must not communicate with or threaten Mgadi or enter Mgadi’s place of work. Khumbulani was also stripped of all barbershop bathroom privileges.^[5]

5 When You Gotta Go

On a quiet Wednesday afternoon in Columbus, Georgia, in 2016, customers at the Victory Barber Shop got more than they bargained for when Kenyatta Samar Griffin casually strolled into view. Standing in front of the window where he could be seen clearly by the shop’s clients, the 42-year-old calmly dropped his pants, exposed himself, and proceeded to defecate all over the sidewalk.

When he was done relieving himself, Griffin pulled up his pants and carried on with his day. An officer on routine patrol who had witnessed Griffin’s fecal work of art immediately arrested the inebriated man for public indecency. When questioned about the poop-covered sidewalk, Griffin claimed that the feces belonged to someone else.^[6]

If that wasn’t enough to turn one’s stomach, an unsatisfied customer in Shandong, China, expressed his disdain toward his barber in the most romantic way—by throwing bags of feces at the barbershop’s door. The odoriferous hobby became a daily ritual for the rancorous nuisance who was eventually tracked down after police viewed the shop’s surveillance tape.

In the end, the man was fined 500 yuan for his poop-flinging adventures and sentenced to nine days in “detention.”

4 Smokey Was Smoked

A long-running feud between an antagonistic resident, Heather Lemieux, and William Whitson of Smooth Cuts Barber Shop viciously spilled out into a Massachusetts street in 2015. After months of shouting matches, Lemieux carelessly continued her deliberate provocation of parading her pit bull, Smokey, around Whitson’s shop despite his pleas to stop.

One afternoon, however, Lemieux’s antagonistic ways came full circle when her intimidating four-legged friend attacked a smaller dog in front of Whitson’s barbershop. As the small dog’s owner cried for help, Whitson sprang into action. In spite of restraining Smokey by placing him in a headlock, the barber took his gallant efforts a step further and began stabbing the dog in the shoulder, neck, and chest as if he were slaying a werewolf.

Upon questioning, Whitson claimed that the pit bull bit his right hand and would not let go, prompting the stabbing in self-defense. Nonetheless, authorities rejected his narrative and charged him with animal cruelty and assault with a dangerous weapon. They also issued a temporary order of suspension for his master barber license.^[7]

Court records indicate that Whitson, a registered Level 3 sex offender, had a history of complaints pertaining to late-night disturbances outside his local barbershop. After serving 21 months and four days, he was released from prison still irked about his unjust sentence.

3 Temperamental Patrons And Barbers

Desiring to look prim and proper for the holidays, a 22-year-old man in Madison, Wisconsin, stopped by Ruby’s Salon for a haircut. During the cut, however, the unidentified customer kept “fidgeting” in his seat and moving his head, which caused great aggravation for the barber and owner, Khaled A. Shabani.

As opposed to voicing his annoyance like a sane individual, Shabani did what any frustrated lunatic holding shears would do. He twisted the man’s ear and then “snipped” off the tip.

With the customer in a state of shock and confusion, Shabani used clippers to shave off a strip of hair down the center of the man’s head. Authorities arrested Shabani on charges of mayhem and disorderly conduct while armed. They also stated that the botched haircut left the man “looking a bit like Larry from The Three Stooges.”^[8]

Such insanity pales in comparison to the wrath of 40-year-old Trenton barber James Dillard. While Dillard cut the hair of a client, the two men began to argue, prompting the customer to end the session early.

As opposed to leaving in a relatively civilized manner, the unidentified patron slammed the front door to the Beauty and the Beast Barber Shop, causing the glass to shatter. In response, Dillard confronted the man in the street, where a struggle ensued.

In the heat of the moment, the barber channeled his inner Mike Tyson and bit the 24-year-old man’s ear in half. In the end, the customer was rushed to a hospital while Dillard was jailed on charges of aggravated assault.

2 Demon Barber

Lloyd Dobrodumow, the owner of Jack’s barbershop, is quite the peculiar fellow who proudly touts himself as “The Demon Barber.” Inspired by the popular musical, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street, Dobrodumow’s fascination with the barbarous character became all too real for horrified Newcastle residents who witnessed a man burst out of the barbershop with his throat slit.

By all appearances, it seemed as if detectives had an open-and-shut case. Dobrodumow, who has a history of domestic violence and 17 convictions, was booked on one charge of wounding with intent to commit grievous bodily harm. Much to the surprise of mortified residents, further investigation revealed that the victim, Robert Smith, was the instigator.

According to reports, a fight broke out between the two men after a belligerent Smith began throwing beer cans at Dobrodumow. Smith also threatened to kill Dobrodumow and steal his dog. Then Smith called Dobrodumow’s wife a “slut.”

The barber threw a punch, not realizing that he was still holding a razor in his hand. Despite a 10-centimeter (4 in) wound to Smith’s throat that severed a main muscle and a saliva gland, witnesses reported that Smith began demanding £10,000 to “make it all go away.”

At Dobrodumow’s trial, Judge Tom Little stated that Dobrodumow had shown “genuine, tearful remorse” and believed the injury was not intentional. The Demon Barber was subsequently given a 12-month suspended sentence and ordered to pay £5,000 in compensation.^[9]

1 Revenge

On the night of February 5, 2015, a man wearing a black hooded sweatshirt walked into a packed barbershop in Warrensville Heights, Ohio, and carried out a horrific massacre that spawned a series of revenge killings. On the orders of heroin kingpin Tevaughn “Big Baby” Darling, Douglas Shine Jr. opened fire with two handguns inside Chalk Linez barbershop.^[10]

Shine shot Walter Barfield 19 times, including two execution-style shots to his skull. Lying dead in a pool of blood beside Barfield, who was the target of the massacre, was Brandon White and barber William Gonzalez, an innocent bystander who was gunned down beside his barber’s chair.

In the months that followed, a series of revenge shootings were carried out throughout Ohio. One of the perpetrators of the killing spree was 24-year-old Marcus Ladson, who executed Curtis Avent III outside a bar merely weeks after the Chalk Linez shooting.

Ladson, whose cousin Brandon had been murdered at the barbershop, mercilessly continued exacting revenge on anyone believed to have been a conspirator in the massacre. After being arrested red-handed at the scene of his last shooting, Ladson was found guilty of murder and 25 other felonies. He was sentenced to 127 years to life in prison.

Douglas Shine Jr., who carried out the triple homicide, was convicted of aggravated murder and other charges and sentenced to life in prison without parole. Meanwhile, “Big Baby” Darling, the man who orchestrated the barbershop killing, is currently serving a 14-year sentence on drug charges. Chalk Linez barbershop never reopened.

Adam is just a hubcap trying to hold on in the fast lane.

When you think of the words “illusion” and “hallucination,” you may think of a crazy person seeing something that isn’t there. But there are many more types that are not discussed as frequently. You don’t need to be crazy to experience illusions and hallucinations, and many of them are not things that are seen.

Both illusions and hallucinations are types of distortions of reality, but an illusion is a distortion of something that really exists, while a hallucination is a distortion of something that isn’t real. Let’s explore the unbelievable world of illusions and hallucinations in some of their many forms.

10 Environmental Tilt

For people who experience this illusion, their world is turned upside down. Or, at least, their visual perception of the world is greatly tilted, such that the direction of “up” has moved somewhere else. This environmental tilt usually is perceived as a 90-degree or a 180-degree tilt, meaning that up could become right, left, or down. There are other, even rarer, cases in which up becomes forward or the tilt is at a more unusual rotation, such as 30 or 150 degrees.

Environmental tilt typically appears rather suddenly, and the illusion can last anywhere from a few seconds to around an hour. During these episodes, people report feeling dizzy, which isn’t all that surprising considering the disagreement between what they are seeing and their sense of balance.

One woman reported having very sudden tilts in her vision lasting around a second each time. One of her sudden tilts caused her to lose control of her car temporarily. Her tilts varied in degrees, including 45, 90, and 180-degree tilts. According to her case study, the rotations were in a clockwise direction when they happened slowly enough for her to see.

Many different problems can lead to the experience of environmental tilt, including strokes, migraines, and traumatic brain injuries. Sometimes, this illusion is triggered by patients moving their heads, as a sort of super-vertigo. Many patients found that the best treatment was to simply close their eyes until their normal vision was reset.^[1]

9 Charles Bonnet Syndrome

In 2016, an 81-year-old woman developed some unusual problems with her vision. Specifically, she frequently hallucinated visits by pigeons in the early evening hours. She did not have any pathological mental problems—she was entirely sane—but she did have age-related vision loss. Her hallucinations were initially rare but later increased to an occurrence nearly every day. Doctors diagnosed her with Charles Bonnet syndrome.

In vision loss, the eye receives less input from the outside world, and it sends less information to the brain as a result. But brain cells are hungry for action. Neurons in the visual centers in the brain try to do their jobs anyway by changing the way that they respond to the diminished incoming signals. The cells can become more sensitive to incoming signals or generate their own. These changes can lead to Charles Bonnet Syndrome, in which a person hallucinates images in their blind spots.

In other words, because your brain cells in your visual centers don’t know what is in your blind spots, they make things up. This increase in visual center brain activity despite a decrease in visual input from the eyes is called the “deafferentation theory.” Evidence for this theory comes from brain scans that show increased brain activity in the visual centers of people with Charles Bonnet syndrome.

The hallucinations associated with Charles Bonnet syndrome usually last only minutes, but they can last for hours. The images often have moving parts, are in full color, and are often of people or geometric patterns. These images are almost always silent, and while patients have reported feeling confused by the hallucinations, they eventually become comfortable with them, realizing that they are not real.^[2]

8 Chromatopsia

Colors are made in your brain. All that really exists outside your head are different wavelengths of light, bouncing off objects without a care as to what they might look like. It is entirely up to you to turn that light into colors. One common disorder of color is color blindness, in which certain wavelengths of light cannot be told apart. However, there are more mysterious disorders of color too, such as chromatopsia, the disorder that puts color where it doesn’t belong.

The word “chromatopsia” can apply to several specific distortions, including both illusions and hallucinations. On the illusion side of the spectrum is the type of chromatopsia often affiliated with migraine headaches, in which a person sees more color than what is truly present. It’s as if someone has turned up the color setting on your computer monitor, except in real life.

But on the hallucination side of chromatopsia, people experience seeing colors where they do not belong. In other words, colorless objects can suddenly take on colorful appearances, or a person’s entire field of view can change in perceived hue. There are specific names for each color that might permeate your vision in an episode of hallucinatory chromatopsia. Blue vision is called cyanopsia, yellow vision is called xanthopsia, and red vision is called erythropsia. There are also terms for purple vision (ianothinopsia) and green vision (chloropsia), as well as a term for when all color vanishes from your vision, which is called achromatopsia.^[3]

7 Macropsia And Micropsia

The ability to tell how large something is when looking at it isn’t as straightforward as it seems. Figuring out the size of something requires a complicated process that considers both information from your eyes as well as information already in your brain. These are bottom-up and top-down processes, respectively. These two processes work together, for example, to help you figure out how tall someone is based on what other objects are near the person. We take this complicated operation for granted until it stops working.

Two illusions of mistaking the size of objects are called macropsia and micropsia. Respectively, they are perceiving things as being too big or too small. Essentially, people get the feeling that things they are looking at are larger or smaller than they are supposed to be. Both of these conditions are affiliated with an overall syndrome called Alice in Wonderland Syndrome due to how, like in the book Alice in Wonderland, things appear to shift sizes. In Alice in Wonderland Syndrome, around 45 percent of people experience macropsia, and around 59 percent experience micropsia.

The good thing about these illusions is that they are usually temporary, lasting only minutes in some cases. Many cases of macropsia and micropsia occur in children who get headaches, especially migraines.^[4]

One 12-year-old reported multiple episodes of micropsia each day, and doctors were able to scan his brain using fMRI during one of his episodes. The results showed that the part of the brain that is responsible for processing vision was less active than normal. While this didn’t explain what specifically caused the illusions, it did show that his brain was behaving unusually.

6 Exploding Head Syndrome

Falling asleep is supposed to be a peaceful transition, but not so for people with exploding head syndrome. People with this condition occasionally experience disruptions while falling asleep or waking up in the form of hallucinations. Specifically, they hear a loud explosion noise in their head that shocks them awake. This explosion noise is usually accompanied by fear, but it is not painful.

While many people with this disorder have only a few episodes, there are reports of some sufferers experiencing multiple episodes in the course of a single night of sleep. In addition to the explosion sound, some people also experience flashes of light or slight body convulsions. The number of people with this disorder is not known, but it appears to be more common than originally thought when it was first discovered.

The noise itself sounds a bit different depending on the person. People have described it as lightning cracks, buzzing, fireworks, gunshots, beeps, and other sounds. While many people with this condition worry that the symptoms indicate some other, more serious problem, researchers of this disorder have described the condition as harmless. Because this syndrome is not yet well-understood, there are not a lot of known treatments, and researchers often recommend simple reassurance of the patient that the disorder will not harm them in order to reduce their anxiety about the attacks.^[5]

5 Gustatory Hallucinations

If any of these illusions or hallucinations are going to leave you with a bad taste in your mouth, it will probably be gustatory hallucinations. Some people can imagine tastes when they want to, but it is a different situation when a person hallucinates a taste in their mouth that they cannot control. Hallucinated tastes are called gustatory hallucinations.

Unfortunately, most cases of gustatory hallucinations are of unpleasant tastes, including descriptions of rotten apples, stale cigarettes, rusty iron, or tastes simply described as bitter or unpleasant. Reports of pleasant tastes are quite rare, but accounts of generally sweet tastes or of specific foods, such as grilled peanuts or garlic, do exist. Some of the more unusual hallucinated tastes reported include sperm, charcoal, and chloroform.

A person can have a hallucination pertaining to any of their senses, including the main five senses of seeing, hearing, smelling, touching, and taste. Of these, hallucinations of taste seem to be the rarest in psychiatric disorders. Schizophrenia is often coupled with hallucinations, and for schizophrenics, gustatory hallucinations take a distant last place in terms of the five main senses. It is not known why these hallucinations are rarer than other sensory hallucinations, but researchers have found that the different types of sensory hallucinations are correlated. In other words, if you have one type of hallucination, you are more likely to have another type as well.^[6]

4 Olfactisms And Odor-Color Synesthesia

There are groups of people who experience strange mixed perceptions of the world thanks to a condition called synesthesia. This condition describes a person who experiences perceptions that are involuntarily linked together, such as words and tastes or letters and colors.

One of the more rare experiences of synesthesia is sometimes called an olfactism, wherein a hallucinated smell is triggered by some other sensation that a person receives. For example, imagine that each time you hear the name “Andrew,” you smell rotten eggs. There are multiple types of olfactisms. They can be triggered by seeing certain lights, touching different textures, and even fluctuations in temperature.

However, the hallucination often works in the opposite direction, with the smell triggering the hallucination rather than being the subject of it. One type of synesthesia is where smells cause the seeing of colors. This is called odor-color synesthesia. The smells and colors are often closely attached to one another, meaning that the person will see a specific color when they smell a specific scent, but these associations sometimes change over time. Interestingly, people with this condition are superior both at recognizing colors and distinguishing smells compared to the average person.

In odor-color synesthesia, there may be specific smells that cause the person to experience intense colors. Some of the odors reported to trigger strong colors include animals, food, and household chemicals. The associations between the smells and the colors perceived do not necessarily align as expected. For example, smelling a banana could lead to a vivid perception of pink rather than yellow.^[7]

3 Hallucinatory Halitosis

Halitosis means “bad breath,” and it is something that people are often self-conscious about, prompting them to freshen their breath with mints or gum. But sometimes, a person may perceive that they have bad breath when, in fact, the smell is all in their head. There are people who so strongly believe that their breath is bad that it disrupts the normal function of their lives. This condition is called hallucinatory halitosis or sometimes delusional halitosis. These names for the disorder appear interchangeable, but there is a small difference.

In hallucinatory halitosis, it is required that the sufferer actually experiences the bad smell that does not exist, while in delusional halitosis, the sufferer does not need to report having smelled this bad smell. It is sometimes unclear which term better applies because the sufferer is the only one who is able to report the possible hallucination.

Many people with this condition seek out medical treatment to improve the smell of their breath. In fact, some people with this disorder become so obsessed with finding a cure for their nonexistent bad breath that they search incessantly for medical specialists to fix them. Dentists or other doctors cannot help, of course, because there is no smell for them to fix. Patients with hallucinatory halitosis who are told by a dentist that their breath is fine often express that they would rather visit a “better dentist” than visit a psychiatrist to treat the delusion.^[8]

2 Ictal And Postictal Religious Experiences

While it may not be surprising that some hallucinations have a religious feel to them, what may be surprising is that there are people who experience religious hallucinations due to epileptic seizures. In other words, they have strange feelings of religiosity, mysticism, or spirituality while they are experiencing a seizure or afterward. This disorder is usually affiliated with partial seizures of the temporal lobe of the brain.

What this experience feels like differs depending on the person, but it is often described as a feeling of connectedness to the universe. These seizures are closely related to the kind that cause feelings of joy or pleasure. The mystical experiences themselves may involve sensory hallucinations, such as hearing voices believed to be divine, seeing religious figures, or feeling a presence.

When the spiritual feelings occur during the epileptic episode itself, it is called an ictal religious experience. These ictal experiences typically last for a few seconds or minutes. In contrast are postictal religious experiences, which occur following an epileptic episode and can last much longer, such as hours or days.^[9] These postictal religious experiences have been responsible for converting people to religions suddenly, due to the intensity of the experience.

In 1955, one man, after having an unusually depressing week, had a seizure that filled him with feelings of bliss and religious certainty. Later in life, he had another series of seizures which caused him to lose his new faith, but he did not lose his optimistic outlook on life. This set of two conversions in one person shows that hallucinations can be powerful enough to convince us of anything.

1 Supernumerary Phantom Body Parts

Have you ever thought about fictional characters with strange bodies and how it must feel to have wings, or a tail, or extra arms? Well, for some folk, they don’t need to wonder about that last one. Supernumerary phantom body parts are the result of an unusual disorder wherein a person has a hallucination of the awareness of possessing additional body parts that do not actually exist. Commonly, these body parts are hands or feet, but they can be other parts too, including eyes or entire heads.^[10]

How is this possible? Your brain is responsible for interpreting sensory information that it receives from your body, such as when something touches you. It is also responsible for sending out information, such as telling your hand to move. What the brain must do with this incoming and outgoing information is assign it to a place on your body so that you can determine where you were touched or what body part is moving. But sometimes, often due to brain damage, the brain gets confused and creates categories of body parts that do not actually exist. Someone with supernumerary phantom body parts can actually feel those imaginary body parts being touched and moving, similar to the way that the average person feels their real limbs.

People with this disorder do not actually believe that they have extra body parts; they merely feel as if they have them and are not delusional—if a person truly believes they have extra body parts, then that is called delusional reduplication of body parts instead. Some people with this disorder report being able to feel objects with their phantom limbs in unusual hallucinations of touch, and some also hallucinate being able to see their phantom body parts.

Alexander R. Toftness runs a science and history channel at https://www.youtube.com/artexplains and can be found on Twitter @ARTexplains for more strange facts.

Zombies have been a staple in pop culture for decades, captivating audiences with their eerie presence and relentless pursuit of the living. From classic literature to blockbuster movies and TV series, these undead creatures have undergone numerous transformations, each bringing a unique twist to the genre. The concept of zombies has evolved significantly, reflecting societal fears and fascinations of different eras. Whether slow and shambling or fast and ferocious, each type of zombie offers a different perspective on the undead phenomenon.

Related: Top 10 Ridiculous Movie Monsters

10 Classic Zombies (Night of the Living Dead, 1968)

The archetypal slow-moving, flesh-eating zombies that we associate with classic horror films were first popularized by George A. Romero’s seminal 1968 film Night of the Living Dead. This film set the standard for zombie characteristics that would dominate pop culture for decades. In the movie, the reanimated corpses are driven by an insatiable hunger for human flesh, and they can only be stopped by destroying the brain, typically through a gunshot to the head. These zombies move slowly and exhibit limited cognitive abilities, making them a relentless but manageable threat.

Romero’s creation was groundbreaking not only for its portrayal of zombies but also for its social and political undertones. The film was released during a tumultuous time in American history, and many critics and scholars interpret it as a commentary on contemporary social issues such as racism, the Vietnam War, and the breakdown of societal norms.

The lead character, Ben, played by Duane Jones, is an African American man who takes charge and becomes a hero, a bold choice given the racial tensions of the era. The film’s ending, which sees Ben survive the zombie onslaught only to be mistaken for a zombie and killed by a posse of armed white men, has been interpreted as a powerful statement on racial violence and injustice.^[1]

9 Rage Zombies (28 Days Later, 2002)

In Danny Boyle’s critically acclaimed film 28 Days Later, the concept of zombies was reinvented with the introduction of the “rage virus.” Unlike traditional zombies, often portrayed as slow and lumbering, the infected in 28 Days Later are characterized by their terrifying speed, aggression, and bloodlust.

The rage virus is depicted as a highly contagious pathogen that spreads through bodily fluids, turning victims into rabid, homicidal maniacs within seconds of exposure. This depiction added a new level of intensity and horror to the zombie genre, as the infected were not just relentless but also physically overpowering and alarmingly quick.

The rage virus itself is a product of scientific experimentation gone awry, a theme that taps into contemporary anxieties about biotechnology and its potential dangers. In the film, animal rights activists inadvertently release chimpanzees infected with the virus from a research lab, triggering the outbreak. This origin story is a stark departure from the supernatural or unexplained origins of traditional zombies, grounding the horror in a scenario that feels plausible and contemporary.

The film’s influence is evident in later works like World War Z and the Resident Evil series, where speed and ferocity became defining characteristics of the undead. Additionally, the rage zombies’ focus on a biological and scientific explanation for their condition has become a popular theme, reflecting societal fears about viral outbreaks and the potential consequences of scientific arrogance.^[2]

8 Voodoo Zombies (White Zombie, 1932)

The concept of “Voodoo” zombies originates from Haitian folklore, where it is believed that a sorcerer, known as a bokor, has the power to reanimate the dead and control them as slaves. This practice is rooted in the Vodou religion, a syncretic belief system that combines elements of African, Catholic, and indigenous Taíno traditions. Vodou zombies are distinct from the flesh-eating undead popularized in modern Western media; instead, they are often depicted as lifeless bodies devoid of free will, serving the whims of the bokor who reanimated them.

The 1932 film White Zombie, directed by Victor Halperin, is considered the first feature-length zombie film and introduced the Voodoo zombie to American audiences. Starring Bela Lugosi as the sinister bokor, Murder Legendre, the film tells the story of a young woman who is transformed into a zombie to serve the will of a jealous plantation owner. White Zombie set the stage for the portrayal of zombies in Western cinema, emphasizing the themes of mind control and enslavement rather than the cannibalistic traits seen in later interpretations.

While White Zombie and similar films brought the concept of Voodoo zombies into the cultural mainstream, they often did so through a lens of misunderstanding and exoticism. These portrayals frequently misrepresented Haitian Vodou practices, contributing to stereotypes and negative perceptions of the religion. Despite these issues, the Voodoo zombie remains an iconic figure in horror fiction, influencing countless books, movies, and television shows.^[3]

7 Viral Zombies (Resident Evil, 1996)

The viral zombies from the Resident Evil franchise are among the most iconic in pop culture, largely due to their terrifying origin and the expansive universe in which they exist. Unlike the rage zombies that are living humans driven mad by a virus, the Resident Evil zombies are reanimated corpses infected by a bioweapon. The zombies in Resident Evil result from the T-virus, a genetically engineered pathogen created by the sinister Umbrella Corporation.

The T-virus was initially developed for medical purposes, intended to rejuvenate dead cells and extend life. However, it quickly became a weapon of bioterrorism, turning humans into mindless, flesh-eating creatures. These zombies are distinguished by their grotesque appearances, with rotting flesh and a relentless drive to spread the infection further.

What makes the T-virus zombies particularly frightening is the science behind them, which blends plausible genetic manipulation with pure horror fiction. In the Resident Evil universe, the T-virus not only reanimates dead tissue but also causes mutations that enhance the infected’s physical abilities. This leads to various forms of monsters and mutants, each more horrifying than the last.

The virus’s rapid mutation rate makes it nearly impossible to contain, spreading through bites, scratches, and even airborne particles in some instances. The impact of Resident Evil on zombie lore extends beyond video games into movies, novels, and comic books, significantly shaping modern perceptions of zombies.^[4]

6 Reanimated Corpses (Pet Sematary, 1983)

Pet Sematary, a 1983 novel by Stephen King later adapted into a film in 1989, explores the dark consequences of resurrection. The story revolves around Dr. Louis Creed and his family, who move to a rural home in Maine. Nearby is a mysterious burial ground, known to the locals as the “Pet Sematary,” where buried animals come back to life. The novel delves into themes of grief, loss, and the natural order of life and death.

However, the resurrection in Pet Sematary is not a gentle return to life; instead, it is a malevolent and twisted reanimation that brings the dead back as dangerous and violent beings. The reanimated creatures in Pet Sematary are driven by an unseen, sinister force that alters their personalities. Unlike classic zombies that arise from an unknown, possibly scientific phenomenon, the reanimated corpses in Pet Sematary come from a supernatural place.

Dr. Creed first discovers the power of the burial ground when his daughter’s cat, Church, is killed. Despite being skeptical, Dr. Creed buries the cat in the pet cemetery at the advice of his neighbor. Church returns, but it is clear that something is deeply wrong with him—he becomes aggressive and emits a foul odor, indicating that his resurrection has brought him back in a corrupted form. This sets the stage for the later, more tragic use of the burial ground when Creed’s young son, Gage, is killed in an accident.

The horror intensifies when Creed, overwhelmed by grief, decides to bury Gage in the “Pet Sematary” despite the neighbor’s warnings about human resurrections. Gage’s return is far more horrific than Church’s; he comes back as a malevolent entity with a penchant for violence, leading to a series of deadly events.^[5]

5 Plant Zombies (The Last of Us, 2013)

In The Last of Us, a critically acclaimed video game developed by Naughty Dog, the concept of zombies is uniquely reimagined through the lens of a fungal infection. The game introduces the Cordyceps Brain Infection (CBI), a mutated strain of the real-life Cordyceps fungus that typically affects insects.

In the game, this fungus infects humans, turning them into grotesque, zombie-like creatures. The infection spreads through spore inhalation and bites, leading to a rapid and terrifying transformation. The infected exhibit various stages of mutation, each more horrifying than the last, from Runners and Stalkers to the more advanced Clickers and Bloaters.

The game’s depiction of these plant zombies, particularly the Clickers, is both innovative and unsettling. Clickers are named for the echolocation-like clicking sounds they make due to their blindness, a result of the fungus consuming their faces. This use of sound to navigate makes them eerily reminiscent of certain real-world bats. It adds an extra layer of horror as players must remain silent to avoid detection.

The Last of Us received widespread praise for its storyline, character development, and the originality of its infected enemies. This concept was explored further in the game’s sequel, The Last of Us Part II, and adapted into an HBO series.^[6]

4 Nazi Zombies (Dead Snow, 2009)

Dead Snow is a Norwegian horror-comedy film that introduces a chilling and unique twist on the zombie genre by featuring Nazi zombies. Directed by Tommy Wirkola, the film revolves around a group of medical students on a skiing vacation in Norway who accidentally awaken a battalion of Nazi soldiers that were buried in the snow during World War II.

These zombies are not just mindless creatures; they are driven by a specific purpose and are organized, retaining some of their militaristic discipline and strategies from their days as soldiers. The Nazi zombies in Dead Snow are particularly scary due to their combination of undead resilience and strategic cunning. Unlike traditional zombies that wander aimlessly, these zombies pursue their goals with military precision. They are led by their former commander, who directs their actions and orchestrates attacks against the living.

This militaristic organization sets them apart from other zombie depictions in pop culture, where zombies are often portrayed as mindless hordes. The film cleverly uses the Nazi aspect to heighten the horror, playing on the historical atrocities committed by the Nazis to add an extra layer of evil to the antagonists. Dead Snow has earned a cult following and is celebrated for its originality, dark humor, and inventive take on the zombie genre.^[7]

3 Alien Zombies (Plan 9 from Outer Space, 1959)

In Ed Wood’s 1959 cult classic Plan 9 from Outer Space, alien zombies play a central role in the film’s bizarre plot. The movie, often labeled as one of the worst films ever made, features extraterrestrials who resurrect the dead as part of their plan to prevent humans from creating a doomsday weapon that could destroy the universe.

These aliens, fearing that human advancements in technology will lead to interstellar catastrophe, use their power to reanimate corpses, creating an army of zombies to serve their cause. This unconventional blend of science fiction and horror was pioneering in its attempt to merge two popular genres despite its poor execution and critical reception.

The reanimated corpses in Plan 9 from Outer Space are depicted as traditional zombies in many respects—they are slow-moving and mindless, following the commands of their alien masters without question. However, what sets them apart is the extraterrestrial element controlling their actions. This control is portrayed through crude special effects, with the aliens using ray guns and other devices to bring the dead back to life.

The film’s low budget is evident in these scenes, with visible strings and unconvincing props contributing to its infamous reputation. Despite these shortcomings, the film has garnered a cult following. It is celebrated for its unintended comedic value and ambitious, albeit flawed, storytelling.^[8]

2 Robot Zombies (Call of Duty: Black Ops, 2010)

In the popular first-person shooter series Call of Duty, particularly in the Black Ops installments, the concept of zombies is taken to a new level with the introduction of robot zombies. These zombies are part of the game’s highly popular Zombies mode, first introduced in Call of Duty: World at War and has since become a staple feature in subsequent titles. The unique twist of combining robotics with the undead creates a new layer of complexity and intrigue for players, blending the lines between biological horror and sci-fi elements.

The robot zombies in Call of Duty: Black Ops are often seen in various maps and settings, where they are depicted as a blend of reanimated corpses and mechanical enhancements. This fusion not only makes them more resilient and deadly but also ties into the game’s overarching themes of experimentation and military-industrial complexes.

For example, in the “Origins” map of Black Ops II, players encounter “Panzer Soldats,” which are essentially undead soldiers in mechanized suits, adding a formidable challenge to the gameplay. These robot zombies are not just mindless creatures but are integrated into the storyline, often tied to the dark experiments conducted by the game’s antagonists.^[9]

1 Humanoid Zombies (I Am Legend, 2007)

In the 2007 film I Am Legend, directed by Francis Lawrence and based on Richard Matheson’s 1954 novel of the same name, the zombies are portrayed as a result of a genetically re-engineered measles virus. The virus, initially intended to cure cancer, mutates and causes a global pandemic, wiping out most of humanity.

Those infected by the virus transform into aggressive, nocturnal creatures known as Darkseekers. Unlike traditional zombies, Darkseekers retain some human traits, such as the ability to coordinate attacks and a strong aversion to sunlight, which forces them to live in darkness. The protagonist, Dr. Robert Neville, played by Will Smith, is a virologist who is immune to the virus. He dedicates his life to finding a cure while navigating the desolate, post-apocalyptic landscape of New York City.

Neville conducts experiments on infected rats and captured Darkseekers in his home laboratory, seeking to reverse the effects of the virus. The film explores themes of isolation, hope, and the ethical dilemmas associated with scientific experimentation. The Darkseekers, while monstrous, also evoke sympathy as they are victims of humanity’s technological arrogance.

The portrayal of zombies in I Am Legend is notable for its blend of horror and science fiction elements. The film’s creatures exhibit characteristics of both zombies and vampires, such as their need to avoid sunlight and their animalistic behavior.^[10]

Quantum computing is a major trend in computer science. It’s jaw-dropping to think that it all started from observing the weird properties of light! There have been several pioneers in quantum computing, the main one being Richard Feynman—he explained that quantum computers are feasible and that they are the future of computing.

Quantum computers have existed since way before you think. The first quantum computation was carried out in 1997, using NMR on chloroform molecules.^[1] Nowadays, we’ve been trying to slap the “quantum” buzzword on just about anything. Even then, there are still a few applications—in the endless list of quantum technologies—that are really mind-boggling.

10 Improving Cancer Treatment

Cancer is one of the leading causes of death around the world. In fact, according to a recent survey from the World Health Organization (WHO), respiratory cancers alone claimed 1.7 million lives in 2016. However, if cancer is recognized at an early stage, the chances of recovery through treatment are much higher. There are many ways cancer can be treated. One is to remove it by surgery; another is through radiotherapy.

Beam optimization is critical in radiotherapy, as it is important to make sure that the radiation damages as little healthy cells and tissues near the cancer region as possible. There have been many optimization methods for radiotherapy in the past that use classical computers. In 2015, researchers at the Roswell Park Cancer Institute came up with a new technique that uses quantum annealing computers, like the ones manufactured by D-Wave, to optimize radiotherapy in a manner that is three to four times faster than that of a regular computer ^[2]

9 Better Traffic Flow

Many of us are familiar with waking up early and setting off for work, only to find a traffic jam waiting on the way. And then comes the terrifying feeling that you’re going to be late for work. Google has been working on fixing this problem by monitoring traffic and suggesting alternative routes to its users. However, Volkswagen is taking it to another level with their research.

In a 2017 experiment, Volkswagen tried to tackle the issue of traffic, not through monitoring but rather by optimizing traffic flow itself. They used the Quadratic Unconstraint Binary Optimization (QUBO) technique with quantum annealing computers to find the optimal route for a select number of cars and possible routes in consideration.^[3]

So far, they have tested this with 10,000 taxis in Beijing to show how their method can optimize traffic flow significantly faster than a classical computer. However, many people are skeptical of Volkswagen’s claims, since they used a D-Wave quantum annealing computer to do the processing. Many scientists state that the quantum annealers D-Wave manufactures do not offer a speedup as significant as Volkswagen claims.

8 Better Mobile Data Coverage

We have all been in a spot where the mobile data reception is excessively bad, and we’d rather just use that slow WiFi hotspot in that nearby coffee shop. Well, it seems that a company called Booz Allen Hamilton might just have found the solution to the horrible network coverage problem, with the help of quantum computers, of course!

In a 2017 publication, they suggested that optimal satellite coverage is pretty tough to figure out. This is because there are a lot of possible alignment combinations, and it is really hard to check all these combinations with classical computers.

The solution? They suggest that using the QUBO technique, as previously mentioned, with the help of D-Wave’s quantum annealing computers, can help find the optimal satellite coverage position required.^[4] This would not mean that the satellites would be able to cover all the bad reception spots, but the likelihood of being able to find a spot with better reception can be increased significantly.

7 Simulate Molecules

Molecule simulation has been a crucial field in biology and chemistry, as it helps us understand the structure of molecules and how they interact with each other. But it also helps us discover new molecules.

Although classical computers nowadays may be able to simulate these molecular dynamics, there is a limitation on the complexity of molecules in a given simulation. Quantum computers are able to effectively break this barrier. So far, they’ve only been used to simulate small molecules, like beryllium hydride (BeH₂), for example. It might not seem like much, but that fact that it was simulated by a seven-qubit chip shows that if we had more qubits at our disposal, we might be able to run extremely complex molecular simulations.^[5] This is because the processing power of quantum computers increases exponentially as the number of qubits increase.

Other hardware—like D-Wave’s quantum annealing computers—has also been used by researchers to come up with simulation methods that might be just as good, if not faster, than current methods.

6 Break Currently Used Cryptosystems Other Than RSA

Some of us might have heard of the scare about quantum computers being able to break cryptosystems such as RSA or DSA. This seems to be true for some cryptosystems, as they rely on prime numbers to generate a key based on prime factors. An algorithm, called Shor’s algorithm, can be used by quantum computers to find the prime factors used to generate the key, and they can do it much more efficiently.

But what about the other cryptosystems which do not rely on prime numbers to generate keys? There is another algorithm called Grover’s algorithm which might be used to brute force a key faster than a classical computer. However, this is not as big of a speedup as Shor’s algorithm would offer, compared to a classical computer (quadratic vs. exponential speedup). This would mean that we would need significantly faster quantum computers than the ones that currently exist to even attempt to break these cryptosystems.

Even with that, there are some cryptosystems that would be impossible for quantum computers to break. These cryptosystems are categorized within the field of “post-quantum cryptography.” Overall, though, it would seem that at least RSA—which is often used in digital signatures—would be obsolete.^[6]

5 More Humanlike AI

Artificial intelligence is an extremely trending field in computer science. Scientists have been trying to make AI more humanlike through the means of machine learning and neural networks. Seems terrifying, but now add quantum computers to the concoction, and it is taken to a whole new level.

Neural networks run on matrix-based data sets, and the processing done in neural networks is computed through the means of matrix algebra. However, quantum computing itself fundamentally works in such a nature that matrices are often used to define and determine the quantum states of qubits.^[7] So with that, any computational process done on the neural network would be similar to using transformational quantum gates on qubits. Hence, quantum computers seem like the perfect fit for neural networks incorporated in AI.

Not only that, but quantum computers can also help to significantly speed up machine learning compared to a classical computer. This is why Google has been investing in quantum computer research to improve Google AI by means of quantum hardware.

4 Quantum Cryptography

This is very different from post-quantum cryptography, as it is not meant to prevent quantum computers from breaking cryptosystems, though it does that, anyway. This type of cryptography uses the means of quantum mechanics itself. But how is it more versatile than other forms of cryptography?

Quantum cryptography mainly focuses on the key distribution part of a cryptosystem, here two pairs of entangled qubits are used. One is sent to the receiver, while the sender keeps the other. Entangled particles in a superposition, when measured, affect the other qubit. Send a stream of these qubits, and you have a key usable for encryption.^[8]

The best part about it is that eavesdropping is impossible, as the qubits cannot be copied. They can’t be measured, either, as there are methods to determine whether the qubit has been tampered with before being received by the intended recipient. This makes it a robust method for cryptography, which is why scientists are still researching this field.

3 Forecasting Weather

We’ve all had that time where we’ve checked the weather forecast, and it said that it was going to be a wonderful, sunny day. Then, only moments later, it starts to pour, and you didn’t bring your umbrella. Well, it seems quantum computers might have a solution for that.

In 2017, a Russian researcher published a paper about the possibility of using quantum computers to predict the weather more accurately than classical computers. There are a few limitations with current computers in predicting all the intricate changes in weather.^[9] This is because large amounts of data are involved, but quantum computers seem to offer a big speedup compared to classical means because of Dynamic Quantum Clustering (DQC) methodology, which is claimed to generate useful datasets that classical techniques cannot.

Even so, it must be noted that not even quantum computers can predict the weather with absolute accuracy, but at least it will be less likely that we will regret not bringing an umbrella on suspicious sunny days!

2 More Efficient Customized Advertisements

We all hate it when we search for an article, only to find it to be littered with advertisements. Most of it doesn’t even seem relevant! Luckily, Recruit Communications has found a solution for one of those two problems—the relevancy of ads.

In their research, they explained how quantum annealing can be used to help companies wanting to advertise to reach a wider range of people without spending too much. The quantum annealing can be used to match relevant advertisements to customers so that they’re more likely to click them.^[10]

1 Gaming With Quantum Computers

With all the speedup quantum computers offer in the computing field, one thing gamers might be curious about is whether they can be used to make a sweet gaming rig which can run games at blazing high framerates. The answer would be, “Sort of.”

At this point, the field of quantum computers is still at its infancy, and current hardware still hasn’t reached “quantum supremacy”—which is when quantum hardware can compute faster than the current best computers, though the definition is still vague. This is because quantum computer algorithms work very differently from classical ones. Even with that, quantum gaming still seems to be possible.

There have been a few games which have been developed to utilize quantum computers. One of them is called Quantum Battleships, which is based on the Battleships board game.^[11] Furthermore, Microsoft has been working on a programming language called Q#, which uses both classical and quantum hardware to compute. It is also very similar to C#, which would mean that it is very possible to develop games using Q# that take advantage of quantum hardware. Maybe we’ll have Call of Duty Q one day!

I am a small music producer from the UK with a newly acquired side hobby for writing articles!

It is my birthday! This is the vanity post as promised. On the recent update, bassbait suggested a list of my favorite things, which appealed to me as it would hopefully also partly be a list of things people don’t know about me (another suggested list by witcharachne). So, aside from the obvious things that I love such as raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens (just kidding – I hate whiskers on kittens) here are ten of my favorite things.

The Winner: Top 10 Places You Don’t Want to Visit
The Runners Up: Everything on this list, Top 10 Clowns you don’t want to Mess With

It was tough picking between the clowns list and the places list, but the places list wins because it caused a bit of controversy. Shortly after it was published I got a call from a Canadian paper, based in one of the towns on the list (the one with the Asbestos Mine) – they seemed a little pissed that I had said you don’t want to visit their town. My favorite entry on the list is the Alnwick Poison Gardens, as it combines the bizarre and the forbidden – two of my favorite topics.

The Winner: Alfred Schnittke
The Runners Up: Charles Ives, Bach, Verdi

Alfred Schnittke was a Russian-German composer whose music I discovered when I was in Music school, as a teen. I first saw his Concerto Gross 2, and was blown away by the power and the unusual style. Interestingly, he has some similarities to Charles Ives with his use of pastiche and polytonality. The clip above is typical of his style. Schnittke died in 1998. I love Ives because his music is so unique and groundbreaking in its time. I especially love his Concorde Sonata, which I try (dismally) to play on the piano – I only have some success with one of the movements. And Bach I like because when he was writing there were no real rules to music, and, despite this, he managed to make music that will be remembered forever.

The Winner: Rorate Caeli
The Runners Up: Basenotes, eGullet, BBC News

I actually spend very little time on the web for entertainment – most of my web use is on Listverse (which I have not counted for this item as it is most obviously my favorite), with the rest of it being sites dealing with our accounts (marketing and advertising). So, for the runners up, I have listed the sites that I spend most time on when I do use the web for entertainment. As for the winning site, Rorate Caeli, I visit that every morning once – I skim the articles and read a few of the comments, if the article is of interest. It is a news website for traditionally minded Catholics, and, often, is first to come out with interesting or new articles from around the world. The writers are all very honest and they always seem to pick stories I find interesting. Incidentally, the Latin words “Rorate Caeli (or coeli)” are the first words of the Book of Isaias: “Rorate coeli desuper et nubes pluant justum” which means: “Drop down dew, ye heavens, from above, and let the clouds rain the just”. The clip above is a Gregorian chant version of it.

The Winner: Marlon Brando
The Runners Up: Jared Leto, Christian Bale, Edward Norton, Leonardo DiCaprio, James Dean

Marlon Brando is widely considered the greatest movie actor of all time – he was so good that James Dean chased him about trying to get him to give him some training. Brando is absolutely amazing in a Streetcar Named Desire, and went from strength to strength throughout his career – no one will dispute his role in the Godfather was one of the best ever on film. As for my runners up, Jared Leto is good in everything – even the slightly boring film about the guy that killed John Lennon, Christian Bale has been amazing even as a kid in Empire of the Sun, DiCaprio is really an excellent actor even if you don’t like his personality or choice of films (namely, Titanic), James Dean is hard not to like, and Edward Norton is quirky but great.

The Winner: Bentley Mulsanne
The Runners Up: Chrysler 300C

It takes more than two months to make a Bentley Mulsanne, of which 50% is handcrafted. The Mulsanne was released this year and it replaces my previous favorite, the discontinued Bentley Arnage. Customers who can afford the $350,000 price tag have a choice of 114 paint colors, 21 carpet colors, nine wood veneers and 24 interior leather hides, and are able to specify a custom color scheme. I have always loved Bentley’s (the new models, not the old) and would love to own one one day. In the meantime, I am content with the runner up car, the Chrysler 300C, which is what I currently own.

The Winner: Lonestar Memories by Tauer
The Runners Up: Millesime Imperial By Creed, Attar Homage by Amouage

A website I really like reading is Basenotes – it is an online community of men and women who rate aftershaves and perfumes. Since I was a kid, I followed in my big brother’s footsteps by loving lots of different aftershaves – so this is a good way for me to learn about new ones. All three of the ones listed above are my favorites, and all three I discovered through Basenotes. Lonestar Memories is a love/hate aftershave – it is very strong and very masculine, but over the day it softens a lot. Millesime Imperial was the first one I bought on the list (which is why it is only a runner up) and it is a much fresher smell – more suited for going to the gym. Homage is the most expensive (at $350 for a tiny bottle) but it takes a field of roses to make. It is very possibly the nicest smelling aftershave in the world – but only my third favorite because it really takes a special occasion to wear it. It is typical of the new French-style perfumes coming from the Middle East with exotic ingredients.

The Winner: Anything by Michael Haneke
The Runners Up: All entries on this list

At present I am watching the films of Michael Haneke – an Austrian Director. I bought a box set of his DVDs recently because I saw the US remake (also by Haneke) of his original, Funny Games. As I go through the box set, I have not been disappointed at all by any of the movies. Code Unknown (starring Juliette Binoche) is my favorite, so far (it tells the story of several characters whose lives intertwine – a common theme for movies) though his most famous film is probably The Piano Teacher. If you haven’t seen anything by him, you definitely should. Here is the box set I bought if you want to buy it, and here is Code Unknown.

The Winner: X-Factor (UK)
The Runners Up: Great British Menu, Masterchef (UK), Glee, The Sarah Silverman Show

Wow – did I just confess that Glee is one of my favorite shows? The X-Factor is Simon Cowell’s British version of American Idol, and it has been running since 2004. It was the show that launched the career of Leona Lewis. I prefer the X-Factor to American Idol because the judges (and voting public) allow a much greater number of quirky people to get through the audition process, and when the contestants are chosen they all go to the judge’s houses for a bootcamp – so we get to see how Cowell and the other judges live. The selection of TV shows above is really about all I ever watch – I record what I want to see (or download it) and that is the only time I have the TV on. So this entry is not just my favorite TV shows, but my entire TV viewing at present. The clip above is my favorite auditionee this year – she is absolutely crazy! Note: in the X Factor the contestants audition in front of the judges and a huge audience.

The Winner: MGMTThe Runners Up: The Script, The Killers, Arctic Monkeys, Muse

I can’t remember when I first heard MGMT but, the moment I did, I loved their sound. The music is so easy to sing along with, and very quirky and upbeat. If you haven’t heard them before be sure to listen to the clip above – they really are very good. I heard Arctic Monkeys and Muse on the UK show Top of the Pops, and liked them immediately, so I downloaded their albums. I tend to listen to the Muse more than Arctic Monkeys now, and think the last AM album was not very good, so I haven’t bothered to buy it. And for the record, I buy all my music at the iTunes store – I don’t download it free

The Winner: French Cheese
The Runners Up: Roast

I really surprised myself when I realized that there are only two foods that I go crazy for – the two listed above. I have always been a fan of French cheeses (my favorites being Roquefort – a salty blue vein – and Pont L’Eveque – a strong smelling, brie-like cheese). When I am dieting I can happily avoid anything (I haven’t eaten takeaways in six months) but the one thing I can’t resist is cheese and crackers. I always have some when I see it. As for roasts, when I have a day off my diet I always have a roast – usually chicken, beef, lamb, pork or veal, with all the usual trimmings of gravy, roast potatoes, pumpkin (or carrots), and a green vegetable (at present often Brussels Sprouts as they are in season). I have been known to have a roast every day of the week (perhaps the reason for my original need to diet!)

Have you ever listened to a song and realized you had never really paid attention to the lyrics? This goes beyond simply mishearing the lyrics. Who hasn’t sung the wrong lyrics from time to time, right? This involves not truly understanding what the song is about. That’s how you end up singing something inappropriate at a bar mitzvah.

Here are some songs from musicals that will make you say “”Wait, THAT’S what that is about?”

Related: Top 10 Broadway Musicals You’ve Never Heard Of

10 “Edelweiss”–The Sound of Music

When The Sound of Music premiered on Broadway in 1959, the world instantly fell in love with Maria and the singing von Trapp kids. Nearly every song has entered the American vernacular—the titular opening, “Do Re Mi,” “So Long, Farewell,” and one kid-free tune: “Edelweiss.”

“Edelweiss” comes at a turning point in the show. Captain von Trapp has previously disapproved of his childrens’ singing, but when he hears his daughter playing the song, he’s moved. “Edelweiss” is meant to represent the Captain’s home country of Austria, as the edelweiss is a small white flower found in the Alps.

Over the years, rumors have spread that “Edelweiss” is an old Austrian folk tune or even the country’s national anthem. But Oscar Hammerstein II biographer Hugh Fordin says that even though “Edelweiss” was widely believed to be an old Austrian song, Hammerstein composed it for The Sound of Music.^[1]

9 “With You”–Pippin

From weddings to proposals, “With You” from Pippin has been used for years as a profession of love. On the surface, the lyrics do seem to point to a beautiful ballad meant for a loved one. Pippin claims his life would be “Twice as fair” if he could share his days with his girlfriend.

Except he’s not singing the song to his girlfriend. The scene is actually a huge orgy—Pippin weaves through women, comedically singing about “you” to dozens of women. The lyrics are meant to be humorously ironic, highlighting Pippin’s lack of commitment and genuine affection.

So unless you’re in an open marriage, probably leave this one out of the wedding reception.^[2]

8 “All You Wanna Do”–Six

There are thousands of songs with dark messages that are overlooked as such due to their poppy tempos or catchy refrains. Think about “Pumped Up Kicks” by Foster the People, which is actually about a school shooter. Or “Hey Ya” by Outkast, which, despite its upbeat meter, is about how love never really lasts.

In 2020, “All You Wanna Do” from Six the musical went viral on TikTok. Six tells the story of the six wives of Henry XIII from their point of view. “All You Wanna Do” is sung by Katherine Howard, Henry’s fifth wife, and details the history of how they met. On TikTok, people danced to the groovy title lyrics as Katherine talks about how all men want to do is have sex with her. This is already kind of sad. But if you listen to the whole song and not just the danceable parts, it gets even darker.

Katherine relays her first romance with her tutor: “He was 23 / And I was 13 going on 30!” And it doesn’t get better from there. As Katherine sings about her past boyfriends, the song ends with, “All you wanna do, baby / Is touch me, when will enough be enough?”

I’m not sure the kids on TikTok can really relate to that on a personal level. At least, I hope not.^[3]

7 “Not While I’m Around”–Sweeney Todd

“Nothing’s gonna hurt you / Not while I’m around” are the opening lyrics of this song from Sweeney Todd. Young Toby is held by his surrogate mother, Mrs. Lovett, as he protectively lets her know that he will do whatever it takes to shelter her from harm.

Sounds sweet, right? Not really. Lurking in the background of the show is Sweeney Todd, the murderous barber. Toby doesn’t know it, but at the moment, Sweeney is on a rampage, ready to kill anyone in his path (Spoiler alert: including Mrs. Lovett and Toby. And himself.) The song is meant to be ironic and sad, showing Toby’s innocence in contrast to literally every single other character’s murderous rages.^[4]

6 “Hope”–Groundhog Day

While this song may not be as popular outside of the theater community as other songs on this list, it’s the perfect example of a song that is significant only within the show itself.

Based on the Bill Murray movie of the same name, Groundhog Day follows jaded reporter Phil as he is forced to relive February 2nd over and over and over again. Both the movie and musical are humorous but have darker themes lying beneath them. One of the most jarring parts of the plot is after Phil decides he is done sleeping around, eating whatever he wants, and generally being a menace with no repercussions. Instead, he opts to kill himself.

It doesn’t work. He wakes up the next day and tries to kill himself again. In the musical, this happens during the song “Hope.” With lyrics like “Never give up hope / Never let yourself be defeated,” it’s easy to read this as an optimistic anthem. In reality, each chorus of the song shows Phil finding a new way to commit suicide, from dropping a toaster in the bathtub to jumping off a building.

The song ends with “Hold on to your faith / You may wanna live / But baby don’t give up hope,” revealing Phil’s true meaning was to keep hoping one day the suicide will work.^[5]

5 “You Will Be Found”–Dear Evan Hansen

“Have you ever felt like nobody was there?” is the opening line of this song from the musical Dear Evan Hansen.

Apparently, a lot of Christians feel that way because as soon as Dear Evan Hansen premiered on Broadway in 2016, “You Will Be Found” became an instant religious classic. The song skyrocketed from theater kids’ playlists right into public thanks to performances from Brigham Young University’s acapella group and other religious congregations.

The message of “You Will Be Found” is right there in the title. “Even when the dark comes crashing through, when you need someone to carry you,” main character Evan Hansen sings an uplifting tune. Or is he?

The person Evan is singing about isn’t himself, but a boy named Connor who recently killed himself. Evan wishes that everyone could be found, but Connor never had someone care about him the way Evan describes. It’s a heartbreaking lament about suicide, not a cheery little ditty to sing at church.^[6]

4 “What I Did for Love”–A Chorus Line

One of the most influential Broadway musicals of all time (and the seventh-longest-running Broadway show ever), A Chorus Line is noted for its lack of plot. The show consists of a chorus line of dancers telling their stories to a casting director, each one hoping to be hired. Through song, monologue, and dance, each performer is given a moment to shine.

“What I Did For Love” has become a part of popular culture thanks to artists like Bing Crosby, Aretha Franklin, and Josh Groban recording the song for albums. Out of context, the song sounds sweet: “As we travel on / Love’s what we’ll remember.” But the refrain “I can’t regret / What I did for love” doesn’t refer to a person; rather, it’s meant to convey the performer’s passion for dance and her reaction if she could never dance again.

It’s a song of intense suffering as the dancer recalls how she has poured her entire life and career into something that could be taken from her at any time. Some have even interpreted the song’s lyrics to be referencing the casting couch, a euphemism for performing sexual acts in exchange for a job. This was especially rampant in the 1970s when the show premiered.

Either way—it’s not about romantic love.^[7]

3 “My Favorite Things”–The Sound of Music

Okay, this song is pretty straightforward. So why is it on this list? Well, people not very familiar with musical theater have probably still heard this song on the radio in December. For some reason, “My Favorite Things” has become associated with the holiday season. Anyone listening to the lyrics “Warm woolen mittens / Brown paper packages tied up with strings” and mention of sleigh bells might assume that within the show, it’s Christmas morning or Eve.

In reality, this isn’t the case. “My Favorite Things” is sung by governess Maria to her children after they are frightened by a thunderstorm. It’s a sweet song that has gained international acclaim, but it has nothing to do with winter or Christmas.^[8]

2 “Everything’s Coming Up Roses”–Gypsy

This song has been referenced in everything from The Simpsons to The Muppets” but rarely with the original intent of the song.

The main character of the musical Gypsy is a stage mother who, halfway through the show, learns her talented youngest daughter has eloped. In a fit of rage and mania, she sings “Everything’s Coming Up Roses” to express her desire to have her older daughter, Louise, become a star instead. The title and refrain are a pun on the stage mother’s name, Rose. Thus, “roses” represent rose flowers and happiness, but also herself. Everything will come up Rose’s way.

Despite the big, brass notes and fun lyrics, the song isn’t triumphant or as happy as it seems. Ethel Merman biographer Brian Kellow says that the song is often misunderstood, as it’s meant to be a “chilling illustration of blind ambition with megalomania.”^[9]

1 “Cabaret”–Cabaret

The titular song of this tour-de-force of a show is quite famous thanks to stars like Ella Fitzgerald, Bing Crosby, and Judi Dench’s recorded renditions. Within the show, the song is sung by Sally Bowles, a pregnant former cabaret star. Out of context, the lyrics seem to be praising the joys of humanity: “Life is a cabaret old chum, come to the cabaret!”

The song has been used in movies and TV shows for years, usually as a delightful little ditty. But that’s not what the song is about. Sally isn’t happy at all—she’s coming to terms with the rise of Nazism in her home city of Berlin. Rather than addressing the emerging politics of the 1930s, she makes a vow to live her life in ignorance, having fun wherever she can. This includes making sure she’s unattached to her baby’s father, so the song ends with her deciding to get an abortion. In some stagings, such as the most recent Broadway revival, this is depicted through Sally punching herself in the stomach multiple times.

Unsurprisingly, the Louis Armstrong version of the song chose to leave those lyrics out.^[10]

From ancient Greece, where small fried fish were peddled, to Aztec marketplaces, where tamales, insects, and stews were a delicacy, ready-to-eat street food sold by vendors has been around for centuries. It’s still a staple of many cities today. Whether you want a hot dog, taco, or something more unique, there’s a food truck for that.

These days, many who have taken to the profession have indubitably experienced their share of ups and downs, predicated on a volatile economy and uncertain monetary prosperity. The following ten entries examine several unsavory street vendors who boiled over in events too bizarre and disgusting to comprehend or imagine prior to eating.

10 A Spicy Sriracha Shower

You never know when you might cross paths with an unhinged individual destined to ruin someone’s day. For Carlotta Washington, her run-in with Islam El Masry turned into a racist food fight after she attempted to pay for her lunch in quarters in June 2018. El Masry, the owner of Small Pharoah’s halal cart in Portland, Oregon, became so perturbed about Washington’s change that he responded in the only eloquent way he knew how: by calling her the “n-word,” a “stupid f—ing b—” and demanding that she “get the f— away” from his cart.

As if his romantic tirade wasn’t classy enough, El Masry took his fury a step further by and hurling a Gatorade bottle at her. Not long after that, he proceeded to douse Washington in sriracha. Numerous onlookers came to Washington’s defense as she sobbed in disbelief, covered in hot sauce. Three police officers arrived on scene a short time later and arrested the temperamental vendor on misdemeanor harassment and assault.

Incensed by the vendor’s demented actions, local residents began harassing the owner of an Egyptian food cart in downtown Portland the following day. The only problem was that it was a completely different individual with no association to the sriracha-wielding cook. Some 15 to 20 people holding signs shouted obscenities at Gharib Muhammad’s wife as she operated their food cart. One man staed, “I remember what you did yesterday.”^[1]

9 ‘Can I Get A Large Coke?’

When approaching the food truck of Johnny B. Jones (aka “Big Dad”) in Springfield, Tennessee, one could order a burger and fries with a side of cocaine. It eventually became public knowledge that the beloved neighborhood cook was offering hot dogs along with the daily special, his infamous booger sugar. Booked into Robertson County jail on a six-count indictment in spring 2018, the 57-year-old could very well be trading in his apron for a fashionable orange jumpsuit.

Jones’s dire predicament began following a joint investigation by the Robertson County Sheriff’s Office and the Springfield Police Department’s narcotics division nearly a year prior to his arrest. It seems that arrogance was more of a factor than logic for the peddler, as detectives observed an innumerable amount of transactions at Big Dad’s stand, all while he turned famished frowns into smiles and, perhaps, rapid heartbeats. “It was a shock to us, what we found out,” said Detective Houston Evans. “I’m sure everyone else who heard about this is shocked, as well.”

The distinctive red and yellow truck that had become so loved by Springfield locals throughout the years is now a grim reminder of the growing drug problem throughout their state. In a final twist of irony, Jones’s home-style cooking food truck was situated near one of the most laughable localities, a police station and sheriff’s office.^[2]

8 Daily Specials

A woman in Long Island was smoking more than just sausage when she converted her hot dog truck into a miniature brothel. In 2012, Catherine Scalia, 45, decided to expand her business by handing out suggestive cards titled “Strips-R-Us” and advertising a “topless cleaning service” and “one-on-one strips.”

Disgruntled and nauseated neighbors not privy to her marketing strategies eventually complained to authorities, stating, “In the summertime she’s out in her bra and panties. It’s disgusting. She’s filthy, she’s dirty. How could men take that?” In her own defense, the mother of four contentedly gloated about her professionalism and unyielding restraint when it comes to children, asserting, “I zip up when I see kids.” In spite of such morality, Scalia soon found herself inside a jail cell after offering one of her daily specials to an undercover police officer.

This was not the first time that her flesh-peddling ways led her to the slammer. Scalia was arrested eight years prior after performing sexual acts on her co-chef in the “captain’s chair” of the same hot dog truck. According to one local resident who observed several satisfied clients blissfully leave her establishment, “They seemed pretty happy. Now I can see why.” One can only hope that her proficiency in cleaning is as highly regarded as her “home cooking.”^[3]

7 The Hot Dog Nazi

Michael Anderson of M.A.’s Gourmet Dogs in Anchorage, Alaska, garnered quite the reputation after serving up sizzling hot dogs with an attitude. Known as “the hot dog Nazi,” Anderson was infamous for his strict rules (such as refusal to serve anyone talking on a cell phone) and his tendency to lose his cool if customers dared to stray from his stringent regulations.

His bizarre tirades became endearing to local residents for nearly 20 years. That was until he was charged for unwanted sexual contact with a teenage employee in 2015. Ironically enough, the incident occurred near Anderson’s pushcart, situated in front of the old Federal Building, of all places. According to Anderson’s accuser, he coerced her with alcohol before touching her “down there.” In addition to his appalling advances, the 54-year-old vendor took a liking to gorging on marijuana brownies while on the job and washing it down with pints of vodka.

With several charges stacked against him and his reputation in shambles, Anderson killed himself in 2016, one day before he was set to go to trial. To date, the vacancy on the infamous corner he stood on for over two decades echoes a sobering memory of a troubled and wasted life.^[4]

6 Virgin Boy Eggs

An unmistakable, pungent aroma reminiscent of a nursing home is what you can find permeating the streets of the Chinese city of Dongyang. As local residents flock to their neighborhood vendor, buckets of boys’ urine boil over as eggs are soaked and cooked in the fragrant yellow “broth.” The unique snack, popular for its “fresh and salty taste,” is a local tradition that has been passed down by ancestors for centuries. “Virgin boy eggs,” as they’re so eloquently named, are claimed to have remarkable health benefits. Gallons of piss are collected from primary schools and used as the main ingredient by egg vendors throughout the city.

Virgin boy eggs are not only served up on street corners but in residences as well. In those instances, the magical yellow liquid is personally collected by locals from nearby schools under the guise of a therapeutic appetizer. “If you eat this, you will not get heat stroke. These eggs cooked in urine are fragrant,” said egg vendor Ge Yaohua. “They are good for your health. Our family has them for every meal. In Dongyang, every family likes eating them.” Interestingly enough, government officials listed the nauseating treat as part of the city’s cultural heritage, ensuring its popularity and consumption for centuries to come.^[5]

5 Satay Chicken

“Satay chicken, not dog?” asked a skeptical tourist on a Bali beach after purchasing mystery meat from a vendor. “I’m happy just as long as it’s not dog,” the man said before he naively devoured poor Lassie. Sadly, such revolting grub is commonplace in Indonesia, where dogs are tortured prior to their slaughter for human consumption. An investigation led by Animals Australia found that vendors throughout Bali have been deceptively selling canine meat to unsuspecting tourists under the guise of chicken. “Tourists will walk down a street, they’ll see a street store selling satay but what they are not realising is the letters RW on the store mean it is dog meat being served,” Animals Australia’s campaign director Lyn White said.

In a place where dog meat is legal, hoards of unscrupulous vendors hunt, steal, beat, hang, or poison the canines in order to turn a quick profit. An unapologetic 83-year-old, for example, resorted to snatching an average of 12 dogs a week due to the fact that he could not find another source of income. After capturing his prey, be it an older dog or a puppy, the elderly man described bludgeoning the animals with a metal pipe in a nonchalant fashion without the slightest hint of remorse.

As grotesque as his method is, it is far more troublesome that countless vendors have been known to use cyanide as a means to kill. Dr. Andrew Dawson of the New South Wales Poisons Information Centre stated that its use poses a significant threat, considering that, “Cyanide is not going to be destroyed by cooking. So there will be cyanide throughout the dog’s body. The actual risk depends upon how much poison is in the dog meat.” To date, no human deaths have been reported from the consumption of dog meat in Indonesia, yet. Time will tell.^[6]

4 A Special Ingredient

As if urine-soaked eggs weren’t stomach-churning enough, a 59-year-old paani puri vendor in India was arrested in 2011 for adding his own special flavor to his sauces. Naupada resident Ankita Rane, 19, began keeping a close eye on vendor Rajdev Lakhan Chauhan, who had a reputation for being “quite gross,” from the confines of her balcony. “We have seen him scratching himself or picking his nose if no one was around. I had always asked my friends to refrain from eating there, but they were so hooked to the taste that they rubbished whatever we said.”

That all changed, however, after Rane witnessed Chauhan urinating into his saucepans before blending his tangy delicacy into the paani puri mix or the neighborhood favorite, ragda. After several days of dousing his utensils with golden showers, the saucy street vendor was filmed in the act. The video was then shown to local residents. When neighbors in the area learned of Chauhan’s special ingredient, they surrounded his cart and took turns beating him up before dragging the devious urinator to the police station.

When questioned, Chauhan simply stated that he had nowhere else to pee and that urinating into the pans kept the residential streets of Bhaskar Colony clean. Despite his righteous intentions, police decided to detain Chauhan but were confused about what to charge him with: “In the end, all we could book him under was the Bombay Police act for urinating in public places.” Chauhan ultimately pleaded guilty and was fined 1,200 rupees before being let off with a warning.^[7]

3 Turf Wars

In 2016, when ice cream man John Cierco pulled up to his “favorite spot” in New York City, a sense of ire pulsed through his veins upon finding a pretzel vendor encroaching on “his” corner. Moments later, the pretzel peddler was pummeled over the head with a baseball bat.

Such barbaric acts over turf become surprisingly commonplace when profit-oriented territory determines ones success. In spite of cities not dictating certain locations for food carts or trucks, unwritten rules have allowed vendors to virtually own particular spots for decades on end. This has spawned violent turf wars by established vendors, who see newcomers as competition in a desperate economy.

In 2012, bullets flew outside Yankee Stadium when 52-year-old Horace Coleman shot two competitors multiple times with a .357 magnum. According to witnesses, Coleman, known on the streets as “Ace,” had been at war over his sidewalk turf for quite some time. “They were trying to bully him out of his spot,” said Coleman’s friend Gracie Olivera; that is until the pistol-packing vendor—dressed in a pinstripe suit, a flamboyant derby hat, and gold-framed sunglasses—took matters into his own hands. “He didn’t say anything. He walked up, pulled out and started firing. Bang! Bang! Bang!”^[8]

2 Human Tamales

Working on an anonymous tip in 2004, Mexican police raided the home of a tamale vendor suspected of having a dismembered corpse in his kitchen. Upon the discovery of carved-up body parts, detectives noted that the appetizing ingredients were in the process of being boiled on the stove with herbs and spices.

The homicidal vendor, who worked as a butcher for eight years, vehemently denied using human meat in the tamales that he sold from his cart. Nonetheless, police took it upon themselves to test the tamales for human remains as opposed to taking the word of a man halfway into the process of filleting a fresh cadaver. According to the resourceful chef, he killed the unidentified man in a drunken argument the day prior to seasoning him for lunch.

Following an analysis, police found no trace of human flesh in the food. However, police claimed to have found “other materials” and ingredients suggesting that the unorthodox cook was preparing to make a “new batch” of tamales while in the vicinity of his decomposing, edible victim, or soon-to-be cuisine.^[9]

1 Tarek El-Tayeb Mohammed Bouazizi

The only vendor on this list worthy of accolades is Tarek el-Tayeb Mohammed Bouazizi, who, on December 17, 2010, set himself ablaze, igniting a revolution. Working as a vegetable seller in the Tunisian town of Sidi Bouzid, Bouazizi’s dream was to save enough money to purchase a food truck. Sadly, the 26-year-old’s hopes and aspirations came crashing down when a policewoman confiscated his unlicensed vegetable cart and his produce. To add insult to injury, the officer slapped Bouazizi, insulted his dead father, and spat in the scrawny vendor’s face.

After his complaints to local municipality officials fell on deaf ears, a humiliated and dejected Bouazizi doused himself with fuel in the town’s square and set himself on fire. As Bouazizi clung to life in the hospital, outrage erupted throughout the country over the high unemployment, corruption, and autocratic rule.

Following his death on January 4, 2011, Bouazizi became a legend, with his martyrdom symbolizing the people’s struggle for survival and how it has shaken despotic Arab governments in what many have referred to as the “people’s revolution.” In response to the growing protests, Tunisia’s President Zine el Abidine Ben Ali fled to Saudi Arabia On January 14, 2011, bringing an end to his dictatorship after 23 years of power.^[10]

Adam is just a hubcap trying to hold on in the fast lane.

The race to colonize Mars is ongoing. However, it is not as easy as sending over people to live in igloo cities. We’ve already discussed the obstacles that astronauts must overcome on a voyage to Mars. But there’s far more to mystify us and conquer once we get there.

The Red Planet’s geology is not fully understood, and the bits known by researchers include deadly phenomena capable of crushing the dream of human settlements. Apart from highlighting the harsh landscape, this mind-blowing world comes with epic geological mysteries and unique finds.

10 The Strange Cloud

In 2018, the Mars Express orbiter sailed past the Martian equator. Among the images beamed back was the odd photo of a cloud. The white streak stood out starkly against the red world and measured 1,500 kilometers (930 mi) long.

More curiously, it appeared to originate above a volcano. The possibility of an eruption was zero—Arsia Mons was a long-extinct volcano. In fact, the last time that Mars saw any kind of eruption was millions of years ago.

However, there was a chance that Arsia Mons spawned the vapor. Clouds often shroud the dead volcano, but the only ones resembling the 2018 fog trail are found on Earth.

Called orographic clouds, they form on the downwind side of mountains. Air gets pushed uphill where it spreads, cools, and condenses on dust particles. Oddly, clouds resembling this phenomenon have appeared near Arsia Mons’s peak every three years since 2009. The 2018 cloud fit this pattern perfectly.^[1]

9 First Wind Recording

The InSight lander touched down on Mars in 2018. The high-tech device’s main purpose was to find out more about the planet’s interior. After arriving, the lander had some free time while adjusting to its new surroundings. Scientists decided to listen to the wind on Mars, and for the first time, they managed to do so successfully.

The ultrasensitive equipment and sensors picked up sounds audible to humans as well as frequencies in the infrasound range. NASA recorded both, and the result was eerie. One researcher described it as a mix of Earth’s wind, an ocean roaring, and something else that gave it an otherworldly quality.

The wind gusts came from the northwest and blew across the lander’s solar arrays at 24 kilometers per hour (15 mph) and 16 kilometers per hour (10 mph). The recordings were made by Insight’s air pressure sensor and seismometer. When the lander’s real job began, researchers reversed their wind study and used the sensor to cancel the windy commotion because it interfered with the seismometer’s ability to probe inside the planet.^[2]

8 Fire Opals

In 1911, a Martian meteorite hit Egypt close to the village of El Nakhla El Bahariya. Thus called Nakhla, the space rock found a home at the Natural History Museum in the UK. In 2015, scientists reexamined it and found a first for Mars. The meteorite contained fire opals.

On Earth, these breathtaking gems have a warm, flame-like tint. They only form in the ocean around hydrothermal vents. This type of opal is useful to scientists because it traps microbes during formation.

This opened another avenue for looking for life on Mars. Previously, surface samples from the Red Planet suggested that opals could form in certain regions, but Nakhla provided the first direct gems.

Under a powerful microscope, the Martian opals showed that they were a couple of million or billion years old and very similar to Earth’s. Unfortunately, the slivers were too small to look for life. Future expeditions could target Mars’s opal regions for larger samples.^[3]

7 Mysterious Blueberries

In 2004, NASA’s Opportunity rover cruised around Mars. After a few months, it encountered something curious—tiny spheres—which scientists do not understand to this day. Working with false-color photographs that turned the spheres blue, researchers puzzled over the mysterious “blueberries” scattered around the Martian surface.

Which geological forces created them, and what did that reveal about the planet’s past environment?

Recently, researchers pounced on the nearest places that resembled the red wonder—Mongolia and Utah. To everyone’s excitement, they found something similar. The minuscule globes on Earth had calcite cores encased in iron and were likely shaped by a lengthy exposure to moving water. The “river pebble” look suggested that a lot of water had flooded the blueberry region.^[4]

Scientists cannot be sure of the chemical makeup of the Martian spheres. If they can crack that riddle, it might reveal the chemistry of the water that crafted them and whether the region was habitable. In other words, they may discover if the water encouraged any form of life.

6 Missing Methane

The world of space news lit up with exciting news in 2003. NASA announced the discovery of methane on Mars. The following year, this was independently confirmed by the European Space Agency (ESA).

It seemed like a done deal in 2014 when NASA’s Curiosity rover found more of the gas on the Martian surface. The atmosphere of Mars was packed with methane. Scientists were excited because this type of organic molecule suggested the presence of life.

However, in the years that followed, the methane-rich atmosphere disappeared. In 2016, the first sobering realization happened when the ESA sent their ExoMars Trace Gas Orbiter (TGO) to the planet. It was outfitted with ultrasensitive sensors capable of picking up trace amounts of methane.^[5]

As Mars had previously emitted copious amounts, nobody thought that TGO would report the methane missing. Two years later while still in orbit around Mars, it never detected any. TGO is not faulty, and a lot of its new data awaits crunching. It could still reveal the answer to the missing (or hidden) methane.

5 Medusae Fossae Formation

The Opportunity rover was forced into hibernation during 2018. The reason: Lethal dust storms had completely engulfed Mars. This event highlighted an old mystery. The Red Planet has too much dust.

Back on Earth, dust is the by-product of natural processes like rivers, volcanic activity, and moving glaciers. None of these are active on the Red Planet. Yet, about 3 trillion kilograms (6.6 trillion lbs) of the powdery stuff appears every year.

In 2018, researchers found the source of the endless dust. Most of it came from the Medusae Fossae Formation. When the formation was first discovered in the 1960s, nobody really knew what it was.

The massive geological formation, measuring 1,000 kilometers (620 mi) long, was identified as volcanic, which made it the biggest volcanic deposit in the solar system. Incredibly, the formation was once half the size of the United States.

Around 80 percent of its porous material had already eroded, which created an unbelievable amount of powder. This was confirmed when dust everywhere on Mars chemically matched the Medusae’s trademark sulfur-to-chlorine ratio.^[6]

4 Earthlike Water Cycle

In 2018, scientists investigated a site for a lander to park in 2020. This spot, Hypanis Valles, was once an ancient river system. During the check, the area revealed something amazing: Mars likely had a hydrological cycle that closely matched Earth’s—including a massive ocean.

The study found the largest river delta ever discovered on the Red Planet. It left trademark deposits at the mouth of the river system which could only have formed if moving water had flown into a sea. One large enough to cover a third of the planet’s north.

The presence of such big water bodies in the region had always been among the most critical mysteries regarding the geology of Mars. An ocean means that the desertlike world once had a water cycle supported by lakes, rivers, seas, and vast oceans.^[7]

Scientists believe that this system was global and worked in the same way as Earth’s until 3.7 billion years ago. A rapid decline of some sort destabilized the cycle until it failed for good. Today, the Martian surface is devoid of liquid water.

3 Curiosity’s Legacy

After years of exploring the Martian landscape, NASA’s Curiosity rover made history in 2018 and possibly solved the planet’s methane mystery. First, the samples it provided finally proved that there were biological compounds on Mars. Second, the rover’s observations gave a fair idea of where the methane went. Both developments were hailed as breakthroughs in astrobiology.

The geological samples came from mudstone regions in the Gale crater, aged around 300 million years old. They revealed organic chemistry that was nearly identical to Earth’s mudstone but came from larger, more complex materials.^[8]

Curiosity also found a pattern: The methane appeared and disappeared. Analysis showed the exciting results: The changes matched the Martian seasons. In the northern hemisphere, methane spiked in the summer and vanished during winter.

Although the dynamics remain mysterious, one theory matched the rhythm. Crystalline water structures called clathrates could be causing the annual methane shift as they seasonally lock the gas in ice and then thaw.

2 Babies On Mars

Scientists have a serious fixation about Mars colonies. The idea is to create a sustainable population and make humans a multi-planetary species. To be successful, generations must be born and raised on Mars. Nobody knows if that is even possible. The two biggest hurdles are radiation and gravity.

Astronauts already endure space radiation, and their exposure is carefully monitored. The effects on a delicate fetus could be disastrous, resulting in serious abnormalities.^[9]

Also, gravity on Mars is only 38 percent of Earth’s. Frankly, researchers do not have a clue how this might affect an unborn baby or a growing child. Tests on animals fail to yield consistent results.

Mammalian reproduction in space is proving so complex that the best theories mean nothing. Not until people have babies on Mars or human embryos are tested in space can the real effects be gauged. However, this will cause so much ethical resistance that progress in that department is basically nonexistent.

1 Martian Terraforming Is Out

If humans want to walk and breathe on Mars, the planet needs to be terraformed. This means that the extremely cold temperatures and thin atmosphere must be manipulated to suit Earthlings. The first step would be to make Mars toastier with carbon dioxide.

A 2018 study crushed that dream. There is simply not enough of the greenhouse gas. The study did a thorough check on all the planet’s carbon dioxide reservoirs locked away in rock and ice and found that, even if we released them all, it would still not be enough. Combined, the amount of gas would only triple the atmosphere’s thickness—a mere one-fiftieth of that required for terraforming.^[10]

Another hurdle is our current tech level. Even if there was enough CO₂ sealed away in the Martian landscape, humans do not have the expertise to perform what would amount to major alterations to the surface.

There is still another obstacle: Mars does not have a magnetic field strong enough to hold onto an atmosphere. Whatever CO₂ is released eventually drifts into space.

Humans have been sailing for millennia, but submarines as we know them today are a more recent innovation. It takes a brave soul to journey in one of these claustrophobic underwater vessels, surrounded on all sides by the crushing pressure of the sea.

We all know about the Yellow Submarine, but most people don’t know about the following tales of intrigue and mystery from deep underwater, and sometimes right at the surface. Ghosts, sea monsters, UFOs, and skeletons aren’t just for pirate ships, or spaceships for that matter. Submarines have their own stories of unexplained lore.

10 U-505

On October 24, 1943, U-505 was bombed with depth charges by British destroyers. In the midst of the attack, Peter Zschech, the commander of the sub, shot himself in the head in front of his crew in the control room.

In an account of the day’s events, a crewman named Hans Goebler notes that Zschech didn’t fully die by the gunshot and was making loud sounds after he shot himself, making it easier for the British to locate them by sonar. He then describes someone grabbing a pillow and placing it over Zschech’s mouth, to the dismay of the crew doctor, who protested, but two other crew members held the pillow firmly until Zschech was silent.^[1]

Zschech’s second-in-command took over and led the crew through the attack, and everyone on board survived but Zschech. The entry from the logbook that day reads “Kommandant tot,” meaning “Commanding Officer dead.”

9 UB-65

Another German U-boat, this time from World War I, that had uncannily morbid luck was UB-65.

Before she set out to sea, a torpedo exploded, injuring several crewmen and killing the second officer, Lieutenant Richter. Soon after she left port, a lookout who was in the conning tower reported seeing Lieutenant Richter, returned to haunt the boat, standing on the deck. Maybe it was the long, lonely days at sea, but crewmen kept reporting sightings of him, and things got so bad that the higher-ups had to step in. The Imperial Navy ordered a pastor to kick the ghost out.^[2]

In UB-65 ’s final stroke of terrible luck, an American submarine found the U-boat along the Irish coast. As the Americans prepared to attack, they were shocked to see UB-65 explode on its own before they fired. One American officer also reported seeing a silhouette on the deck wearing a German officer’s overcoat, with folded arms, standing sturdy while the boat sank.

8 UB-85

Who doesn’t love a good sea monster story? On April 30, 1918, the crew of the German U-boat UB-85 surrendered willingly to a British patrol boat as their sub sank. The Germans’ commanding officer, Captain Krech, had a strange story about why they didn’t resist: He said that the previous night, while UB-85 was surfaced, a “strange beast” had crashed out of the water and attached itself to the deck, its enormous weight nearly sinking the boat. The beast, according to Krech, had “large eyes, set in a horny sort of skull.” The crew started firing their sidearms at it, eventually hurting it enough to weaken its grip. The monster let go, but it left the deck so damaged that UB-85 couldn’t dive.^[3]

In 2016, the wreck of UB-85 was discovered, bringing attention to what could have possibly happened back in 1918. Was it a sea monster, or something else?

Historians recently uncovered an interview with another crew member which tells us what might have really happened: Apparently, Krech had a heater installed in the officers’ quarters. The cables for this heater ran through a watertight hatch, making it vulnerable to flooding. It’s likely that Krech’s story is just a “sea monster sank my submarine” excuse for his own indiscretion, though believers still insist it was a kraken-like monster.

7 The H.L. Hunley

Picture this: It’s 2000, and you’re a diver going underwater to help pull out the Confederate submarine H.L. Hunley, the first combat submarine ever to sink an enemy warship. The submarine disappeared the same day it sank the USS Housatonic, on February 17, 1864.

When you get to peek inside the craft, you are struck by the sight of eight skeletons, each manning a respective submarine station, none of which appear to have been alarmed by sinking or have moved from their posts. What could have caused them to stay where they were, perfectly preserved in a strange image of action?

The answer scientists found is that the H.L. Hunley suffered from the explosion of its own torpedo, which was detonated by ramming the Housatonic, knocking them unconscious. Unable to guide the sub or do anything else, they remained at their stations, not to be discovered for 136 years.^[4] The H.L. Hunley came to rest about 300 meters (1,000 ft) away from the wreck of the Housatonic.

6 USS Trepang

Submarines are the last place you would think you’d see a UFO. But in 2015, mysterious photographs published to the French magazine Top Secret showed just that: a cigar-shaped unidentified flying object.^[5]

The photos were reportedly taken in March 1971 by an officer aboard the Trepang in the middle of the ocean between Iceland and Jan Mayen, a barely inhabited Norwegian island. At the time, the Trepang was conducting a routine expedition and apparently found the UFO by accident, as it was spotted through the periscope by officer John Klika.

A British UFO investigator named Nigel Watson has said that similar-looking cigar-shaped aircraft have been spotted and reported since 1896, and reports have come from all across the world. While he is skeptical of the authenticity of the photographs, we can dream, right?

5 Quester I

Have you ever seen the shipwrecks on Coney Island Creek in New York City? They look like skeletons could pop out at any moment. The most unusual of these ships is a submarine that has a rusty orangish-yellow conning tower sticking up. This submarine, called the Quester I, was built for a purpose that never ended up being fulfilled: to rescue treasure from a sunken ocean liner that lies under the Atlantic off the coast of Massachusetts, the Andrea Doria, which sank in 1956.

In the late 1960s, Jerry Bianco set about building a submarine that could submerge to the sunken ship and salvage the valuables. He painted the sub yellow not because of the famous Beatles song but because the yellow paint was the best deal he could find.

On October 19, 1970, after four years of hard work, the sub was lowered into Coney Island Creek. The crane operator wasn’t supposed to lower the sub entirely into the water, but he did. Bianco had only removed the ballast from one side as money-saving measure, so the sub ended up tipping on its side so much that Bianco’s investors lost faith in its ability to float, and it never left the creek. The Quester I still sits in the same spot today.^[6]

4 K-219

On October 3, 1986, Soviet submarine K-129 was patrolling in the Atlantic Ocean about 1,100 kilometers (700 mi) northeast of Bermuda. An engineer noticed a leak from a plug in the torpedo room and tried to stop it. Water started rushing in. Eventually, a torpedo casing split, and the resulting explosion killed three crew members and started an enormous flood. One of the crewmen gave his life to enter the nuclear compartment to shut down the engine, and they were able to surface.

When the captain opened the hatch, however, he noticed something strange: There appeared to be two long scratch marks along the side of the submarine, but they hadn’t collided with anything along the way. The Soviet Navy suspected that the cause of the scratch and explosion was an American submarine patrolling nearby, the USS Augusta. The US Navy, to this day, denies that they attacked K-219.

In 2010, Soviet captain Nikolai Tushin gave an interview about what he believes collided with K-219 instead: an unidentified underwater object called a “Quacker,” called that because of the sound it makes, a cross between a duck quack and a frog croak. These odd sounds started to be noticed by sonar operators during the Cold War, likely because of the advances made in sonar during that time.^[7] If a Quacker is responsible, it can still visit K-219 at the bottom of the sea today.

3 U-166

Most people know about the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor in 1941, but less known is the German U-boat patrol in the Gulf of Mexico in an effort to sink American merchant ships right on their home shore.

One of the 17 U-boats in this German fleet was U-166. In 1942, it spotted a steam passenger ship called the Robert E. Lee, and the unsuspecting passengers on board thought they saw a shark streaming toward them underwater until a torpedo struck the ship and sent her sinking to the bottom of the ocean. While survivors clung to lifeboats, the US Navy’s PC-566 dropped a depth charge on the U-boat, never finding out whether they had successfully hit it. Coast Guard planes also spotted and bombed another U-boat, but once they returned to base, they were told that the matter was classified and never found out whether they had made a hit in either case.

It was only in 2001, upon a petroleum survey’s discovery of a U-boat near where the Robert E. Lee sank, that historians found the answer: The U-166 was sank by the first attack.^[8] Both the Robert E. Lee and U-166 now sit at the bottom of the Gulf of Mexico, an eerie reminder of a German attack incredibly close to American soil during World War II, less than 80 kilometers (50 mi) south of the Mississippi River Delta.

2 The Surcouf

At the time it was launched in 1929, the Surcouf was the largest submarine in the world, built to rival the ever more advanced U-boats put out by the German Navy. When Germany invaded France, the Allies were fearful that they would also seize control of French submarines. The Surcouf was ordered to Plymouth, England, and the French crewmen didn’t exactly enjoy being boarded by their historical foe, despite being on the same side, and there was a fight onboard which resulted in four deaths.

Tension didn’t exactly stop after the fight. Each side of the French forces believed the other was secretly working for the Germans, and the British even suggested that some French ships attacked British ships. Eventually, the Surcouf was ordered to the Pacific and stopped in Bermuda to refuel. In February 1942, she disappeared in the Caribbean off the coast of Panama and was never heard from again.

One theory is that the sub collided with an American merchant ship, which reported striking something in the water. Some people credit the loss of the Surcouf to the Bermuda Triangle, years before it would become infamous.^[9] Whatever happened, neither the remains of the Surcouf nor her crew have ever been found.

1 U-537

The Germans had some strange military initiatives in World War II, but perhaps one of the most unusual was the scientific outpost they created in the Arctic Circle. Since the Allies occupied the westernmost areas, they were much better able to predict the weather for their naval strategies. That was until Germany decided to set up a weather outlet of their own. This weather station was delivered by U-537, which was outfitted to be able to install the equipment on the northern shore of Labrador.^[10]

The submarine persisted north despite pretty intense obstacles: It hit an iceberg and sustained major damage, rendering it unable to submerge. The Germans, however, managed to reach their destination and set up their weather station. They disguised their setup as much as possible, making up a fake Canadian name for their equipment and strewing American cigarette packs around to make it seem like it was an Allied station. On its way back to its port in occupied France, U-537 was attacked three times by Canadian planes but managed to escape.

Louise enjoys coffee, dogs, and people-watching.

It isn’t often that Broadway and pop culture meet. How many regular people do you know who can name three musicals on Broadway right now?

But these songs did the impossible. Thanks to great lyrics, catchy tunes, and some famous covers (mostly by Frank Sinatra), here are ten iconic songs most people don’t know started as show tunes.

Related: Top 10 Broadway Flops That Actually Aren’t That Bad

10 “We Need a Little Christmas”—Mame

One of the multiple Christmas songs you may not have known is from musicals, “We Need a Little Christmas,” takes the cake for most surprising. Sure, not everyone knows that “White Christmas” is from the Broadway musical of the same name, but even less know that “We Need a Little Christmas” actually originated with the Jerry Herman musical Mame.

Within the show, the song is sung when Mame Dennis, a New York City sophisticate, learns that her fortune has been lost in the Wall Street Crash of 1929. She sings to her nephew that they “need a little Christmas” in order to cheer up from the depressing thoughts of their next few years.

Now, it may be sung about needing to cheer up from holiday family parties with the in-laws.^[1]

9 “You’ll Never Walk Alone”—Carousel

One of Rodgers and Hammerstein’s most controversial shows, Carousel is a sweeping epic love story between carousel barker Billy and mill worker Julie. “You’ll Never Walk Alone” is sung by Julie’s best friend, Nettie, after Julie learns her husband has killed himself. Despite this sad background, it is an uplifting tune about friendship and love that has exploded out of the musical theater world and into football games.

Liverpool Football Club adopted the song as its anthem after the success of a 1963 recording by local Liverpool group Gerry and the Pacemakers. The song’s title is the club motto and is even included on their coat of arms.

Since then, the song has become almost spiritual, with Elvis Presley recording a gospel version in 1967, which was used in support of COVID-19 doctors and nurses in 2020.^[2]

8 “My Funny Valentine”—Babes in Arms

No, Frank Sinatra didn’t write this song, though he certainly did popularize it.

Richard Rodgers and Lorenz Hart wrote “My Funny Valentine” for their 1937 musical Babes in Arms, a coming-of-age story about a group of teenagers who must put on a show to avoid being sent to a work farm (don’t question it, it was the ’30s.)

Though the lyrics seem clever on their own, as the singer (within the show, a girl named Billie) mocks their love’s bad looks but lets them know they shouldn’t “Change a hair for me / Not if you care for me,” affirming their true affection. As an added little bonus for those who know the show, Billie is singing to her crush, Valentine. That’s right, the song isn’t about Valentine’s Day, but an actual person with that name!

While other artists such as Harpo Marx, Elvis Costello, and Miles Davis have recorded the song, it was Sinatra’s version in 1955 that pushed “My Funny Valentine” into the public consciousness.^[3]

7 “I Feel Pretty”—West Side Story

Even though West Side Story is one of those musicals everyone seems to know, anyone who hasn’t actually sat down and seen the show or watched the movie may be surprised to learn that the classic little ditty “I Feel Pretty” is from the modern adaptation of Romeo and Juliet.

From Sesame Street to Friends, the song has been featured or parodied in media for years, to the point where many people don’t know it originated with West Side Story. The simple lyrics “I feel pretty / Oh so pretty / I feel pretty and witty and bright” are enjoyable even out of the context of the show and are a popular choice for talent shows or choirs.

Composer Stephen Sondheim has said that “I Feel Pretty” is actually his least favorite of all the songs he’s written. According to him, not only does the song disrupt the dramatic momentum of the show, but he’s criticized himself for including lyrics that sound good but are not necessarily words that a young woman learning English would know.^[4]

6 “Edelweiss”—The Sound of Music

Most people have seen the classic 1965 movie musical The Sound of Music. But for those who haven’t, it may come as a shock to hear that the sweet song “Edelweiss” is from this Rogers and Hammerstein show.

In the context of the show, “Edelweiss” is sung by Captain von Trapp as a sentimental goodbye to his homeland of Austria, as he is being forced out by the impending Nazis. “Edelweiss” is a simple but sweet tune that does such a good job of sounding like an old Austrian folk song many people actually believe it is. There are even rumors that the song used to be the national anthem of Austria. This isn’t true. The song was written over 10 years after the end of World War II, and while the edelweiss flower is still a symbol of Austria, it’s only thanks to the musical.^[5]

5 “The Lady Is a Tramp”—Babes in Arms

This is the second song on this list to come from the 1937 musical Babes in Arms. Arguably even more famous than “My Funny Valentine,” “The Lady Is a Tramp” was made famous by Frank Sinatra’s recording in the 1950s.

The song inspired the title of Walt Disney’s The Lady and the Tramp and has been parodied by the Spice Girls, Glee, Star Trek, and more. It recently regained popularity thanks to Tony Bennett and Lady Gaga’s duet version in 2011, which topped charts in the UK and Japan.^[6]

4 “Total Eclipse of the Heart”

Okay, this one isn’t from a musical, but it was originally written for one.

Much has been said about the history of Bonnie Tyler’s “Total Eclipse of the Heart.” Most famous, Meat Loaf openly complained that composer Jim Steinman had originally written the song for him, not Tyler. Steinman had previously written for Meat Loaf’s breakout hit album Bat Out of Hell, to great success. However, newfound fame did not treat Meat Loaf well, and Steinman was allegedly advised to leave Meat Loaf and find a new singer to write for.

So Steinman paired up with Welsh singer Bonnie Tyler, reusing one of his old songs that was meant for a musical version of Nosferatu. Though ultimately the musical never materialized, “Total Eclipse of the Heart” was originally meant to be a vampire love song. Steinman says, “If anyone listens to the lyrics, they’re really like vampire lines. It’s all about the darkness, the power of darkness, and love’s place in the dark.”

According to Tyler, that’s why the music video is shot in a gothic former asylum. They were trying to keep creepy vampire vibes within the song, even though it was no longer part of a larger plot.^[7]

3 “One Night in Bangkok”—Chess

“One Night in Bangkok” is particularly interesting because it really doesn’t work or make sense outside of the context of the show. But somehow, it still became a hit, even though the show didn’t.

Chess the musical started in 1984 as a concept album by Tim Rice and ABBA composers Benny Andersson and Bjorn Ulvaeus. The plot revolves around a chess game during the Cold War, with a Soviet on one side and an American on the other. Unfortunately, when the show transferred to Broadway in 1988, it was a financial flop, losing $6.6 million.

However, one song broke through to the mainstream. “One Night in Bangkok” is a testament to the Thai city’s reputation as the place to be for nightlife and adventure (and chess). While the choruses describe Bangkok as exciting and inspiring, the Americans in the show claim the city is “muddy” and less interesting than a game of chess.

In a turn of events no one could have predicted, the single version of the song topped the charts in countries around the world, including South Africa, The Netherlands, Australia, and the United States. Interestingly, “One Night in Bangkok” is banned in Thailand itself, as it is deemed to “cause misunderstanding about Thai society and show disrespect towards Buddhism.”^[8]

2 “Send in the Clowns”—A Little Night Music

Often hailed as one of the saddest songs ever written, “Send in the Clowns” is a heartbreaking admission of being defeated by life. “Isn’t it rich / Aren’t we a pair” kicks off the number, which comes directly after the main character, Desiree, is rejected by the man who chased her throughout her youth. Now that she’s ready to settle down, her ex is already married with a child.

The forced joviality in the lyrics is part of what makes it so devastating. With everything lost, Desiree has to laugh at her folly and stupidity. If only she would have realized what she wanted years ago, back when she had the opportunity.

The clowns in the title and chorus do not refer to literal clowns. Composer Stephen Sondheim says that he meant it to be a theater reference meaning, “‘If the show isn’t going well, let’s send in the clowns’; in other words, ‘let’s do the jokes.’” Desiree asks where the clowns are now that everything has gone wrong. It ends with the line “Don’t bother / They’re here,” as Desiree and her ex have been the clowns the whole time for not seizing the moment when they had it.

The lyrics aren’t so specific that they only apply to the context of the show. Judy Collins’s recorded version hit the Billboard Top 100 for 11 weeks, and Frank Sinatra added it to his 1973 album Ol’ Blue Eyes Is Back. Since then, it has been used in media across the world, perhaps most famously in the 2019 blockbuster film Joker.^[9]

1 “Til There Was You”—The Music Man

Written by Meredith Willson for the 1957 musical The Music Man, “Til There Was You” skyrocketed to the public’s eye thanks to a chart-topping cover by The Beatles.

If you didn’t know that this tune was from a musical, don’t feel bad: Neither did Paul McCartney for a while. He grew up with the Peggy Lee cover of the song and has said that he had “no idea until much later” that it was from The Music Man, sung as a love ballad by the main character Marion. The Beatles’ recording helped cement the band as one that could appeal to all ages and genres, not just young girls.

Willson’s wife has said that the estate has received more money from The Beatles cover royalties than they have from the actual show itself!^[10]