Hey—are you gonna finish… whatever that is?

Fast food misfires come in many forms. Mindless mashups, ill-conceived holiday homages and irreconcilable departures from a restaurant’s primary offerings are just a few of the ways fast food chains around the world have embarrassed themselves and disgusted their customers.

Here are ten of the most ridiculous culinary concoctions in fast food history. Bon appetit.

10 Bizarre Foreign Versions Of American Fast Food

10 The Double Down Sandwich (KFC)

This winter, mired in the third wave of the COVID-19 pandemic, the people of Italy received a true treat from the US military: assistance with vaccine procurement and distribution.

Actually wait – scratch that. The American soldier was Colonel Sanders, and the gift was a triple bypass to top off that deadly respiratory disease. On February 15, 2021, the Double Down Sandwich returned to KFCs across Italy, giving our parmesan-eating brethren a taste of the American heart(attack)land.

What’s the Double Down, you ask? Well it’s pretty simple: take two fast food favorites – bacon and cheese – add something suspiciously called the “Colonel’s Sauce,” and put it all between… two gigantic slabs of Original Recipe fried chicken.

The Double Down pretty much exemplifies America’s willingness to take pride in gluttony. It caters to the growing (and growing, and growing) set of US consumers who gleefully shun sound medical advice in the name of freedom. Hell, the very name suggests that its ingestion is a gamble.

Incredibly, the Double Down is only 540 calories – about as much as a McDonald’s Big Mac. However, the devil (and the diabetes) lies in the details: 145 milligrams of cholesterol (more than twice the Big Mac), 1,380 milligrams of sodium (over half the recommended limit) and 32 grams of fat (half the day’s allowance). Per metrics site FiveThirtyEight, the result is one of the unhealthiest sandwiches ever.

9 Buffalo Latte (Tim Horton’s)

Throughout the 2010s, beloved Canadian coffee & donut chain Tom Horton’s had its sights set on expansion in the U.S. Americans familiar with the chain – generally considered higher quality than Dunkin’ but less expensive than Starbucks – welcomed Timmy H’s with open arms and wallets, and today there are over 500 locations across the US.

But in October 2017, Tim Horton’s forced a square idea into a round donut hole. To celebrate openings across Buffalo, NY – the birthplace of buffalo sauce – the company introduced an absolutely repulsive buffalo-flavored latte.

Two hypotheses exist concerning this limited-time menu monstrosity. The first posits it was simply a bad idea; that a coffeehouse which also offers a variety of breakfast sandwiches could have honored Buffalo with a buffalo-flavored sausage, egg & cheese biscuit (or, at the very least, something that wasn’t milky… definitely a gross-out line crosser).

The other theory is that Tim Horton’s never intended to sell a single cringe-inducing cup of the Buffalo Latte, but instead was engaging in a publicity stunt. While making potential customers gag isn’t typically recommended, there’s a bit of buffalo-flavored brilliance to that.

8 Kit Kat Chocoladilla (Taco Bell)

Let’s be honest: an entire list could be dedicated just to Taco Bell items. In fact, one already is.

Not surprisingly from the marketing geniuses who decided the “Fourth Meal” should be a thing, there’s a lot to digest (or indigest) here. Potential candidates for Taco Bell’s top spot include the why-is-a-taco-joint-doing-this triangular chicken chips with nacho dipping sauce, the idiotically named Beefy Potato-rito, and the entirely appropriately-named Forbidden Burrito.

But Taco Bell saved its best dietary disaster for last. Its Kit Kat Chocoladilla boldly asks the question “why not top off your fourth meal with a chocolate sandwich?” Basically, picture a large soft tortilla slathered with Nutella-esque chocolate sauce, interspersed with chocolate chips and chunks of Kit Kat bars. If you believe the officially stated calorie count of 329, I have a chocolate-covered, tortilla-wrapped bridge in Brooklyn to sell you.

Men’s Health magazine took a matter-of-fact perspective toward the Kit Kat Chocoladilla, deeming it in line with Taco Bell’s penchant for TexMex-bastardized trial and error: “it’s about time they smashed a candy bar and chocolate chips between two halves of a flour tortilla. That whole fried-chicken-as-a-taco-shell thing,” the review continues, referencing another culinary experiment, “was just a little too bland for our drunken food cravings.”

7 The Meatatarian Burger (Burger King)

This entry is ridiculous, alright: ridiculously awesome. One would imagine this meaty masterpiece resulted from enough people asking themselves: “Aren’t we sick of all this vegetarian bullshit?”… then deciding that question need not be rhetorical.

Voila! In 2016, Burger King introduced its Meatatarian Range in New Zealand. The three-burger series consisted of the sumptuously suggestive Full Meaty, the could-go-either-way Half Meaty, and the goes-with-anything Bacon Meaty. As in other walks of life, the Full Meaty stood out the most: two beef patties, a chicken patty, six bacon strips, two slices of cheese, barbecue sauce and onions. The Half Meaty removes one of the beef patties, while the Bacon Meaty replaces both beef patties with an extra layer of chicken.

True to its stature as a backlash to vegetarianism and healthy food in general, the Meatatarian Range’s calorie count was… well, impossible to find. By listing it as a “limited time only” item, BK avoided mandatory nutritional transparency guidelines.

However, in 2005 Burger King introduced the uncreatively named Enormous Omelet Sandwich, featuring a two-egg omelet topped with two slices of American cheese, three strips of bacon, and a sausage patty on a hoagie-style bun. That work of artery-clogging art came in at 730 calories and 47 grams of fat, so it can be safety assumed that the Full Meaty eclipsed that by several inche… um, calories.

6 The Greek Mac (McDonald’s)

Per the McDonald’s website, the Greek Mac is: “A Greek classic! Two juicy beef patty’s with lemon sauce, onions, lettuce, sliced tomato’s wrapped together in a pita bread, with tzatziki [yogurt] sauce.”

Setting aside that a multi-billion-dollar international corporation can afford a copywriter who knows the plural of “patty” is “patties,” and the plural of “tomato” is “tomatoes,” the oddest thing about this entry is that the Big Greek is only available in Greece and neighboring Cyprus. Which is akin to a burger joint limiting a new pizza item to Italy.

With an internationally accepted ethnic food (like a gyro) limiting availability to the places with the BEST gyros (like Greece and Cyprus) makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. People will accept a meh McDonald’s gyro far more readily in Athens, Georgia than Athens, Greece.

Even non-Greek reviewers noticed. Per UK-based BurgerLad: “The tzatziki just wasn’t to scratch compared to what I’ve been eating throughout the rest of my holiday – it was missing the lemon, the garlic and more cucumber, along with the richness from olive oil.”

It then addresses the item’s misguided target market: “I would be more than happy if the UK had this instead of the Big Tasty,” referencing a UK-centric item.

5 Most American Thickburger (Carl’s Jr./Hardee’s)

Because ‘Murica, that’s why. From the country that brought you cancel culture, rampant gun violence and an impressive 42% obesity rate comes the most patriotic patties ever placed between two buns.

In 2015, sister chains Carl’s Jr. and Hardee’s launched the Most American Thickburger, a salute to classic, clog-inducing American cuisine. The greasy cheeseburger was sandwiched between a hot dog and a layer of Lays potato chips, along with pickles, lettuce, tomato, ketchup, and mustard. As another nice touch, it actually sort of looked like the average American.

Like a Western movie hero daring the bad guy to make his move, the Most American Thickburger dared its largely under-exercised and under-insured audience to pledge alliance to flame-broiled flavor. The half-pound version clocked in at 1,190 calories, 29 grams of saturated fat, and a whopping 3,170 milligrams of sodium.

Apparently the Most American Thickburger wasn’t just heavy but top heavy. A review on BrandEating.com complained that “the chips and pickles were situated on the very bottom and formed an uneven base for the lettuce and tomatoes (wet ingredients that slid to and fro atop the chips). On top of this Jenga-like Slip & Slide were the heavier beef patty and split hot dog.” Ultimately, its advice to consumers was to “eat this burger upside down and hope for the best.”

4 Chizza (KFC)

Replacing something typically bread-based with something other than bread? Sounds like a job for KFC (see items #10 and #1 on this list).

Generously described by The Independent as a “low-calorie, high-protein” pizza, the Chizza is among the most creatively named, albeit least appetizing, of KFC’s bread-substituting bonanzas. It’s pretty much exactly what it sounds like: fried chicken covered with mozzarella cheese and tomato sauce, shaped (sort of) like a pizza. It’s basically a chicken parmesan if Italian cuisine was misguidedly entrusted to a cracker from Kentucky.

No bread? No problem for those sprinting toward a diabetic death. The Chizza contains nearly 700 calories and 38 grams of fat. And that’s before customers top if off with their choice of ham, pineapple or extra sauce. The Colonel likes Hawaiian pizza – who knew?

The simplistic recipe sent people with way too much time on their hands into a fervor, with Tweets including “The KFC Chizza is literally a piece of chicken meat & toppings DONT [sic] BE FOOLED.” The Chizza was initially introduced as a “limited time only” option at KFC locations in Singapore. It then expanded to India and finally Saudi Arabia, where it enjoyed more rights than women.

3 Mush ‘N Cheese, Berry Burger and Angry Whopper (Burger King)

This combo entry’s main point: Burger King is officially out of ideas.

In late 2014, Burger King Japan made two highly suspect decisions. First, it decided that “Berry Kristmush” was an acceptable marketing campaign slogan. Second, it decided that the lure of said promotion would be two of the oddest offerings in burger history.

First, the Berry Burger. It’s a hamburger that, per Eater, has “mixed berry sauce and what appears to be five carefully placed blueberries. Nothing screams “happy holidays” like warm, beefy fruit.” Indeed.

The Berry Burger’s Christmastime compadre was the Mush ‘N Cheese Burger, which is a cheeseburger with mushrooms on it. Otherwise known as a cheeseburger with a fairly common topping, renamed something completely revolting. Nice job guys.

Need another way to mask the inferior-even-for-fast-food flavor of your burgers? I know – hot sauce! Meet Burger King’s Angriest Whopper. Billed as a spicy spin on the BK classic, the burger featured jalapeno peppers, red buns with hot sauce baked into them, and the sexual-assault-sounding spicy angry sauce.

Unfortunately, Burger King couldn’t even do THAT right: Per FastFoodMenuPrices.com: “The word ‘angry’ is meant to give the impression of a spicy hot burger that will rile your taste buds … but the Angry sauce is more zesty… and the jalapeños are canned slices….Both left A LOT of spice to be desired.”

2 Doritos Crunchy Crust Pizza (Pizza Hut)

One of the ever-decreasing reasons I’m proud to be an American is that this culinary clusterf*ck was an Aussie thing.

On the heels of Taco Bell’s well-received Doritos Locos Taco – a taco whose tortilla shell is made from snack food’s signature cheesy corn chip – Pizza Hut Australia decided “why not us?” Despite several satisfying answers to that seemingly rhetorical question coming immediately to mind (for starters, “Because mozzarella and nacho cheeses don’t go together, EVER”), in 2014 the Doritos Crunchy Crust Pizza debuted in restaurants across the country.

An Italian-Mexican mashup proudly insulting both of these eclectic cuisines, the Doritos Crunchy Crust Pizza features a mozzarella cheese-stuffed crust layered with nacho cheese Doritos chips and cheddar cheese. The Doritos layer is far more than a few crumbs, but rather full chips atop one another for the experience of stuffing one’s face with both multiple Doritos AND the bread and cheese upon which they’re stacked.

“Why Doritos? Well it is a globally loved brand and they have the best corn chips to deliver the ultimate crunch,” Pizza Hut Australia Head of Marketing & Innovation (and possible forced-confession hostage) Fatima Syed said in a press release. “We know from research how big an impact the crunch sound has on one’s appetite,” she continued, in a sentence somehow more ridiculous than her first one.

1 Doughnut Fried Chicken Sandwich (KFC)

Between this, the Chizza and the Double Down, it’s apparent that KFC either a) really likes putting things between other things that aren’t bread, or b) simply ran out of bread.

Colonel Sanders has the unenviable distinction of being the only chap with three entries on this list. Impressively, this item earned a spot with just three ingredients: (1) donut, (2) chicken, and (3) second donut.

Introduced in 2019, KFC’s Doughnut Fried Chicken Sandwich solved the cumbersome need to use utensils while scarfing down 1,000 calories’ worth of chicken and waffles. Replace the waffles with donuts and the maple syrup with glazed sugar. Done, done and delicious.

And deadly. The Doughnut Fried Chicken Sandwich packs a whopping 1100 calories – more than half the recommended daily allowance. A heart-stopping 585 of those calories are from fat. Over 1,300 milligrams of sodium, 50 milligrams of cholesterol and a stunningly saccharine 40 grams of sugar – more than an adult male’s entire recommended daily intake – will keep cardiologists and insulin manufacturers well-employed and wealthy.

Top 10 Failed Fast Food Ideas

For better or worse, Americans tend to think of themselves as the biggest junk-food consumers in the world. While one glance down your average American main street makes it hard to argue against that idea, it turns out most of the world is just as dedicated to their mass-produced artery-cloggers as we are. And all of the big chains know it.

To cater to this giant, multicultural market, fast food chains have concocted all sorts of menu items meant to hybridize styles, pioneer tastes, and just plain pander to locals and their desire to try something new. Let’s explore ten of the weirdest menu items from American fast-food chains in other countries.

Related: 10 Weirdest Street Foods In The World

10The Nutella Burger

If you’re like most human beings, your immediate reaction to hearing the phrase ‘Nutella burger’ is to gag or maybe questions its existence. The thought of sweet chocolate hazelnut goo spread atop a savory beef patty is not most people’s favorite. Don’t worry, though, because McDonald’s Nutella burger is actually just Nutella spread between two buns, and it’s delicious.

The treat is called a “Sweety con Nutella,” or loving called, Sweety, and is available at McCafe’s in Italy, the birthplace of Nutella. Though not exactly a health nut’s dream, the snack has proven to be quite popular, just like Nutella itself. Since its launch in 2016, Sweety’s has been a steady fan-favorite. Unlike so many McDonald’s creations through the years, it is likely to stay on the menu for a long time.

9 Italian Cheese Bricks

Speaking of McDonald’s in Italy, their sides are just as foreign as their desserts. For many Americans, McDonald’s fries are their best feature. The chain manages to hit the right balance of crispiness and saltiness with their fries. Yummy. Yet, for many Italians, those perfect McDonald’s fries can’t compete with a brick of Parmesan cheese.

Known as the “Snack al Parmigiano,” the side is a standard substitute for fries in Italy if the customer opts for it. The cheese is pure Parmigiano Reggiano, and blends both tastiness and relative healthiness. Best of all? McDonald’s Italiano has affectionately dubbed it “The Pocket Cheese.”

8 The Chizza

Our first of many trips to the cosmopolitan food mecca that is Asia is to Singapore (and Saudi Arabia, of all places). There, Kentucky Fried Chicken has a menu item known only as the “Chizza.” As you can probably guess, the Chizza is a chicken pizza.

Completely inverting the pizza-topping paradigm in the states, the Chizza uses a wide, flat piece of fried chicken as its ‘crust’ and adds toppings from there, like mozzarella and marinara. While this could easily be viewed as just an odd cousin to chicken parmesan, the most common toppings on the Chizza are pineapple chunks and ham, making it more akin to a Hawaiian-Singaporean-Italian Frankenstein. And likely a delicious one.

7 The Inception of Pizzas

Staying in Singapore, the country continues its well-known reputation for extravagance at their Pizza Huts, wherein customers can order the “Double Sensation Pizza.” As its name suggests, the Double Sensation is a pizza inside a pizza. How this was not an American invention is anyone’s guess.

At the outermost edge, the Double Sensation Pizza has a stuffed crust with multiple kinds of cheese oozing out of holes on the sides. Continuing inward, the pie is topped like a typical supreme pizza, though halfway through the slices, it reveals its namesake. Each slice is cut in half by another crust, again stuffed, but this time with cheese and sausage. Then the pie continues inward with more supreme toppings until it reaches the center, where it is garnished with a red, stemmed cherry. With the topping in place, the Double Sensation Pizza is ready to be devoured like a delicious pizza sundae!

6 Pork and Seaweed Donuts

A quick flight north takes us to China, where Dunkin’ Donuts has a particularly strange donut offering. The dried pork and seaweed donuts are exactly as described; they’re topped with crumbles of dried seaweed and pork floss, probably the last two ingredients an American would expect on their donut.

The donut base itself is also different than what Americans may expect. The dried pork and seaweed donuts are yeast donuts being made with less sugar. That makes the whole snack a savory meal instead of a sugary dessert. Considering how we treated the potential combination of Nutella and beef, this all-savory donut, essentially just a circular bao, makes a lot of sense.

5 Pumpkin Spice Fries

Next, we land in Japan, where in 2016, McDonald’s concocted the “Halloween Choco Potato,” a tray of fries drizzled with chocolate and pumpkin sauces. The Halloween Choco Potato fries were released in October and were meant to honor the spooky season, both in taste and appearance. Surprisingly, the majority of reviews have been positive.

Customers loved the salty-sweet combo enough that the treat reappeared for multiple Halloweens. It’s no surprise that chocolate fries without the pumpkin sauce are a regular at McDonald’s Japan all year-round. Apparently, the secret is that the salt is toned down just enough to accent the sugar instead of combating it. Now, these are a treat I may need to try!

4 All-Black Burgers

Japanese fast food is also famous, or perhaps infamous, for the black-bun burgers available at their Burger Kings, named “Kuro Burgers.” Kuro literally means “black” in Japanese, and though not an imaginative title, it is an accurate one.

The buns are charred black and further blackened by the addition of squid ink. On top of that, the cheese slices are made with bamboo charcoal and also come out jet black. If that wasn’t enough, the sauce and beef patty are also blackened, leaving only the optional lettuce, tomato, and onion, the only ingredients not entirely Kuro. The trend caught on in the area, and soon McDonald’s Hong Kong introduced their own ink-black burgers and ‘competing’ all-white burgers.

3 The Kit-Kat Quesadilla

Across the globe, Taco Bell has put dozens of different spins on its quesadillas. Taco Bell South Korea has kimchi quesadillas. Taco Bell Philippines has Cheetos quesadillas. Taco Bell Finland apparently puts BBQ pork in everything, including their quesadilla. All of those sound delicious. But possibly the single weirdest is Taco Bell’s “Kit Kat Chocodilla,” which made its debut in the UK.

The decadent, delicious abomination is made by melting whole Kit Kat bars and chocolate chips between Taco Bell’s traditional flour tortillas. It’s hard to argue with the simple combination of chocolate and carbs, especially with some remnant of that signature Kit Kat crunch remaining. After trying one, no one would even consider an argument against the gooey treat. Taco Bell has recently made the Kit Kat Chocodilla stateside, starting exclusively in the Midwest. They have even branched out into new flavors like the equally-amazing “Twix Chocodilla.”

2 The Tabasco Sundae

Coming off an item we can tell you firsthand is delicious; we arrive at an item we hope no one ever has to encounter in any form. Stateside, McDonald’s sundaes come in three traditional flavors: chocolate, caramel, and strawberry; you can’t go wrong! However, McDonald’s Hong Kong decided in 2017 to try out a brand new variety: the “Tabasco Fudge Sundae.”

The Tabasco Fudge Sundae dessert was launched as part of a larger collaboration with Tabasco. It was meant to serve as a companion to a Tabasco-laden burger and similarly-spiced fries. The Tabasco Fudge Sundae ended up stealing the show among the spicy lineup, though, and it’s no wonder why. The Tabasco sauce is not added to the shake as a topping, like you might expect, but rather blended into the vanilla ice cream, making the entire affair unsettlingly spicy. 

1 The Windows 7 Whopper

You read that right. Topping off our list is the “Windows 7 Whopper” from Burger King Japan. When Microsoft launched an operating system in 2009, it collaborated with Burger Kings in Japan to sell special Whoppers with seven patties. The promotion only lasted one week in October, but its legacy has endured ever since.

Just looking at the Windows 7 Whopper burger, its structural flaws are apparent. The two decidedly average-sized buns were not meant to contain seven whole patties between them, in addition to any cheese, veggies, and condiments the customer desired. There are a few hilarious reviews of the sandwich worth reading, and almost all of them share a few central themes.

The Windows 7 Whopper burger was almost impossible to hold together. It was also almost impossible to bite into evenly. The combined juices from the seven patties inevitably soaked the buns until they were a soggy mess. Probably the worst part of all is that by default, the burger comes with no cheese and only enough veggies for the topmost patty. As a Gizmodo reviewer so eloquently put it: “How does it taste? How do you think it tastes? It’s seven pieces of Burger King meat…This is meat followed by meat, washed down by meat.”

British cuisine has received a lot of criticism and outright mockery over the years. Of course, it doesn’t help that some of the traditional dishes have absurd names like “Toad in the Hole” and “Spotted Dick.”

“One cannot trust people whose cuisine is so bad,” French President Jacques Chirac was overheard snarkily commenting to Vladimir Putin in 2005. “The only thing they have ever done for European agriculture is mad cow disease.” Ironically, less than a decade later, in the 2012 San Pellegrino World’s Best Restaurants awards, Britain had three eateries place in the top 15, one more than France.

Other misunderstandings regarding British cuisine are often purely linguistic… bangers are sausages, and so are toads. Crisps are chips, and chips are actually thick-cut fries. It also helps to know that puddings are sometimes savory, and even actual desserts seldom have the texture or flavor of what other nationalities expect a dessert to have. In England, you’ll quickly realize that a mincemeat pie does not actually contain any meat at all.

Here are ten items you can find on a British menu that might be challenging to the palette and sometimes to the eyes.

10 Bubble & Squeak

Bubble and squeak is a cute name for possibly one of the most unattractive but oh-so-tasty British dishes. It’s a sauteed concoction containing leftover vegetables, usually mashed potatoes, along with carrots, onions, cabbage, shredded leftover meat, and pretty much whatever else is on hand. Some folks add Brussel sprouts, but that’s a big no from me. It’s commonly served as part of a full English breakfast.

In Scotland, it’s called rumpledethumps, but ask for colcannon in Ireland. The name allegedly was derived from the noise that a wooden spoon makes when clattering about cooking the dish. So it’s probably not all that surprising that a dictionary published in 1785 defined bubble and squeak as “beef and cabbage fried together. It is so called from its bubbling up and squeaking while over the fire.”

Despite resembling a frisbee that’s been mangled by a lawnmower, British celebrity chef, Jamie Oliver, describes it as “one of our great British recipes.”^[1]

9 Scotch Egg

A Scotch egg is a hard-boiled egg wrapped in sausage, dredged in breadcrumbs, then deep-fried. It can be eaten hot or cold, and for some unfathomable reason, it is a popular food item to take on picnics.

In Dec 2020, chef Jon Fell made a Scotch egg that weighed a whopping 9.5 kilograms (21 pounds) and measuring53 centimeters (21 inches) across. He used an ostrich egg, 3.2 kilograms (7 pounds) of sausage, 2.3 liters (4 pints) of milk, and five loaves of bread in its creation.

I confess that I have never been a fan of eggs of any type and in any form. Hard-boiled eggs are quite awful due to the sulfurous smell and the odd, somewhat rubbery texture. The addition of sausage and bread crumbs just makes it worse, in my opinion. I’ll pass, thanks.^[2]

8 Black Pudding

Make no mistake, this is most definitely not a pudding. It’s actually a blood sausage, which is usually fried, grilled, or sometimes even boiled. Historically served with a full English breakfast, many claim it is a great cure for a hangover. Salty and savory, flavored packed with fat and spices, this congealed blood and oats brew is surprisingly tasty.

What is a full English breakfast? Traditionally, this coronary-inducing plateful includes fried sausages, fried bacon, fried eggs, fried mushrooms, baked beans, grilled tomatoes, hash browns, and toast with lashings of butter.

Devon-based butcher, Chris McCabe, says he owes his life to a black pudding when he accidentally shut himself in a walk-in freezer in 2017. The door release button was frozen over, and working alone, he was in danger of freezing to death within the hour. He grabbed a 1.5-kilogram (3.3-pound) frozen black pudding (made by HM Sheridan of Ballater, Aberdeenshire, who holds a royal warrant for supplying meat to Queen Elizabeth II) and bashed the iced-up button until he was able to exit the freezer. Upon hearing of the near escape from an icy fate when visiting Sheridan’s, Prince Charles reportedly commented, “My word, it’s like a truncheon, isn’t it? Will you please give Mr. McCabe my best wishes.”^[3]

7 Chip Butty

This is what many Brits think is the ultimate in comfort food—a sandwich made with french fries and little else. A chip butty is just two pieces of soft white bread spread with butter and filled with a generous handful of thick-cut chips (fries). An alternate version involves using baked or fried fish fingers in place of the chips. Unfortunately, the bread gets soggy from the grease, and the addition of ketchup makes matters even worse. Either version is a somewhat dodgy culinary creation, in my estimation, but my kids and my husband would all strongly disagree.

A British statistician has come up with what he considers to be the ideal ratios needed to make the perfect chip butty. Dr. James Hind claims a well-made butty has 12 thick-cut chips, two 40-gram (1.4-ounce) pieces of medium-sliced white bread, tomato sauce or ketchup, and butter. Absolutely no mayo or margarine. He based his findings on the preferences of 2,000 Brits who were surveyed by a supermarket chain. “The most important thing is to have the weight of chips at least three-quarters of the weight of the bread plus ketchup,” explained Dr. Hind.^[4]

6 Mushy Peas

This is a well-known accompaniment to traditional fish and chips. Mushy peas are exactly what they sound like, as they are cooked peas that are seasoned with salt and pepper, then mashed until they are of a similar texture to that of refried beans. Add even more salt and pepper or even malt vinegar if desired, then heap up on a piece of beer-battered fish or on a slice of buttered, toasted bread. This is not exactly the most attractive dish, looking as though it’s been thoroughly chewed and then regurgitated onto the plate, but if made right, it’s kind of okay.

In May 2022, a Staffordshire woman—Wendy Mountford—was in court, facing assault charges after she attacked a fish and chip shop owner, pelting her with mushy peas and hitting her in the face with a plate. Apparently, Mountford was outraged that some of the food items were allegedly delivered cold. The assault victim described, “I saw later that there were peas down my back. I turned around to ask her what she was doing, but as I turned, I saw this plate hurtle at my face, and I just felt this massive pain.” Mushy pea rage is apparently a thing nowadays?^[5]

5 Jellied Eels

Take some eels, chop them up, boil them in a slightly spiced stock, and then set them aside until they congeal into some sort of vile, lumpy, slimy, gooey jelly. Basically, imagine the biggest, slimiest, downright nastiest slug you’ve ever seen, then imagine that you are eating it. Or, as some have described, eating something that looks like a fish that has been eaten by another fish and tasting like what is left behind when a ghost sneezes.

Apparently, sales of jellied eels spiked (albeit temporarily) when David Beckham was pictured in 2019 eating them at the pie and mash shop where he grew up. However, most folks would no doubt pass on these, but if you can get past the wholly unappetizing appearance, the flavor is only slightly salty and not overly fishy tasting. Surprisingly there are not a lot of bones to work around either. If you’re feeling brave, give it a try!^[6]

4 Mince Pies

Synonymous with Christmas, mince pies are a seasonal treat that is probably about as important to Brits as Santa Claus and a well-decked-out tree are in bringing out the right atmosphere during the holiday season. While they did contain actual meat once upon a time, the “mince” in these little pies is actually a tangy, overly sweet combination of mixed dried fruit and spices, often also containing chopped apple and citrus rind. Boozy versions can include a healthy splash of port, sherry, or rum.

While not technically illegal per se, the story goes that in the mid-1600s, eating them was thought to be a sign of a secret celebration of Christmas, which had been strictly outlawed. Some claim that Oliver Cromwell was determined to crack down on gluttony in England and outlawed a number of different festive treats. Christmas and all the gastronomic goodies were formally reinstated in England in 1660 when King Charles II ascended to the throne.

These days, they are strictly sweet mini pies in a shortcrust pastry (pie crust) which is always overly thick. The filling has a somewhat odd flavor profile, sickly sweet with a bit of a zingy tang, but they’re delicious served warm, accompanied by thick cream and hot custard. Yum!^[7]

3 Yorkshire Pudding

Don’t let the name and the fact that they are vaguely muffin-shaped fool you—this is no dessert. They are actually odd, puffy blobs made from eggs, milk, flour, and fat. As the name suggests, it originated in the Yorkshire region of northern England and, in the USA, some might know them as “popovers.”

In May 2022, a luxury hotel in Leeds launched a menu dedicated entirely to Yorkshire puddings. The menu includes topping combinations of wild mushrooms, pearl onions, and smoked pancetta; black pudding and apple; and ox cheek and bone marrow mash. Each “pud” is served with a topping of the obligatory gravy.

By themselves, however, they are bland and unappetizing, but they are an essential accompaniment to a traditional Sunday roast meal. They are at their best when made from a batter containing drippings from the roast beef or mutton pan and drowned in a rich gravy.^[8]

2 Stargazy Pie

Don’t get me wrong, I love a good pie. One of my personal favorites is a TexMex-inspired combination of ground beef, cooked rice, and pinto beans, with a heavy-handed splash of Tabasco sauce thrown in for good measure. So good. So very good!

By way of contrast, the Brits have the Stargazy Pie, something that even this pie-lover wouldn’t think of hooking into. Originating in Cornwall in southwest England, the main ingredient in stargazy pie is pilchards (sardines), along with potatoes and eggs in a pastry crust. The fish heads are left protruding from the crust “lid” of the pie, as though gazing at the stars, hence the name.

The legendary tale goes that around 1600, a Cornish coastal town was besieged by a massive storm for many days, and none of the boats could go out to fish. The whole town was threatened with starvation when one brave soul, the delightfully named Tom Bawcock, went out in his boat and returned with a huge catch of pilchards. In celebration, they baked a huge fish pie in his honor.^[9]

I like fish; I love pies, but this is wrong on so many levels. This is a bit of a gastronomic nightmare.

1 Haggis

One of my favorite movies is the 1986 cult classic Highlander, where proud Scotsman Sean Connery plays Egyptian-come-Spanish immortal warrior Ramirez. When the Highlander explains to Ramirez that a haggis is a sheep’s stomach stuffed with meat and barley and that you eat it, a grossed-out Ramirez replies, “How revolting!” (Adding to the irony, the Highlander is played by French actor Christopher Lambert, but I digress.)

I admittedly love haggis, Scotland’s national dish. Yes, it contains a finely chopped sheep’s heart, liver, and lungs, some random oats, barley, or other grains, and a whole lot of seasoning. It is then packed into the sheep’s stomach or faux substitute and then boiled. It is surprisingly filling and downright delicious. It’s also been outlawed in the United States since 1971, as the agency that governs food standards banned any food containing sheep lungs, a key ingredient in haggis, giving it a somewhat crumbly texture. America, you don’t know what you’re missing!^[10]

There is nothing like some tasty fast food. For many of us, it’s convenient, affordable, and delicious. But getting caught in the same routine of ordering your “usual” from your favorite fast food joint is easy. Why not try a menu hack the next time you have a craving?

Menu hacks allow people to order (or at least request) special items from the restaurant. Sometimes these are items that have been discontinued. Other items were created by creative kitchen cooks or a simple combination of two (or more) normal menu items.

So, let’s get creative and try something new! Below, we’ll review ten menu hacks from your favorite fast food joints. From special sandwiches to fries, custom drinks, and desserts, this has all the fast food favorites you never knew you wanted!

10 Wendy’s Meat Cube/Grand Slam Burger

Our first menu hack comes from Wendy’s. Wendy’s offers a wide variety of hamburgers on their menu; however, they have another secret, special burger that you can order. This burger has three names, so make sure to order it carefully. It is sometimes called the Meat Cube, Dave’s Hot ‘n Juicy 1-lb Quadruple, or the Grand Slam Burger.

So what is it? The Meat Cube consists of four quarter-pound hamburger patties totaling a pound of ground beef. The patties are served on a traditional Wendy’s bun, complete with all of the typical toppings, including cheese. To order it, try asking for it by name. Explain what you need if the employee does not know what you are talking about. It is basically a 3/4 pound burger, with an extra patty and slice of cheese added.

9 McDonald’s Apple Pie McFlurry

Next, we’ll look at an unusual combination of two classic treats. McDonald’s is often the first restaurant people think of when they think of fast food. Because of this, McDonald’s also has a fairly extensive menu, complete with various burgers, chicken, fish, and sides. They also have some fairly iconic desserts. For our next menu hack, let’s combine two of their famous desserts that you may not have thought would complement each other.

The Apple Pie McFlurry is just what it sounds like. It combines a full apple pie blended with an original McFlurry treat. You may want to eat it quickly before it gets melty and congealed. But when enjoyed fresh, it’s hard to beat the combination of apple pie and ice cream.

So, if you are looking for a sweet treat that is both cold and hot, what is more American than an apple pie McFlurry from McDonald’s? You can also try blending other kinds of pie, but the Apple Pie McFlurry is by far the most popular.

8 In-N-Out Animal-Style Fries and Burger

In-N-Out is known for having delicious burgers and fries. Many consider their burgers to be some of the best fast food burgers in the country. However, some fast food connoisseurs want to take it up a notch. In order to do that, fast food aficionados should order their fries “animal style.”

Animal-style fries are the most popular menu hack for In-N-Out and maybe the most well-known on our list. In order to be “animal style,” the fries are covered with:

• Melted cheese
• In-N-Out spread
• Grilled onions

These fries are basically a meal all on their own. You can also order an animal-style burger, which includes the same ingredients piled on a burger. Of all the items on this list, these are almost guaranteed to be available, so you definitely won’t get any weird looks from the cashier.

7 McDonald’s Land, Sea, and Air Burger

Our next menu hack comes from the king of fast food, McDonald’s. This one is… a bit of an acquired taste. Have you ever wanted the best of both worlds? What about the best of three worlds? Well, that is the idea with this Frankenstein of a sandwich.

The Land, Sea, and Air Burger combine three of McDonald’s best-known sandwiches. The land element of the sandwich is a Big Mac (or a McDouble). Next, the sea is represented by a Filet-O-Fish sandwich. Lastly, the air is represented by a McChicken patty… for some reason. (They do know chickens can’t really fly, right?)

You build your sandwich by adding the fish and chicken patties into the middle of your Big Mac. Open wide, and taste a little bit of everything with this monstrous sandwich. While employees may be aware of the Land, Sea, and Air Burger, it is probably a better choice for you to build your own using the three sandwiches. Just be sure to have a drink ready to wash it all down.

6 Burger King Frings

Hacks don’t necessarily have to be complicated. The next item came about simply because someone asked. Burger King is known for having delicious French fries; however, they are known for their onion rings as well (perhaps because most fast food restaurants don’t have onion rings). This leaves customers in a conundrum when choosing their combos.

Get the fries? Get the onion rings? Get both? Getting both is the way to go! You can simply order half fries and half onion rings by asking. At some restaurants, this is referred to as frings, but at others, ordering frings may leave your cashier confused.

To keep it simple, just ask for half and half, and enjoy your two favorite fried sides simultaneously. Be sure to try dipping the French fries in the zesty onion ring sauce as well. You may never have to choose between fries and onion rings again.

5 Starbucks Dirty Chai

If you’re at Starbucks, you are likely looking for a jolt of caffeine to get you through your day or night! So, why not try something different besides a simple drip coffee? Chai is a popular drink that is smooth, delicious, and easy to drink. However, it doesn’t pack the punch of a typical coffee drink. So, hack the menu and get everything you want!

Order a Dirty Chai from Starbucks by simply adding an Espresso shot into a traditional Chai Latte. A Chai Latte is already on the menu, but just adding a single shot of Espresso can take your caffeine game to the next level. Or, for those days when you are really dragging, why not add a second Espresso shot? Not only will a Dirty Chai give you the rush of energy you need, but it’s also packed with nutrients and all kinds of health benefits.

4 Arby’s Bacon, Beef, and Cheddar

Arby’s has the meats. We all know it. Now, the issue is, which meat do you choose?

Arby’s has several sandwich options, from Market Fresh sandwiches to classic Roast Beef. However, one of their classics, which they are best known for, is a simple Beef ‘n Cheddar Sandwich. This sandwich comes with thinly sliced roast beef, cheddar cheese sauce, and Arby’s sauce, all on a soft onion bun.

This is the favorite of many Arby’s fans, including yours truly. Take yours to the next level by adding bacon! Adding bacon to this already delicious sandwich adds a depth of flavor and texture, making what seemed like a perfect sandwich even better.

Arby’s employees will be happy to prepare this sandwich for you; just ask for a Beef ‘n Cheddar with bacon. You won’t regret it!

3 Chick-Fil-A Root Beer Float

Chick-Fil-A is the favorite fast food joint of many connoisseurs. They have a somewhat limited menu, based largely around fried chicken. However, because of this, just about everything on their menu is delicious. One of the best menu hacks from Chick-Fil-A is a simple root beer float. This involves asking for a scoop (or more) of their delicious Ice Dream treat to be added to Root Beer.

Be sure not to include any ice! The Chick-Fil-A root beer float is a dream come true (pun intended) because of their creamy, delicious Ice Dream. They didn’t invent the root beer float, but they may have perfected it. The friendly employees at Chick-Fil-A will be happy to help you with this menu hack.

2 Taco Bell Cheesarito

Taco Bell is known for making up food items. Crunchwrap? Cheesy Gordita Crunch? Mexican Pizza? Quesarita? These are just some of the many different food items that Taco Bell has produced over the years. They are creative and constantly develop new things for their fans to try. They even invented a new meal. Fourth meal, anyone? Because of this, their employees are often familiar with creating exciting inventions out of their typical ingredients. The Cheesarito is one such item.

It has an incredible name but is a pretty straightforward snack, at least by Taco Bell standards. The Cheesarito is a value menu item, too, making it one of the cheapest on our list. It is made with melted cheese, scallions, and Taco Bell sauce, all wrapped in a tortilla. Great for a small snack or as an additional treat to go along with your tacos. The Cheesarito may just be your new favorite fast food menu item.

1 Starbucks Cinnamon Roll Frappe

Another decadent drink from Starbucks rounds out our list. Starbucks has many, many drink options. But the one they don’t tell you about or put on the menu is the Cinnamon Roll Frappuccino. Like it sounds, this drink was created to imitate the taste of a fresh cinnamon roll (Cinnabon, anyone?). Creating this menu hack may take some careful explaining to your barista.

First, request a vanilla bean crème Frappuccino. Then, request two (or three, depending on taste) pumps of Starbucks’ Cinnamon Dolce Syrup. This will result in a delicious cinnamon roll drink that will make you feel like you are back in a mall food court. Most Starbucks should be able to prepare this drink as long as they have the Cinnamon Dolce Syrup available.

Starbucks has many menu hacks available, and you can make all sorts of custom drinks, from a Cake Batter Frappuccino to Candy Cane or Butterbeer. If they don’t, why not create your own new menu hack? It may be the next big thing.