Being a member of the British royal family isn’t as easy as it looks. You can’t be political, controversial, or show emotion. And any slipup you do make will be all over the news across the globe in very short order.

The queen mother’s motto was, “Never complain, never explain,” but when words fail, actions can speak louder, and those actions can be passive-aggressive or just plain ruthless. Here are ten examples of when a royal let their guard down.

10 Taking The Saudi Prince For A Ride

Queen Elizabeth II loves to drive. She learned during World War II as second subaltern in the Women’s Auxiliary Territorial Service as a truck driver. As queen, she is not required to hold a driver’s license.

Former Saudi ambassador Sherard Cowper-Coles recalled a visit made by Crown Prince Abdullah in 1998.^[1] After lunch at Balmoral, the queen suggested a tour of the Scottish estate and directed her guest toward the royal Land Rover. The crown prince sat down in the passenger side and was shocked to see the queen position herself in the driver’s seat. She started the engine and tore around the narrow roads, chatting away to the prince as they went over the rough terrain. Eventually, the panicky prince was forced to ask her—through his interpreter—to slow down. It may be a coincidence, but at the time, women were banned from driving in Saudi Arabia.

The prince survived his spin with the queen, and in June 2018, Saudi Arabia’s driving ban was finally lifted.

9 The Trial Of Paul Burrell

Paul Burrell (left above) was personal footman to Queen Elizabeth II and then went on to work for Princess Diana. The two formed a close bond, and Diana allegedly referred to him as “my Rock.” After her death in August 1997, Burrell quickly rose to fame. He became a regular on TV and took on a high-profile role with the charity set up in her name.

On January 18, 2001, Police raided Burrell’s home and found 342 items belonging to Diana hidden in the attic. The haul included signed CDs, clothing, personal letters, and photo albums. Burrell strongly denied any wrongdoing. He was charged with theft, and the trial began in October 2002.

The world’s press were out in force to report on the story. However, on day nine, the case was adjourned. The judge, Mrs. Justice Rafferty, sent the jurors home with no explanation. The following day, they were again told to stay home. Meanwhile, the queen, who had been unaware of the case, had seen a news report about the trial. She then recalled Burrell telling her that he had Diana’s possessions stored safely in his home.^[2] The police were informed, and Prosecutor William Boyce, QC, told the court there was no longer a realistic prospect of conviction. Burrell was free to go.

Outside the court, he famously said: “The queen came through for me.”

This brought an abrupt end to what many predicted would be a lengthy trial full of royal secrets. A spokesman for Buckingham Palace said, “There is no question of the Queen interfering.” Diana’s possessions were returned to her family, and Burrell continued with his media career. The royal family have never commented on the case of Diana’s missing things.

8 The Queen Puts Mrs. Thatcher In Her Place

Margaret Thatcher became the first female prime minister of the UK. Together, Queen Elizabeth II and Mrs. Thatcher were the most powerful women in the country. The queen was often irritated by Thatcher’s habit of turning up early for their meetings and had been heard referring to her as “that woman.” When Thatcher suggested that she and the queen should match their outfits for an occasion, Buckingham Palace responded: “The Queen does not notice what other people are wearing.”

The Commonwealth countries were important to Queen Elizabeth—having spent much time on tours there. Thatcher saw it as an outdated institution. Matters came to a head in the 1980s as people became uneasy about apartheid in South Africa.^[3] The queen wanted to impose trade sanctions as a way of keeping the Commonwealth united. Thatcher disagreed.

In 1986, a headline appeared in The Sunday Times : “Queen dismayed by ‘uncaring’ Thatcher.”

The article went on to detail the rift between them. The Palace issued a denial, and the queen personally telephoned Thatcher. This was puzzling for the editor of The Sunday Times, as his source for the story was Michael Shea—the queen’s press secretary. It was unthinkable that Shea would have spoken without royal approval.

Despite this, Elizabeth grew to respect Thatcher. After Thatcher’s death in 2013, the queen made a last-minute decision to attend her funeral, even though duty did not require her to.

7 Royal Nanny Out In The Cold

The first rule of working for the royal family is: Keep your mouth shut. In 1932, Marion Crawford was employed as nanny to Princesses Elizabeth and Margaret. Their privacy ended forever when their uncle, Edward VII, abdicated to marry Mrs. Simpson, making their father King. The family moved into Buckingham Palace, and “Crawfie,” as Marion was known, went with them.

Over the years, Crawfie became such a trusted servant to the royals that she stayed in service until 1948, when Princess Elizabeth became engaged to Phillip Mountbatten.

In 1949 the American Ladies’ Home Journal approached her for a piece they were writing on royal children.^[4] Queen Elizabeth The Queen Mother (aka the mother of Elizabeth and Margaret) thought it would be a good way for Crawfie to earn some extra money. There was a strict understanding, however, that she would be anonymous.

The article was full of sweet anecdotes from the royal nursery and perfect for the American public. But when the magazine hit the stands, there was one glaring mistake—Marion Crawford was named as the interviewee. The queen mother was furious and instantly blamed Crawfie, saying that she had “gone off her head.”

The family severed all ties with Crawfie, who moved back to Scotland and never got over the rejection. She suffered from depression and attempted suicide twice. She kept the letters from the queen mother giving her consent to speak to the magazine locked away. Even though they could have cleared her name, she refused to release them.

Marion Crawford died in a nursing home in 1988, still hoping to hear from the royal family. In her will, she requested that all personal letters be returned to the Palace for safekeeping. The royal family have never mentioned her again or the role she played in shaping the future queen.

6 Diana’s Rage

After his divorce from Diana, Charles employed Alexandra “Tiggy” Legge-Bourke, a well-connected young woman, to help care for his sons. Tiggy’s job was to be a fun older sister rather than stern nanny, and she quickly formed a close bond with the princes. Their mother was not impressed with Tiggy’s role. Tensions grew between the two households, and soon, Diana began to suspect, wrongly, that Tiggy and Charles were having an affair. Diana seized upon a false rumor doing the rounds that Tiggy had gotten an abortion. Diana made an appearance at a staff party in December 1996, strolled up to Tiggy, and allegedly said: “So sorry about the baby.”

Tiggy instructed top libel lawyer Peter Carter-Ruck to write to Diana’s solicitors demanding an apology for the offending remark.^[5] Tiggy continued to work for Charles until 1999, when she left to get married. She has remained close to Princes William and Harry.

5 The Attempted Kidnap Of Princess Anne

Princess Anne is known to be a strong character, and this was tested to the limit when Ian Ball attempted to kidnap Queen Elizabeth II’s only daughter.^[6] On March 20, 1974, the princess, her husband Mark Phillips, a bodyguard, and Anne’s lady-in-waiting were traveling in a royal limousine. Ball, a 26-year-old unemployed man from London, drove his car into the royals’ vehicle and then jumped out, brandishing two handguns. Anne’s bodyguard approached him and was shot in the shoulder. Ball then tried to get into the car, shouting, “Open or I’ll shoot!” Anne and Phillips tried to hold the door shut.

Anne’s chauffeur approached Ball, only to be shot in the chest. Ball was now free to reach into the car, and he seized Anne’s wrist while Phillips—a captain in the British Army—clamped onto her waist.

“Please come out,” pleaded Ball.

“Not bloody likely!” was Anne’s reply.

Incredibly, Ball shot a further two people—a police officer and motorist who tried to help. Finally, a passerby punched Ball in the head. As police arrived, Anne bizarrely said to Ball, “Go on, now’s your chance.” Ball fled toward a park but was caught and arrested.

On searching Ball’s rented vehicle, police found handcuffs, Valium, and a ransom note addressed to the queen. The note demanded that £2 million be delivered in person by the queen and stated, “Anne will be shot dead.”

Ball was sentenced to life in a psychiatric unit. All those who came to Anne’s aid survived and were rewarded. Anne later described her experience with Ball as “a very irritating conversation.”

4 The Death Of A Princess

On August 31, 1997, Princess Diana was killed in a car accident in Paris. The news of her sudden death caused shock around the world. The royal family was on their summer break in Scotland. Apart from a short statement, little was heard from the royals about the tragedy.

In London, crowds flocked toward her home, Kensington Palace. People laid flowers and wept openly in the streets, and there was a growing mood of anger toward the royals. Some people began to turn their attention to Buckingham Palace, where the flag was still flying at full mast. To some, this was symbolic of how Diana had been treated in life.

In reality, the queen’s flag, called the Royal Standard, is never flown at half-mast, as it represents the monarchy itself, which is continuous.^[7] When a monarch dies, there is instantly another to take their place. There was no Royal Standard flying from Buckingham Palace at that time, as the queen wasn’t in residence. Instead, it was the Union Jack, which is only flown at half-mast when a royal styled as “HRH” dies. Diana, as ex-wife of Prince Charles, had lost her HRH status in their divorce.

The media picked up on the public mood, and stories about the coldness of the royal family began to appear along with scenes of public anger. Headlines screamed, “Where is the Queen?” The Royal family stayed on holiday, and the flag stayed at full mast.

The night before the funeral, the queen made an unexpected speech on TV and paid tribute to Diana. Finally, on the morning of the funeral—without announcement—the flag was lowered to half-mast and stayed there until midnight as a last-minute mark of respect.

3 Farewell, Britannia

Some of Queen Elizabeth II’s happiest days were spent with her family on the royal yacht, Britannia. Launched in 1953, she toured the world and hosted many famous guests, including Winston Churchill and Nelson Mandela. Britannia was also used for the queen’s private family holidays and was the place she felt most at peace.

In 1997, Tony Blair was the new prime minister. In a cost-cutting exercise, he blocked a £17 million refurbishing bill for the Britannia. At the time, the royals were being criticized for the cost of works at Windsor Castle after a fire. Blair made it clear that he would prefer the money to be spent on public services. The royals are not allowed to air political views, and so in December 1997, Britiannia was decommissioned.^[8]

Queen Elizabeth and Princess Anne stood at the dock and openly wept as Britannia was sent to become a tourist attraction next to a shopping mall in Edinburgh. Even 14 years later, the loss was still felt by the royal family. In an interview, Prince Phillip commented, “She was sound as a bell and she could have gone on for another 50 years.” This may also explain why, when Prince William married Kate Middleton in 2011, the only former prime minister not to receive an invitation was one Tony Blair.

2 An Awkward Meeting

Queen Elizabeth II was very close to her cousin, Lord Mountbatten, who became a mentor to the young Prince Charles. In 1979, Mountbatten was killed when a terrorist bomb exploded on his boat in Ireland. His grandson, 14, and a local boy, aged 15, were also killed. The IRA claimed responsibility for the attack.

Martin McGuinness was a former IRA leader who later became deputy first minister of Northern Ireland.^[9] In June 2012, the queen made history when, on a visit to Belfast, she met and shook hands in public with McGuinness. On their second meeting in 2016, when he asked her how she was, she responded, “Well, I’m still alive.”

1 Sitting Pretty

Marrying into the royal family can be tricky. Even if you are accepted, your family may not quite match their requirements. Famously, many in-laws quietly fade into the background. (Thomas Markle, take note.)

When Kate Middleton married Prince William, her family were thrust into the spotlight. They appeared to be a loving and close unit, in contrast to Prince Charles, who could be awkward and distant. After the arrival of his grandchildren, Charles began to feel that he was being edged out of their life. Matters came to a head when the couple chose to spend Christmas with her parents, avoiding the traditional meet at Sandringham.

Aware of his disapproval, Charles’s staff began to freeze out the Middletons, which upset William.^[10] News of the rift reached the queen, who was reportedly very fond of Kate’s family. A few weeks later in September 2016, the Middletons were invited to stay at Balmoral as personal guests of the queen.

The press turned out to photograph the royal group as they drove to a shooting party and were treated to the sight of the queen behind the wheel with Kate Middleton next to her as guest of honor. Her security team were relegated to the back seats. Game, set, and match to her Majesty.

I am an avid reader of and thought I would try my hand at a list. I have an interest in the royal family and history, but my first attempt may be a bit clunky. I am keen to improve, so feedback is gratefully accepted.

Tobacco companies get a bad rap, presumably because they make profits by giving people all sorts of cancer. This article probably isn’t going to help their case, since we’re talking about nothing but the horrible depths they’ve sunk to keep cancer profitable, but it sure is interesting.

10. Free Cigarettes For Soldiers

Smoking and the military have such a close relationship, the subject has its own Wikipedia page. Soldiers love themselves some tobacco-based produce. But have you ever wondered why? Well, it may have something to do with the fact that tobacco companies long ago realized that the military represented a huge potential market, full of highly-stressed individuals with many hours of downtime.

Realizing this, some tobacco companies lobbied to have cigarettes made a standard part of a soldier’s rations, which said tobacco companies gladly provided for free. Though this may seem nice on the surface, the move was an incredibly shrewd one since, although they did give away a lot of their stock for free, they ensured that soldiers would be hooked and buying their brand, long after they left the military.

9. Suppressing The World Health Organization

The World Health Organization is kind of a big deal when it comes to matters of world health. Obviously. The WHO is incredibly powerful and respected, and able to affect change on an almost-global scale.

And tobacco companies couldn’t care less about any of that jazz. In secret documents leaked to the WHO, it was revealed that several massive tobacco companies have been undermining the efforts of the WHO for years. The range and scope of the tactics used is pretty staggering, but in a nutshell, tobacco companies threw money at things that threatened their profits until they went away. The things they wanted to go away, by the by, were the people trying to cure cancer, which makes them the exact opposite of Bill Gates.

8. Trying To Take Down China

It’s a pretty safe assumption that China will eventually run the world; sorry, Beyonce. However, standing up to the ever-present Chinese menace is a lone hero: big tobacco companies. As reported by Reuters, tobacco companies in China have deliberately resisted raising their prices, and even infiltrated anti-smoking groups, to ensure that Chinese citizens remain hooked and in turn get all of the cancer.

If that’s not evil enough for you, they’ve also refused to put health warning on their packs. Then again, if people don’t realize that the things that taste like kissing an old person’s couch are bad for you, they probably don’t know how to read anyway. Thanks for giving us a fighting chance, tobacco!

7. Paying Scientists To Play Down The Link Between Smoking And Alzheimer’s

The list of diseases and physical maladies that smoking helps cause is so long, the physical exertion of writing them all down would give us early-onset arthritis, and who wants that? Suffice to say, it’s real real long.

However, one disease that has constantly emerged in the papers is Alzheimer’s. And yet, every now and again, a paper would emerge that suggested that smoking was somehow beneficial to people suffering from the condition. When someone actually investigated this claim, they found that every single person or scientist that had made such a claim had undisclosed links to the tobacco industry. Because of course they did.

6. Making Smoking Fashionable

Smoking is cool and everyone knows it, because there’s nothing cooler than having erectile dysfunction and smelly eyebrows. Back in the heyday of smoking, Lucky Strike Cigarettes noticed that sales of their brand were lagging. So they hired one Edward Bernays to help them. Bernays noticed that Lucky Strike’s packaging was an incredibly garish green color. Realizing that people are largely idiots, he concluded that the ugly color was the reason people weren’t smoking Luckies. When Lucky Strike refused to change their packaging, Bernays decided that he’d simply make green fashionable.

Which he did, by throwing a green-themed ball. When all the biggest movers and shakers of the day were pictured wearing green, sales of Lucky Strike brand cigarettes shot up, simply because green was now awesome, because pretty people were dressed in green one night. Again, people are idiots.

5. Trying To Defraud The Government Of A Billion Dollars

Though smoking arguably causes the government untold billions in healthcare costs, it also makes it a fair chunk of change in taxes, which pay for things like roads, hospitals and policemen. Then again, it also probably pays for the things that cure all the people dying of cancer because of smoking, but we should probably digress before our heads begin to hurt.

Over in Canada, a former tobacco executive, Stan Smith, was caught red-handed conspiring to smuggle millions of cigarettes, the estimated tax on which would have been in excess of a billion dollars. Don’t worry though, because Mr Smith definitely got his just deserts, by which we mean he sold out all of his co-workers, and got off scot-free. Justice!

4. Targeting Children, Then Denying It

The argument about whether tobacco companies target children has always been hotly contested, by which we mean tobacco companies have been shady as hell about it, while hiding behind a constant shield of highly-paid lawyers.

For example, it was constantly argued that Joe Camel (a spokescamel for Camel Cigarettes) was aimed at children. Though Camel Cigarettes naturally denied the claim, critics countered with the fact that Mr. Camel was equally as recognizable to children as Mickey Mouse, and that he rode a skateboard. Camel responded by telling the critics to shut the hell up. Because that’s how you win an argument.

3. Convincing Women To Smoke, For Feminism

Back in the early days of smoking, the market was almost entirely limited to men. However, this wasn’t an ideal situation for tobacco companies, as their potential consumer base was effectively cut in half. They needed a hero, they needed a cowboy. They needed Edward Bernays. Again.

Bernays quickly got on the case, by leaking a story to the press that, during a parade, some women would be lighting “torches of freedom,” to pave the way for female equality. What he didn’t tell them was that said women were stooges, paid by a tobacco company to smoke in public. When the images of said women hit the papers, millions of women were exposed to the message that, in order for them to be equal to men, they had to smoke. So they did, because advertising totally works, if you’re willing to sell your soul to Satan.

2. Supporting Human Rights Abuse

With all the damage and death that smoking causes, how they’re made is oftentimes ignored. However, one human rights group decided to look into how British American Tobacco’s cigarettes were made, and found that they directly profited the brutal military dictatorship in Burma.

BAT countered the claims, by stating that their factory represented valuable jobs to the Burmese people, to which human rights groups responded by saying that BAT were only paying said workers 17 pence (25 cents) a day, or a third of what other comparable jobs in the area were paying. BAT quickly bowed out, and withdrew from the country.

1. Refusing To Inform People About How Dangerous Smoking Is

Nowadays, it’s virtually a universally-accepted fact that smoking is bad for your health. However, saying your product kills people isn’t a savvy business move, which is why a number of tobacco companies simply downplayed the hell out of, or outright lied about, exactly how dangerous their products were.

For example, they massively downplayed the dangers of “low-tar” cigarettes, advertising them as less dangerous than their full-tar (read: manly) cigarettes. Turns out, this was a complete and utter lie; saying low-tar cigarettes are less dangerous than full-tar ones, is like saying a shotgun blast to the chest is less harmful than one to the face.

When the government demanded that such companies issue full and frank public apologies at their own expense, Big Tobacco fought the decision so hard, that the first time you probably heard about it was right now, when we mentioned it in this article.

Cats aren’t dogs; they’re not man’s best friend. But while it may seem like your cat is an a-hole, they’re an a-hole with excuses at least. From treating you like crap to torturing wildlife, here are 10 things your cat does explained.

10. Sleeping All Day

Cats sleep an obscene amount of time by human standards. After the 24-hour sleep of early kittenhood, the average cat will sleep 16 hours a day (until they get old, when they start sleeping more). Why are they so damn lazy? Because they don’t sleep as deep as us humans. 

Unlike us with our clearly defined cycles of rapid/non-rapid eye movement in sleep, culminating in deep REM sleep, cats nap in short periods of slow wave. In other words, they spend most of their time in the shallows of sleep, sleeping deeply for only five minute periods throughout the day. 

Of course, as crepuscular animals, they also have to sleep all day to be active at dawn and dusk. Another explanation, given they evolved in hot climates, is that cats sleep all day to regulate their body temperature.

9. Staring

Be it the world outside the window, the wall, or just into space, cats are big starers. It doesn’t help that their eyes are enormous in relation to their bodies, or that they blink at a fraction of the rate we do (twice per minute vs. our 15-20 times per minute). It’s an unnerving quality to have in a pet.

But cats’ vision differs from ours in ways that sheds light on this question. For one thing, they have a slightly wider field of vision (200 degrees vs our 180 degrees), and an ability to zone in on the tiniest movement. Meanwhile, their visual acuity isn’t as good as ours, meaning we can see more detail at a distance. 

Explanations vary for why cats stare so much. Maybe what to us looks like a wall is, to cats with their super hearing, a complex and stimulating soundboard of pipes, insects, and rodents. It could also have to do with hunting practice, for which patience and focus are key. Probably the least assholey reason, however, is love. Based on multiple studies, Japanese researchers concluded that cats only stare at humans they trust. They also found that, like dogs, cats can notice and follow your gaze.

8. Peeing Outside the Litter Box

There are some truly jerky reasons for peeing outside the litter box. Your cat may feel better smelling more of its urine, or maybe they don’t like the litter (kind of like you pooping on the floor because you don’t like the toilet paper). Alternatively, if you have more than one cat, maybe the one who doesn’t pee on the floor is the real asshole for aggressively hoarding the tray. But even these reasons have excuses. If your cat needs to smell more of its urine, for example, it’s probably a sign of anxiety. And if they don’t like the litter, maybe it just hurts their paws.

There could also be other, more serious explanations. These include urinary tract infections, kidney or thyroid diseases, diabetes, digestive problems, and age-related health problems. 

Or maybe you’re the jerk for not emptying the box enough?

7. Meowing Through the Night

If your cat’s meowing more than usual, it may be a sign of disease. But, in general, it’s their way of getting what they want—from you. Cats very rarely meow at each other. It’s another behavior reinforced by human responses, which we’re afraid means it’s your fault again. Say your cat meows and you feed it, for example; you’ve taught them that meowing gets food. Many of us condition our pets in this way without really giving it thought. 

Cats may even learn to associate different meows—different lengths, different pitches—with different rewards (food, attention, etc.). It’s no coincidence that cats of deaf owners tend to meow less, and that studies suggest mimicry between meowing and the sound of human babies. 

Still, as mentioned, meowing may be a cause for concern. A good way to rule out underlying disease is to look at your cat’s ears and eyes. If their ears are turned sideways or back and/or the pupils are dilated, there’s a good chance your cat is sick or anxious about something.

6. Ignoring You

Why does your cat seem content to ignore you? Unlike dogs, who come running when they’re called, cats don’t even look up. We know they can hear us; studies have shown they can recognize your voice and even their names (at least as precursors to rewards). 

One eight-month study, for example, found that up to 70 percent of the cats involved turned their heads when they heard their human’s voice. It’s just that cat responses are extremely subtle, especially compared to dogs, whose responses are intentionally communicative. 

Basically, we haven’t bred or trained cats in the same way as dogs, which means cat behavior is far more instinctive. Cats in the wild don’t communicate vocally even with their own kittens unless there’s an imminent threat. So unless your cat wants something from you at the moment you happen to call them, they just have no reason to respond.

5. Headbutting You

Also known as bunting or head rubbing, headbutting is when your cat nuzzles their head against you. They also do it to each other. But it can become a nuisance if it gets more aggressive.

Unsurprisingly, dominant cats tend to headbutt more frequently. And this is a clue to the reason. Cats have scent-producing glands all over their bodies—including the chin, mouth, temples, and ears—and the dominant cat in a household of many will headbutt more to spread its scent (the scent of the colony) to all members. 

So, a-holey or not, when your cat headbutts you, they’re marking you out as their tribe—which, by the way, makes them your chief (at least to other cats).

4. Losing Their S*** On Catnip

Cats on catnip are like humans on coke: manic, aggressive, unpredictable, and stupid-looking. It’s just that in cats it’s not quite as hedonistic—or in any case they have an excuse.

As it turns out, there are chemicals in catnip, as well as in silver vine (another plant that causes the reaction), called nepetalactone and nepetalactol that act as mosquito repellants. In a study, researchers allowed cats to rub themselves on paper soaked in nepetalactol, then introduced mosquitos and counted how many cats were attacked. They found a clear correlation between rubbing and getting fewer bites.

It’s thought the drug effect—euphoria attributed to the ?-opioid system—is a response cats evolved to the plant to encourage them to engage with it. It’s not all cats, either; the trait is hereditary. 30 percent don’t respond to catnip and 20 percent don’t respond to silver vine. Tigers have also been found to be indifferent to catnip and even “disapproving” of silver vine.

3. Pushing Their Claws Into You

Kneading soft objects (as though making dough with their paws) is something all cats learn as kittens. It’s a way to stimulate their mother’s milk production by releasing oxytocin. It’s also a form of communication between kittens and their mother, as kneading releases pheromones from scent glands in the paws.

However, it’s common for domesticated cats to continue to knead into adulthood. This is where it gets painful, as many cats will also dig in their claws. In typical cat fashion, this just means they love you. And the more they do, the harder they’ll knead—so you become the a-hole if you punish.

But why do cats continue to knead long after mom is dead and buried? Again, it’s your fault. The retention of juvenile behaviors into adulthood (neoteny) in this case probably comes down to its advantage in socializing with you and other animals in the house.

2. Bringing Dead Animals Into the House

Even if you’re not disgusted, horrified, or guilt-ridden by your cat’s habit of bringing dead birds and rodents into the house, it can still feel like a passive aggressive comment on how much you feed them. The truth is, though, cats are simply born predators. It’s not a question of having to eat, it’s a matter of having to hunt. In fact, it’s the same drive that has your cat chasing laser pointers or feathers on a string. 

But why, once they’ve killed their prey, are they so eager to show it off to you? Sometimes they won’t even just leave it somewhere for you to find but will hold it in their mouth mewing until you come and see. This is down to another drive, which is their instinctive pack animal nature. Female cats in particular are primed to teach their young how to hunt. In other words, they’re not trying to scare you, shame you, or make you throw up; they’re just treating you like a helpless kitten that can’t hunt for itself—but one that they love very much.

1. Playing With Their Prey

Perhaps the most a-holey thing your cat does by far is to play with its prey before killing it. Typically, they’ll bat at the victim with their paws, ensuring a slow and torturous death and leaving us to wonder: How could Mister Cuddles be so cruel?

According to a study in the 1970s, the answer is actually quite simple. Researchers found that cats given rats and mice to prey on played with their victims longer the larger they were. And of course the larger the prey, the more risk for the predator. Researchers therefore concluded that “playing” was actually a strategy to disable from a distance before going in for the kill. Researchers also observed that hungrier cats played with their prey for shorter periods of time. We see the same behavior among big cats in the wild.

But why do cats sometimes not bother killing their played-with prey? The answer here is a little more a-holey: practice.