William Tecumseh Sherman once said that “War is Hell”. It certainly can be. But, in a broader sense, it can also be weird and wonderful, unexpectedly hilarious and quite touching. It isn’t all bombs and Rambo, it isn’t all Schindler’s List. This is not to minimise the horror inherent within mass conflict, rather it is to underline the more human and humane aspects, to highlight that, at the end of it all, each soldier is also a human being – good, bad or indifferent… and sometimes on a bike.

Here is a list of the more wacky, strange and unexpected things from the world’s militaries. Enjoy.

Related: 10 Alleged Secret Weapons Of The US Military

10 The Bolivian Navy

Bolivia has a navy, and a decent one, at that. They have a good number of patrol vessels, 3 hospital ships and thousands of well-trained personnel. There is one issue—they don’t have a coastline.

It all started back in the late nineteenth century when Chile defeated a joint Bolivian-Peruvian coalition in the ‘War of the Pacific’. The victory extended Chile’s territory northwards up the South American coastline, cutting off Bolivia’s access to the ocean. When your nation is named after one of the world’s greatest military leaders, it shouldn’t be any surprise that your nation’s institutions should display a supreme level of pluck and stubbornness – and don’t you dare tell them otherwise.

Although they have adapted to turn their naval force into a ‘Lake and River’ force in lieu of access to the sea, neighbouring Peru granted access to Bolivia to the coast back in 2010, albeit on a limited basis.

9 ‘Ji-had’ Joe

In the early 2000s, the CIA developed a doll with former Hasbro exec Donald Levine, famous for inventing another American icon – GI Joe.

It was an Osama Bin Landen action figure with a heat-sensitive plastic ‘skin’ covering the face. When it peeled off, his real face would be revealed – a monstrous, inhuman face with cat-like eyes that looks like a cross between the demon from the first ‘Insidious’ movie and Darth Maul. It was designed to make young people who lived within Al Qaeda’s sphere of influence fearful and disgusted by the man and his band of barbaric terrorists (as though their actions weren’t enough).

It is rumoured that 600 or so of the figures were shipped to and distributed in Pakistan, but only three figures confirmed to have existed.

In 2014, a prototype said to be from the estate of the late Donald Levine was put up for auction and sold to an anonymous bidder for $12,000.

8 Weirdest War Monument

The ‘Portuguese Fireplace’ is, well, a fireplace.

It stands alone in a clearing in England’s New Forest, a really weird sight considering it’s not inside a house. It stands to commemorate the Portuguese soldiers who, aided by the Canadian Timber Corps, filled the labour gap in the timber industry in the area due to the conscription of local workforce. The fireplace was part of the cookhouse which serviced the soldiers.

This quirky commemorative structure serves to remind all who see it that war is more than battles, dogfights, and submarines—Hard work to plug gaps on the home front can be as powerful a weapon as a Vickers machine gun or a slam-fired Winchester 1897.

7 CONOP 8888

Zombies were everywhere for a while. Not literally, but in pop culture. Every graphic novel, carton series, new TV drama and film seemed to want to jump on the slowly chugging Z-train. Sometimes, people take these fads too far, fully absorbed into the fandom, believing that these fictions are real. In 2011, the US Defence Department succumbed to this.

CONOP 8888 was a document drafted as a guide for the US military to combat the undead. But is it really that crazy? The project was designed to obfuscate any chance that the public would believe the plan were ‘real’ should it get leaked. What does this mean? Imagine the defence scenario was a ‘ground operation in Belgium’ or ‘how to gain air superiority in Crimea’ or ‘invasion and reigime change in Mexico’. Even if it was clear that this was just a scenario designed as an exercise, you know the press would have a field day. So, they formulated a totally unbelievable, fictional scenario.

The document covers many aspects of combatting zombie hordes, ending with how to “aid civil authorities in maintaining law and order and restoring basic services during and after a zombie attack.” And then it turned out to be vampires… what a waste of time.

6 The Most Dangerous Biker Gangs Ever

What could be more terrifying to your nation’s enemies than coming upon a platoon of well-armed, well-trained… bicyclists.

Many nations have traditionally had an active unit of bicycle-riding soldiers in their armed forces. Although these specialist units have dwindled over the years, no longer active in many countries they used to be an integral part of many countries’ fighting forces.

Contrary to what may seem like basic common sense (why didn’t opposing armies just reintroduce jousting polls to knock them off?), a lot of militaries used to use bicycle units – Cheap to run and maintain, these units were also able to access hard-to-reach areas twice as quickly as marching units. Quiet and ensuring the recruitment of physically fit soldiers, bicycle-riding soldiers were also perfect scouting units, used well into the 1940s.

Later on, the Viet Cong used bicycles to ferry supplies along the Ho Chi Minh Trail and the Tamil Tigers made great use of bikes during the Sri Lankan Civil War.

The Swiss Army maintained their bicycle corps until the early 2000s. the unit had been integral in defending Swiss neutrality during WWII, patrolling the borders in order to deter Nazi invasion. Right up until the end they trained in combat – recruits would have to complete a gruelling 200 km ride through the mountainous countryside, carrying kit that weighed at least 25 kilos.

You may be thinking that an ‘army bicycle’ is a stupid idea. Remember, though, that this is a ‘Swiss Army Bicycle’…it also contains a fighter jet, a tank and, of course, an awl.

5 The British Empire vs The Central Powers vs Mother Nature’s Minions

The First World War was more than just trench warfare in some Belgian fields. It truly was a World War.

Some of the most brutal fighting took place in East Africa, in what is today Tanzania and Kenya. The Battle of Tanga was one such bloody battle. Today, it is mainly remembered for the strange enemy that appeared on the battlefield, attack Germans and British alike.

Swarms of angry bees.

Opposing sides met on palm-oil and coconut plantations in the northern port city of Tanga, engaging in skirmishes. The heavy ordinance raining down across the fields agitated the bee population who were quietly making honey in their hives. The bees attacked scores of soldiers, sending many fleeing from the battlefield.

4 Forgotten Wars

Forgetting where you put your car keys and forgetting that you are at war with another nation are qualitatively different. This has not stopped many conflicts slipping the collective minds of whole nations.

In 2006, Japan finally capitulated to the demands for recognition from Montenegro, ending their brutal, bloody war. No? don’t remember this one? Neither did Japan and Montenegro. Back in the Russo-Japanese War from 1904-05, Montenegro decided to (symbolically) back Russia against Japan. When the war ended with the signing of a peace treaty, Montenegro wasn’t mentioned, thus resulting in the small Balkan state remaining in a state of war with Japan. 100-years passed, and Montenegro decided to split from Serbia towards the end of the Balkan crisis. Japan promptly recognised the nation’s independence, thus ending the war.

Even weirder is the ongoing struggle between Russia and the small town of Berwick-upon-Tweed. Due to its position as the northernmost town in England, right on the border with Scotland, whether Berwick-upon-Tweed is part of England or Scotland has been a dispute for centuries. As a result, it was customary for documents such as treaties to be signed ‘King/Queen of England, Scotland/Great Britain, Ireland, Berwick-upon-Tweed and all the British Dominions’. The Treaty of Paris ended the Crimean War, but Berwick-upon-Tweed wasn’t mentioned. So, for the last 150-years or so, the town of Berwick-upon-Tweed has been in a state of war with Imperial Russia. A country that no longer exists. Sort of. Not really.

In 1651, in order to recoup some losses suffered by supporting the losing Royalist faction in England’s civil war, Dutch Admiral Marteen Tromp tried to extract reparations from the Isles of Scilly, a small chain of islands between southern England and France. Tromp declared war on the isles. When the opposing side in the conflict, the Parliamentarians under Oliver Cromwell, took control of the war, they quickly took control of the isles and the Dutch sailed home. They never rescinded their declaration of war. It took until 1986 for this loophole to be noticed after a local historian uncovered the fact that a peace treaty had never been drafted and, after a 335-year war, the Scilly Isles finally had peace with the Dutch. Nobody cared.

3 Battlefield Blunders And A King’s Last Straw

England and Scotland, the ‘auld enemy’ and, um, “those hairy men in skirts.” These two nations have had their fair share of bust-ups. One of the most inglorious conflicts (for the Scots – don’t worry, guys, just remember Bannockburn) was the time James V of Scotland threw a massive hissy fit and sent his forces down to invade England.

Henry VIII had just legalised every last thing he wanted to do that was previously illegal, even making his own special church. When his nephew, the King of Scotland, turned down his “offer” to follow suit, maintaining the primacy of the Catholic Church in Scotland, Henry sent up some troops to rough up those insolent celts. James didn’t enjoy this, sending his own force across the border.

Bad move.

The large Scottish army of around 15,000 men found themselves quickly corralled into an are between the River Esk and a large peat bog called ‘Solway Moss’. The much smaller English defensive force essentially watched them, only harassing their fringes, causing hundreds of the panicking Scots to drown in the bog or the river. They took over a thousand prisoners as the remaining Scots fled back home.

James, who was busy suffering with a fever and being thoroughly disappointed that his wife had just given birth to a girl, took the news of his loss at Solway Moss quite poorly – he died.

2 Sulu Warrior

There are a lot of awesome things about Fiji – tropical beaches, amazing rugby players and an amazing, multicultural heritage. One thing that is slightly less awesome but very comical is the sight of the Palace Guards wearing the traditional sulu skirts as part of their dress uniform.

The skirt was a cultural import from neighbouring Tonga in the nineteenth century, adopted by Fijians as a sign of their conversion to Christianity (so don’t cry ‘cultural insensitivity’ – it’s a new-ish, Tongan import. *Author’s note* Check out our Welsh national dress, you have my permission to mock us freely, as I do).

It is now part of the national dress, worn proudly by the men and women entrusted with guarding the royal palace The only problem is that once you think “it looks a bit like the bottom of Wilma Flintstone’s dress”, you cannot unsee that mental image.

1 Alternate History IRL

Films, video games and novels that deal with ‘what if the Nazis won’ have been popular for a while – it’s fun to read ‘The Man in the High Castle’ and imagine what you’d do if the Nazis occupied New York… no, not fun… terrifying, I meant terrifying.

In 1942, the city of Winnipeg in Canada got a taste of such an alternate reality in real life.

The ominously named “If Day” occurred on the 19th of February, complete with fake stormtroopers hassling citizens at checkpoints, ‘blown up’ bridges (set-dressed with rubble to render them impassable), a mock aerial blitzkrieg bombing and even fake reichsmarks being issued throughout the city. The reason for the day was printed on the reverse of the banknotes:

“Bonds or bondage, the choice is yours!”

Yes, this was a push to sell victory bonds to aid in the Allied war effort. And it worked – Winnipeg smashed their expected target in Bond sales. Eventually, the Allies smashed the Nazi regime in turn.

What’s the first thing that comes to mind when you see a truck full of the military? War? Trouble? Are things about to get ugly?

Why is this? It’s partly because any time these people in uniform show up with their foreboding demeanor and guns raised, the aftermath is never pretty. While that might be the case, what do you expect? After all, the military is tasked with defending the nation’s interests and policies, sometimes involving war.

But the military does more than that. They often do a lot of good that goes unnoticed. So we’re going to shed light on some of the best things the military has done.

10 Building Makeshift Hospitals for Patients

The coronavirus pandemic and the thousands of people who needed hospitalization, care, and medication are still fresh on our minds.

With our hospitals brimming with new admissions daily, it wasn’t long before they were overwhelmed. The military stepped in by sending its Army Corps of Engineers to convert large open spaces such as hotels, dormitories, and convention centers into temporary medical facilities.

Military medical teams were also deployed to civilian hospitals to ease pressure on the existing medical staff. The military medical team didn’t stop at COVID-19 patients; they helped in the ER, performed surgeries, and attended to car crash victims like normal doctors.

9 Putting Out Forest Fires

Lightning strikes, the sun’s heat, unattended campfires, and careless smokers are just a few of the many things that can potentially start a forest fire.

While it might seem counterintuitive, some wildland fire managers might let the fire run its course, which benefits the ecosystem. It’s not like they’ll turn a blind eye. They’ll often create barriers and boundaries to prevent it from leaving a certain zone. However, an uncontrolled forest fire can devastate not just local wildlife and towns but entire ecosystems and communities.

There are several occasions when the U.S. military has been called upon to help suppress wildfires. These brave soldiers provide incident assessment and aerial support (dropping fire retardants and water), serve as firefighters on the ground, and transport injured firefighters away from the scene.

When the 2021 Dixie Fire in California’s Plumas National Forest finally crossed the two-month mark, the U.S. Army trooped in with chainsaws, Pulaski hand tools, and other equipment to extinguish hot spots. Our guardsmen were also instrumental in containing the Bootleg fire in Beatty, Oregon, and the Lick Creek fire that ravaged Washington state.

8 Evacuating Flood Victims

Heavy rainfall and hurricanes can result in major flood waters storming into homes and destroying everything in their path. During times like these, the military participates in evacuating displaced people.

Some of the life-saving evacuation missions they conduct include swift water rescue for people trapped in rapid flood waters, hoist and rescue operations, and using tactical military vehicles to move through high waters searching for survivors. The military can also assist large-scale evacuation plans to get as many people out of harm’s way as possible.

When heavy rainfall turned into severe flash flooding in Eastern Kentucky earlier this year, the National Guard deployed Black Hawk helicopters to rescue and evacuate the victims.

Further afield, the U.S. military also joins international efforts in flood-ravaged countries to provide relief and conduct search and rescue operations.

7 Clearing Debris After Natural Disasters Occur

Tornadoes, earthquakes, and hurricanes leave literal tons of wreckage that needs clearing out for people to return to their homes and cities to start the long recovery processes.

In these scenarios, the military will often deploy teams that use chainsaws and skid loaders, among other tools, to cut away trees and move rubble, wreckage, and other trash from the affected neighborhoods. Their efforts aren’t just limited to land debris. The Army has helped clean up debris from water bodies (like Lake Martin, AL) and their shorelines to ensure the waterways are free of potential hazards.

Plus, the troops can set up security perimeters to keep people out of certain areas if the local authorities suspect toxic waste and hazardous materials have been released into the atmosphere.

In 2015, as Hurricane Joaquin moved north and the potential of flooding loomed overhead, the New York National Guard took a proactive approach to clear debris off the Normans Kill Esopus Creeks to make room for more water. This preventative measure saw them remove trees and other debris that could knock out bridges, impact homes, and destroy roads as water levels increased.

6 Providing Food and Humanitarian Relief

Whenever natural disasters or wars break out, people are so concerned with avoiding the danger that they often don’t know where their next meal is coming from. Something so basic to human needs that we often don’t think about it. Without food security, the people’s economic and social stability can quickly crumble, leading to rampant violence and theft.

Our military forces demonstrate their concern and desire to help people by providing food, water, blankets, and other emergency supplies. At home, the guardsmen have offered this crucial support to communities devastated by hurricanes, tropical storms, and tornadoes.

When Hurricane Sandy wreaked havoc in Queens and Staten Island, Marines brought much-needed supplies, food, and water. The military was also on hand to support USAID in transporting relief supplies to St. Martin and Dominica islands affected by hurricanes Irma and Maria.

On a national scale, the U.S. military personnel have also supported the Philippine, Nepalese, Japanese, Haitian, and African nations with food and other humanitarian essentials as they dealt with disastrous typhoons, earthquakes, and floods.

5 Keeping the Pirates Out

The Wellerman song, a sea shanty that has recently gone viral, conjures romantic ideas of being at sea, sailing distant lands, and sipping on sugared tea and rum. This story we tell ourselves isn’t reality, unfortunately. Being at sea in real life and traveling to distant lands may involve dealing with unruly waters and, worse, pirates.

Since the mid-2000s, some of the busiest shipping lanes within the Indian Ocean, the Red Sea, and the Gulf of Aden have been ravaged by Somali pirates. These pirates waylaid oil tankers and cargo ships and kidnapped those onboard demanding ransoms.

The U.S. Navy, in collaboration with countries like Canada, the UK, France, Germany, Australia, Saudi Arabia, Pakistan, and Spain, among others, formed an anti-piracy coalition to patrol these waters and rescue hijacked ships. In 2009, our heroic Seals shot three pirates who at the time were holding Captain Richard Phillips hostage, while the fourth pirate surrendered. Hollywood even made a movie about it and named it after the brave captain: Captain Phillips.

With the multinational naval task force monitoring, inspecting, and stopping suspect shipping, piracy incidents have dramatically dropped, much to global shipping companies’ relief. They were losing billions of dollars to these pirates, after all.

4 Intercepting Illegal Drugs

President Richard Nixon declared war on drugs in the 1970s, and decades later, we still fight the same battle.

Most of the illegal drugs that come into the United States come from South America. Drug smugglers created a seven-million-square-mile Transit Zone that includes the Mexican Gulf, the Caribbean Sea, and the Eastern Pacific Ocean to avoid capture.

Looking at the costs involved and the level of difficulty in tracking and disrupting trafficking networks, it’s been quite a tall order for U.S. law enforcement and partner nations to stop drug trafficking. The U.S. Coast Guard provides a helping hand by monitoring aerial and maritime activities over this area to ensure they intercept drugs in bulk before they reach the United States, where drug lords break them down into smaller packages for easier movement.

In February 2022, the Coast Guard seized 30 metric tons of marijuana and cocaine and offloaded the haul at Fort Lauderdale, Florida. This, coupled with several other successful interceptions, helps keep America safer and healthier.

3 Search and Rescue Operations

We love tension-filled, action-packed movies, right? A civilian or service member is stuck in a diplomatically sensitive nation facing death threats, and a team is sent from home to rescue them. No, I’m not talking about Ben Affleck’s Argo, more like Rules of Engagement with Samuel L Jackson and Tommy Lee Jones (such a cool duo) or Tears of the Sun starring Bruce Willis and Monica Bellucci.

In a world far from fiction, covert missions are as dangerous as they come. They require service members to make quick decisions, stay calm in stressful situations, and even risk injury to save others. These experts use specialized equipment to locate distressed civilians or personnel, deliver them to safety, and even administer medical assistance when needed.

In 2009, a U.S. Army unit in Afghanistan’s Helmand Province found itself trapped under immense fire from Taliban Forces. The QRF team attempting to relieve the unit soon found themselves pinned down while Apache attack helicopters took heavy machine gun fire from different directions. B-1 bombers couldn’t help much since no one could tell which of the Taliban compounds housed the enemy, and they dared not risk civilian casualties or hurting their fellow service members.

The unit called the Combat Search and Rescue team for help. The rescue team flew their Blackhawks at a low altitude to confirm the enemy’s exact location, then turned back and focused their artillery on that one compound.

But not all search and rescue missions involve entering enemy lines to rescue wounded or captured Americans. Covert missions are also part of the deal. Our soldiers are deployed following natural disasters on land or to help boaters in distress at sea.

2 Cleaning Oil Spills

Marine and environment lovers, we have something for you. From failed drilling operations to broken pipelines, gallons of oil spill into American waters yearly. That’s not the good news; it’s what the military does to help.

An oil spill can devastate the ocean’s ecosystem, not to mention it can ruin your day at the beach. Oil spills hamper many sea animals’ ability to insulate, increasing their chances of dying from hypothermia. Oil toxicity can kill plant life, cause health problems among sea creatures, and make seafood unsafe to eat.

The Coast Guard partners with NOAA experts to protect people and the environment from the effects of oil spills. They can choose to clean the oil from the water’s surface before it reaches the coastline or conduct in situ burning where it is burned off the sea surface. A third alternative would be to release chemical dispersants into the water to break down the oil into smaller droplets that microbes can eat.

In 2010, when the Deepwater Horizon drilling rig exploded and released copious amounts of crude oil into the Gulf of Mexico, the U.S. Coast Guard led clean-up activities. They employed all three methods to rid the sea of oil.

1 Guarding American Embassies Overseas

Our overseas embassies and consulates are responsible for maintaining friendly relations with host countries, representing our interests, and overseeing the rights of American nationals residing or traveling within the host countries.

The people working in these embassies have families and loved ones back home, so who watches over them and protects them if they’re attacked? Who ensures the safety of classified material for our national security?

The marines, of course.

In 2021, the Marines bravely held fort at the Kabul airport even as they dealt with chaotic groups of people and a suicide bombing. A bombing that claimed the lives of some of their own. These brave soldiers went on to airlift 124,000 people, including U.S. citizens and Afghans, from Afghanistan. Again, this is just one of many operations when our service members have put themselves in harm’s way for our sake.