When you hear the phrase “10 things internet,” you probably expect a wild mix of quirky facts, absurd claims, and downright bizarre stories that somehow made their way onto our feeds. Unfortunately, many of these so‑called “facts” are nothing more than elaborate hoaxes that keep resurfacing despite being thoroughly debunked. In this roundup we’ll dissect each one, give you the real scoop, and sprinkle in a little humor along the way.

10 Things Internet Myths Debunked

10 Go To Sleep!

There’s a long‑standing rumor floating around the web that the U.S. Food and Drug Administration supposedly gave the green light to a tranquilizer dart gun that can instantly put children to sleep. The story goes that a frazzled parent could simply aim the device at a restless kid, pull the trigger, and a dart would pierce the neck, sending the youngster straight into dreamland. For any sleep‑deprived parent, the idea sounds like a miracle solution to those endless bedtime battles.

In reality, the notion is utterly ludicrous. The FDA would never approve a weapon that essentially turns a child into a target for a sleep‑inducing projectile. Beyond the ethical nightmare, the logistics are absurd. So, while the rumor persists, the only viable remedy is something less lethal—perhaps letting Samuel L. Jackson read the irreverent bedtime book Go the F**k to Sleep aloud. That might just scare the little ones into surrendering to slumber.

9 Er, No, Stay Awake!

Back in 2017, a sensational article from the dubious “World Daily News Report” claimed that a morgue employee in Beaumont, Texas, was accidentally cremated because he fell asleep on a stretcher. According to the fabricated report, the exhausted worker was mistaken for a deceased patient, carted to the crematory, and incinerated at temperatures ranging between 1,400 and 1,800 degrees Fahrenheit, turning him to ash before anyone realized the mistake.

Fact‑checkers quickly exposed the story as a complete fabrication, noting that the “World Daily News Report” is notorious for sensationalist nonsense. Nevertheless, the tale keeps resurfacing on social media, serving as a bizarre cautionary reminder—never nap on the job, even if the rumor is entirely false.

8 Twinkie Time

Everyone’s heard the legendary claim that Twinkies are practically immortal, capable of surviving for years—some even say seven—without spoiling, and that they could outlast a nuclear apocalypse. The myth has persisted for decades, feeding on the snack’s reputation as a hyper‑processed, shelf‑stable treat.

The truth is far less glamorous: the official shelf life of a mass‑produced Twinkie is only about 25 days. After roughly three weeks on a store shelf, any unsold Twinkie is supposed to be pulled and discarded. In short, these golden sponge cakes don’t last months, let alone years, and the internet’s obsession with their supposed eternity is purely fictional.

7 Reject THIS!

College admissions are stressful, and in 2015 a viral Tumblr post claimed a high‑school senior named Siobhan O’Dell had been rejected by Duke University—so she fired back a rejection letter of her own, essentially “rejecting” Duke’s rejection. The story escalated when the post alleged that Duke responded by sending another rejection, creating a comical back‑and‑forth of denial letters.

Investigation revealed the entire saga to be fabricated. No such correspondence ever existed, and the original Tumblr post was simply a prank. While the rumor is amusing, it’s entirely fictional—no one can truly reject a university’s rejection with a rejection of their own.

6 Really Milking It…

Ever wondered why chocolate milk is brown? Some internet lore claims that the color comes from cow’s blood, suggesting that regular milk is “rejected” and turned into chocolate milk after being mixed with blood. Other versions assert that chocolate milk is produced by brown‑coated cows. Both explanations are wildly inaccurate.

The reality is far simpler: chocolate milk is made by blending ordinary cow’s milk with real cocoa and sweeteners. No blood, no brown cows—just milk and chocolate combined in a perfectly harmless way. Despite the persistence of these outlandish theories, the science is clear and the rumors remain unfounded.

5 Like Symptoms

A persistent myth claims that the flu vaccine actually contains live flu virus, meaning you’re inoculated with the very illness it’s meant to prevent. The rumor suggests that any post‑vaccination soreness or fever is a sign you’ve contracted the flu from the shot.In truth, flu vaccines contain inactivated (killed) virus particles that cannot cause illness. The mild side effects some people experience—like low‑grade fever or aches—are simply the immune system’s normal response to preparing defenses against the real flu. The CDC and WHO have debunked the myth repeatedly, but it still circulates online.

4 Cadbury Controversy

Cadbury’s chocolates are beloved worldwide, yet a disturbing rumor alleges that a Cadbury employee was arrested for adding HIV‑infected blood to the company’s sweets, supposedly aiming to infect millions of consumers. The claim sparked outrage and fear across social platforms.

Investigations show the story is entirely false—no Cadbury worker was ever arrested, and no evidence exists of blood being added to any product. This isn’t the first time a similar accusation has been leveled at a popular brand; similar rumors have targeted Pepsi and mango‑flavored drinks. In every case, the allegations have been baseless.

3 Rooted In Rumor

Root canals are dreaded dental procedures, and an alarming rumor suggests they dramatically increase the risk of terminal cancer. The claim implies that undergoing a root canal could set you on a path toward a lethal diagnosis.

Medical experts confirm there is no link between root canal therapy and cancer. In fact, maintaining good oral health, including necessary procedures like root canals, is associated with overall better health outcomes and longevity. The rumor is wholly unfounded and should be dismissed.

2 Spider Stupidity

This legend predates the internet but has endured through forums and social media. Supposedly, a woman in the 1950s kept an elaborate bouffant hairstyle for so long that it became a spider’s home. The story goes that the spider gave birth, and the newborn spider crawled down her hair and bit her while she slept, resulting in a fatal bite.

There is no documented case of a bouffant becoming a spider’s nest, nor any record of a fatal spider bite occurring in that manner. While certain spider species can be dangerous, the specific scenario described is entirely fictional.

The myth has evolved over decades, shifting from bouffants to hippie hair in the ’60s and dreadlocks in the ’90s, yet each iteration remains a fabricated cautionary tale about neglecting personal hygiene.

1 Spider Gum

Bubble Yum, the iconic chewing gum of the ’70s and ’80s, fell victim to a bizarre rumor claiming it was made from spider eggs, legs, or even webs. The tale suggested that the gum’s “chewy” texture was due to these arachnid ingredients.

Legal battles ensued, with the manufacturer reportedly spending over $100,000 defending the brand against the false claim. Despite the hefty legal expenses, the rumor persisted, illustrating how stubborn misinformation can be.

In reality, Bubble Yum contains standard confectionery ingredients—sugar, gum base, and flavorings—nothing to do with spiders. The internet continues to recycle the myth, but the facts remain clear and spider‑free.

Swears are fun and all, but, similar to what Cookie Monster says about cookies, “They are sometimes words.” Now, of course, every family and social situation is different—some people don’t care if the F-bomb is their child’s first word or if sh–t is uttered by students.

But generally speaking, we refrain from swearing in front of kids, those who we are trained to respect (elders, teachers, community leaders, etc.), and you know, like, in church, synagogue—whatever it may be for you. Still, the urge to let an expletive fly is sometimes so strong that you can’t help it. You just have to say it.

If this is you and you are the caring type who believes that maybe you should stop using such language, there is hope. History’s wordsmiths have blessed us with creative alternatives to Carlin’s infamous seven (and more). Here are ten creative expletives that aren’t swears at all.

Related: 10 Amazing Ancient Insults

10 Sugar-Honey-Ice Tea

We start this list with sugar-honey-ice tea. It’s a nonsense expletive, meant to express frustration over a particular event. Stub your toe? “Sugar-honey-ice tea!” Did your pen explode in your pocket? “Sugar-honey-ice tea!” You get the gist. It’s best used as a replacement for sh-t, though we imagine that “son of a dirty wh–re!” would better grasp the emotion behind it.

9 Shut the Front Door!

This dreadful expression has been around for a long time, and I’d rather people say the real thing than use it. I honestly can’t stand it. However, it’s creative enough in that it sounds like you’re about to say “f–k up,” but you replace it with “front door.” Emphasize the f sound to get a rise from your parents and then surprise them with the non-offensive phrase. What are they going to do? Ground you? If they ground you for suggesting you maintain privacy by closing an entrance, they can shut the feck up.

8 Holy Swear Word, Batman!

The original Batman television series (Adam West and Burt Ward) is campy, fun, and a relic of the 1960s. Several subsequent action shows and parodies have been based on the show’s aesthetic (Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy, anyone?). We’ve adopted some of the series language quirks without even realizing where it comes from.

One example is Robin’s ability to turn “Holy sh–t!” into a running list of contextual, creative alternatives. All he does is replace the swear with something relevant to his situation. And you can use them, too! Here are some of our favorites:

• Holy Split Seconds
• Holy Venezuela
• Holy Bowler
• Holy Unrefillable Prescriptions
• Holy Frying Towels
• Holy Slipped Discs

I mean, there are so many of them. Pop culture has given us these gems; let us not allow them to go to waste.

7 Nut-hook and Tripe-Visaged Rascal

Good old Bill Shakespeare; leave it to him to come up with a creative swear or insult and for us to ignore its genius. He is very niche. Anyway, there’s one in particular that we like to throw around: nut-hook. You wouldn’t say nut-hook into the wind; you would undoubtedly direct it to someone, possibly at them.

A nut-hook is not what your mind would go toward these days, you dirty birds. It is not a hook that graces the male genitalia. It doesn’t even come close to that. It is:

1. A police officer or constable
2. A thief
3. The hook at the end of a pole that pulls branches down for easier nut harvesting

Pretty innocuous, right? Well, in this case, it’s not. Its original intent in Shakespeare’s Henry V was to call someone a pig (the derogatory term for a cop).

Doll Tearsheet (who is pregnant) is arrested, accused of murder, and she’s just not having it. So she calls the arresting officer a nut-hook. To add to the offense of the passage, she also calls the other woman in the scene a “damned tripe-visaged rascal.” Translation: flabby-faced moron.

It seems pretty tame these days, I know. So we are giving you permission to call someone a nut-hook and imply that they are a hook that hooks onto um…balls. A creative replacement for the usual sh–t head or d–k face, I guess.

6 “Son of a Nutcracker!”

Since it’s winter, we might as well include this one on the list. You may recognize “son of a nutcracker” as Buddy the Elf’s response to getting hit in the face by a snowball. Will Farrell’s delivery of the line is in every way, shape, and form “son of a b–tch,” but the joke’s on PG-13 movie ratings! It’s a nutcracker (and so the movie rating stays at PG).

Fun Will Farrell fact, while we’re on it. He recently produced a Netflix docuseries featuring Nicholas Cage called History of Swear Words. No, they don’t say “son of a nutcracker,” but they do go into the etymology of a rainbow of expletives.

5 Dad-Sizzle and Dadgum

No, you are not implying that someone’s dad sizzles like a piece of bacon, and Snoop Dogg didn’t come up with it. Dad-sizzle is a stand-in for “g–d damn.” In terms of levels of anger, dad-sizzle is pretty high up there. So if you were alive in the 1800s and heard someone say this, you knew they meant business.

Other swear alternatives, like Dadgum, use the “dad” prefix, and all mean some variation of “damn.” Dad-blasted, for instance, is used to indicate frustration, surprise, and anger, though it’s not as angry as dad-sizzle.

4 Alan Rickman!

The late and great Alan Rickman was best known in the 21st century for playing Professor Snape in the Harry Potter franchise. The role successfully launched a Millennial generation cult following and added to a long list of film achievements, including Die Hard, Sweeney Todd, Dogma, and Galaxy Quest. And for some reason, his name turned into an expletive.

We can’t pinpoint the origin of shouting “Alan Rickman!” when you’ve stubbed your toe, hit your funny bone, or hurt yourself in other humorous and inconvenient ways, but it exists. And I guess there’s enough oomph to his name (that k drills the pain home) to get your point across. We would assume what you want to say is “Mother f–ker!”

But Rickman is not the only celebrity who has the honor of being a swear. “Kelly Clarkson” was screamed by Steve Carrell in 40-Year-Old Virgin during the chest hair waxing scene. Judas Priest, the British heavy metal band, has been a popular swear alternative for a long time. Even Mr. Slave from South Park conjures Judas Priest instead of the Christian figure.

3 Barnacles!

If you grew up watching Spongebob, you know this one very well. Almost every main character in the series uses it at least once, and it has proved to be incredibly versatile. That means that it could mean—pardon the censorship—sh–t, f–k, damn, d–k (when they call someone a barnacle head), etc. Barnacles may not be a popular alternative to anyone born before 1990, but anyone who was a parent in 1999 and on should be familiar enough with “barnacles” to get it.

As we know, this isn’t the only made-up swear in the Spongebob universe. If it weren’t for the creativity behind such words, Spongebob would be an entirely different show. Other popular swears include:

• Fish paste
• What in the name of Davy Jones’ locker?
• Tartar sauce
• Jumping jellyfish

However, the Spongebob swear that takes the cake is the 11th bad word: *dolphin noises*. If it weren’t for the fact that making dolphin noises is so unnatural for humans, it’d take the number three slot instead of barnacles.

2 Heavens to Betsy

Another oldie, but a goodie. Heavens to Betsy falls into the blasphemous category (100+ years ago), originating sometime between the late 19th century and the start of World War I. At the heart of the phrase, it means “for God’s sake” or, if said with more emphasis, “Jesus Christ.” The idiom is far from offensive nowadays and raises eyebrows for how antiquated it sounds.

1 Bratchny and Skitebird

If you’ve read A Clockwork Orange, you know that it’s a literary trip. The protagonist, who is actually an antagonist to some extent (his dystopian teenage angst and delinquency is his own worst enemy), Alex, is a disaster—and not one of those lovable disasters either. Part of you feels like he should receive greater punishment than he does, and yet, at the same time, you can’t help but feel for him as he’s forced to watch the disgusting acts of history.

If his character arc isn’t enough, elements of British slang and a slew of made-up, Russian-inspired words confuse the heck out of the reader. One of which is bratchny, which means, roughly, bastard, and another is skitebird, which means sh–t head.

Saying bratchy and skitebird probably won’t get you into a fight since no one will know what the eff you’re talking about. It’s obscure. But for an English student or Anthony Burgess fan, they should get the hint that you’re upset with something or someone.

Other naughty words and expletives in A Clockwork Orange include:

• Lubbilubbing for sex
• Pan-handle for erection
• Sharries for butt

Have fun with those, droogs.