Looking for fresh inspiration to spark romance? These 10 dating tips, harvested from the annals of history, offer quirky, clever, and sometimes downright daring strategies to up your love game. Whether you’re courting a new flame or rekindling an old spark, let the past be your guide.
10 Use A Fan For Subtle Flirting
Fans have fluttered through centuries, but it was the eighteenth‑century European ladies who turned them into covert communication tools. By mastering a secret ‘fan language’, women could send flirtatious signals without uttering a word, turning a simple accessory into a sophisticated love‑signal.
The repertoire was surprisingly extensive—over thirty distinct gestures. For instance, shielding one’s eyes behind an open fan whispered, “I love you,” while holding the fan in the left hand hinted at a desire to converse. Twirling the fan on the left side warned a suitor that onlookers were watching, making every flick a nuanced conversation.
9 Find A Partner At The Marriage Market
Herodotus recorded a Babylonian custom that guaranteed everyone—rich or poor, beautiful or plain—found a spouse. The community gathered at a bustling marriage market where men placed bids on prospective wives.
Initially, the most attractive women fetched the highest offers, pairing them with affluent suitors. As the auction progressed to women deemed less desirable—whether due to age, disability, or appearance—the dynamic flipped: the auctioneer paid participants to take these women as wives, and the lowest bid secured a match. The funds came from the surplus generated by the earlier sales, ensuring every woman walked away with a husband and a dowry.
The market welcomed outsiders, barred fathers from dictating matches, and required each bidder to have a guarantor. Moreover, every transaction carried a money‑back guarantee, safeguarding both parties if the union soured.
8 Share A Secret Language
When privacy was a luxury, clever couples devised covert ways to whisper sweet nothings. Thomas Edison, courting his second wife Mina Miller, turned to Morse code—a series of dots and dashes—to keep their affection hidden from disapproving parents.
Mina, only twenty, and Edison, thirty‑nine, were cautious about public displays. Edison taught her the telegraphic alphabet, and legend says he even proposed using the code, allowing a discreet, romantic confession that escaped prying eyes.
This technique illustrates how a simple, universally understood system can become an intimate bridge, letting lovers converse privately even in a crowded room.
7 Don’t Get Drunk In Front Of The In‑Laws
Winning over a future spouse’s family was once a matter of honor. The tale of Hippocleides of Attica warns us that a tipsy display can cost you a bride. In sixth‑century BC Sicyon, Cleisthenes organized a grand competition to find a husband for his daughter Agariste, inviting twelve of the era’s most eligible men.
After a series of athletic challenges, Hippocleides emerged as Cleisthenes’ favorite. Yet, at the celebratory banquet, he overindulged, performing a reckless handstand and kicking his legs to the music. The outraged host declared, “He danced away his wife,” and the honor passed to another suitor.
The moral? Keep composure in front of prospective in‑laws; a drunken mishap can swiftly dissolve even the most promising match.
6 Be Practical
Ancient Egyptians favored straightforward unions over elaborate rituals. When a woman moved her belongings from her parents’ home into a man’s house, the two were considered married—no grand ceremony required.
These unions often featured a prenuptial agreement between the husband and the bride’s father, outlining asset division should a split occur. Divorce was uncomplicated: possessions were divided, children stayed with the mother, and adultery invited severe penalties, sometimes even death.
Despite the pragmatism, romance still thrived. Vizier Ptahhotep’s “Maxims of Ptahhotep” urged husbands to love, feed, and clothe their wives, while early Egyptian inscriptions praised wives’ beauty, showing that practicality and affection coexisted.
5 Spend Some Quality Time Together
While many ancient societies relegated women to domestic duties, the Teutonic tribes defied that stereotype. Their women stood shoulder‑to‑shoulder with men on battlefields, providing sustenance, tending wounds, and, when necessary, brandishing swords and axes.
Plutarch recounts a Roman legion encountering a Teutonic camp defended by fierce women, their resolve captured in the phrase “furor Teutonicus.” Their unwavering bravery earned them a reputation for shared ferocity, a cultural hallmark of the tribe.
Tragically, after their defeat at Aquae Sextiae in 102 BC, many Teutonic women chose death over slavery, pleading to become sacred servants of Vesta before committing mass suicide—a testament to their devotion and unity with their warriors.
4 Try Love In A Bottle
When conventional courtship fails, some turned to chemistry. Across cultures, love potions—crafted from herbs, roots, and sometimes questionable ingredients—promised heightened desire or even guaranteed affection.
Medieval scholar Albertus Magnus described a concoction of periwinkle, leeks, and earthworms, powdered and sprinkled over a meal to strengthen marital love, warning that the same mix would kill fish if poured into a pond.
Other traditions favored marigolds, wild columbine, or the toxic jimsonweed of Indian folklore. While many ingredients lacked scientific backing, placebo effects often delivered the desired boost, making these brews a fascinating footnote in romantic history.
3 Write Your Feelings Down
Not everyone can speak eloquently in person, but the Vikings proved that ink could convey passion. Their sagas and poems celebrate love that endures beyond death, as seen in Njal’s Saga, where Njal’s wife chooses to die beside him, honoring their marital oath.
Saxo Grammaticus, in the Gesta Danorum, records Hagbaror’s haunting verses before his execution, expressing a yearning for eternal reunion with his wife: “Let the encircling bonds grip my throat… the final anguish shall bring pleasure, for our love shall be renewed.”
Yet, such poetic devotion carried risk. Writing lewd verses about an unmarried girl could tarnish her honor, provoking violent retribution from her family. In extreme cases, the offended kin might kill the poet to protect the woman’s reputation.
2 Exchange Gifts
Gifts have long been the language of affection. Across ages, societies instituted bride price, bridewealth, or dowry systems, where the groom or bride’s family transferred wealth to cement alliances.
During the Renaissance in Italy, lovers exchanged ornate belts, girdles, and pendants adorned with fertility symbols. These tokens—often sensual in design—served both as declarations of desire and as tangible reminders of a bond, bridging the gap between commerce and romance.
Beyond material value, such gestures fostered intimacy, allowing partners to showcase thoughtfulness and creativity, reinforcing the emotional connection that underpins lasting relationships.
1 Dissect A Woman To Learn Her Anatomy
Honore de Balzac, the 19th‑century French novelist, ventured into the macabre with his treatise “The Physiology of Marriage.” He argued that marriage resembled a science, insisting that a prospective husband should dissect at least one woman to study her anatomy before tying the knot.
Balzac believed men possessed a finite reserve of energy, which they should channel into work, while women needed to be kept busy to avoid succumbing to caprice. He even warned against offering women plain water, recommending instead a light infusion of Burgundy wine to keep them content.
Ironically, Balzac himself married late—at fifty—twenty years after penning his controversial guide, and he passed away merely five months later, leaving his eccentric advice as a curious footnote in marital literature.